I know I used to think 13-14 year old boys were the pits. Studies have shown that during adolescence our brains rewire to the point that we lose levels of compassion and self-control. Teenagers are self-absorbed for a reason - their brain is undergoing similar growth to toddlers. They need similar boundaries as 2 year olds.

A couple of other books you may find interesting include:
He'll Be Ok: Growing Gorgeous Boys Into Good Men, Celia Lashlie
The New Manhood, and Raising Boys, Steve Biddulph (apparently Raising Boys revised version includes more on teenagers)

GL - sounds like you're having a tough time atm.