I'm not sure how to start... I feel empty and alone. I feel like no-one understands, especially not my partner... and worst of all- i feel "faulty", or broken.
I've had operations for endometriosis and the doctors have said i'd find it difficult to conceive... but we did and my body changed and was so happy...
I decided to move some furniture - felt all happy and spring cleaningly and I felt such terrible pain.... And after a day in bed in agonizing pain and crying, i lost her. I lost my little one and it was my fault. I just moved 1 bookcase and 1 trunk and i hurt her and me. I didn't mean to hurt her!
I bled for 2 days and since i've had 3 "periods" bleeding only 2 days like a painful memory that haunts me every time. My periods now have agonizing pain and i feel dizzy and faint.
I feel like no-one can help me, and my partner says "don't worry, it'll all be okay"... but i think i'm broken. i'm not right. i failed. i feel faulty. i feel angry... so angry at myself.
I sometimes think maybe i'm not meant to have children ever, maybe it was a sign?
I work as a psychic and i help others through pain and sadness and indecision and i couldn't help myself. I couldn't "see" my future with my little girl and I can't "see" anything now.
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