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Thread: The Boyfriend

  1. #19

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    We ll he has been over a few times, they spent time together on the holidays and she sees all her other friends too.

    The Boyfriend has now moved about an hour away. The poor kid was getting the [email protected] beaten out of him by his mothers bf. This I know to be somewhat true, the bloke is a psycho and probably where the kids problems lie...

    Anyway dd says she will "make him" enrol in the new school with his cousin - we'll just have to see how long it lasts with the distance between them.

    Thanks everyone for your insight. I hope I won't be back in here again!

    Last edited by Lulu; February 3rd, 2008 at 09:18 AM.

  2. #20

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    After reading everything else, I was going to post - what is going on for the Boyfriend...because i felt in my gut something was up... and then I got to your last post. By the sound of it, you are raising a beautifully self aware, confident, compassionate young woman, and she was taking care of this hurting young man.... can't fault her for caring about others -saving them is another thing, but i guess you will just have to wait and see where it goes from here. Well done Lulu, you should be proud of you and her. your doing great at one of the hardest jobs in the world!

  3. #21

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    I have found with Jess when she had a BF I didn't really like/felt funny about I just said nothing negative about it and waited for it to pass. That way we hadn't fought and I knew she wouldn't get her back up and see him to spite me. She has never had one that was too terrible luckily!! (YET!) At least at this age they don't seem to stay together for too long although she has been with her current one for 5 months but that's OK cause I love him.
    Its so hard isn't it? Teenagers seem to have split personalities and you never know which one you are going to have to deal with!

  4. #22
    kirsty_lee Guest

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    LOl firstly... heyyyy sexy lulu!! Now... although im pregnant with my first i totally get where your coming from and i will be the first to admit that when dd brings home her first boyfriend it will be a lonnnnng chat with dd,the boy as well as myself and dp .. my dp is also scruffy looking and be very scary 6"4 shaved head and a goatee.. no one will be hurting his little girl iykwim. Now in saying all this.. when i was a teenager i had a boyfriend who i'd known since i was like 7 years old... my dad was sooo over protective.. ( he actually had a gun license .. with many guns) and the more that i knew he didnt like the boyfriend the more i rebelled there were times where i didnt even know if i really liked the boyfriend but seeing as it wasnt being accepted by my dad made me want to do it more... luckily now though they absolutely adore dp and vice versa (plus now im older im not dating idiots lol) but yeah .. tough situation.. you dont want her to get into any trouble but at the same time its hard to pretend to like someone when you dont lol

  5. #23

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    I chatted to Jess about this thread Lulu and she agreed that the more you say you don't want her to see the guy the more she will want to, she thinks you'd be best just letting him come over and being pleasant and let it run its course.
    BTW I love these threads cause I can chat to jess about them in a non threatening way.

  6. #24

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    I pretty much expressed how I was dissapointed in the whole lie thing. I knew it must be indicitive of something more and didn't want dd caught up in the drama of it all. Like she needs any more reason to be a Drama Queen!

    Accepting him has been the best way to go, I knew it would be but when they start being all weird on you, you realise that this could be The Crunch. The time when your parenting is to be tried out in the open for all to see....

    I should have had more faith in myself and I will next time. I am painfully aware DD has been left behind a bit with the 2 new babies coming along in quick succession and I sometimes I panic I missed something important in between bfing and cleaning weet bix off the walls, nappy changes etc etc etc. I was totally unprepared for how little time I had for the Teen Queen.

    I still make time for our chats - even if I have to ring her staight after school. Just because she can fend for herself doesn't mean I should leave her to it. I remember always wanting to be left alone as a teen, but it wasn't always to best for me!

  7. #25

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    I find that too Lulu. I often take Jess for granted and find it hard to give her enough time cause Riley is so little. I find in some ways though coping with all the different age related problems is not as stressful as if I was coping with 3 teens IYKWIM?

  8. #26
    kirsty_lee Guest

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    But Lulu, sometimes parents don't realise that teenagers are alot smarter than we give them credit for. She sounds like she's got a good head on her shoulders and spose could be doing alot worse than what she is. She would realise the pressure your under with babies. Although my mother and I had some very heated moments when I was a teenager I had the sort of relationship with her where nothing was kept from her, she knew everything I was doing, where I was etc and I absolutely loved being able to do what I wanted just as long as I honest with her. I hopethat when my dd is older I will have the same relationship with her I believe there is still ways for mother and daughter to be friends as well as being able to be mother and daughter with boundaries/rules and consequences. Also I forgot to say in my last post.. she's 15.. and this is pretty much what all 15 year olds these days go through...just be thankful she's not hanging around with boys much older than she is. Hopefully my opinion has helped as im still young (not that you girls are old lol) even though I don't have a child as of yet...

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