Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage/Loss -February 2009

[charm]

I feel relieved to have found this forum. I am new here i was 12 weeks pregnant monday 17.2.09 I started spotting, Tuesday i had an U/S and was informed my baby had passed away 3 or weeks previously, Wednesday I was booked in for a D&C. I feel like like it all happened to somebody else I feel so empty and desperately want to fall pregnant. It's been 10 days since the D&C and I am still bleeding does anybody have any suggestions when I can try again for another baby I was told 2 cycles but at the moment that feels like a lifetime away. I see the OB next week to find ot the pathology results and I feel scared .And then there is everybody making their comments (You already have two maybe it's meant to be) and telling there stories and I just feel like I want to hide from the world.

[mrzbaby]

I feel relieved to have found this forum. I am new here i was 12 weeks pregnant monday 17.2.09 I started spotting, Tuesday i had an U/S and was informed my baby had passed away 3 or weeks previously, Wednesday I was booked in for a D&C. I feel like like it all happened to somebody else I feel so empty and desperately want to fall pregnant. It's been 10 days since the D&C and I am still bleeding does anybody have any suggestions when I can try again for another baby I was told 2 cycles but at the moment that feels like a lifetime away. I see the OB next week to find ot the pathology results and I feel scared .And then there is everybody making their comments (You already have two maybe it's meant to be) and telling there stories and I just feel like I want to hide from the world.

Oh Charm.... DON"T TAKE ANY NOTICE OF THEM.
I have 3 beautiful kids and have had the same comments from my family, friends and even a midwife !!! It was our decision to have another as it was yours and your DH as well.
I had to have 2 D&C after my M/C the last one on Wed after a scan revealed more retained products and then a re-admimission on Friday ( just got out today ) with an possible infection ...( Don't know if I have one or not).
They told me to wait for 2 cycles as well and i have decided to just start trying after June ( if I feel strong enough).
I have days where I am just so positive and think lets just get back into this Baby dancing / baking then other days I am so so scared of going through all of this again i think no I will settle with my 3. We wanted this baby to complete our family..
Allow yourself some time to get you head sorted ( and your DH's as well)...I was like you wheeled back from surgery saying right i want to start trying NOW!.
Take the advice of waiting 2 cycles as my ob and the midwives have said your body needs that amount of time to 'recover' from the last preg and D&C, plus it lessens the risk of M/C as well. Apparently you have a higher rate of MC after a D&C if you fall preg before your first cycle.

I will be joining you on the ttc journey....

Smi.......Feeling for you and DH at the moment....hoping you both get employment soon. my SIL was retrenched last week...PS I still pop into our Belly buddies group to see how everyone is going... glad to see your all doing well.. Take care Em.

AFM: Well after the 2nd D&C on Wednesday I was back in on Friday with a possibnle infection and have finally returned home today!!! yay!!!.
I had the experience of after birth pains last night . OMG I have nevr had these before....OUCH! they just didn't give up!!.
Em

[Shortcake]

Hello everyone! Sorry I have just been lurking lately! My father had bypass surgery done on Wednesday so I have been very busy taking care of everyone and seeing him. He finally is home as of yesterday.

Ruthie- I am devestated by your news. May you find the support and comfort you need from family & friends. We are all here for you!

Be back later for persies.

[RhiChiChi]

Jen – Of course you can call me Rhi! Actually I quite like it. I love the little pic – hiding behind the computer, had a giggle!

Boble – what a crappy period you are going through. Seems like it is happening all at once, hopefully that means better times to come! Praying for your BFP! I didn’t know about the reading from ‘Ruby’ ??? Must be behind the times! OMG! How fantastic is that reading! I wonder which it will be??!!

Babymiracles – Sorry I can’t help with the spotting q, I haven’t experienced that. Such a mean thing our body does at times.

Charm – Welcome and sorry for your loss. I have only recently joined this thread but already feel like part of a family – I hope you can to! In relation to your q – I haven’t had a d&c but from most of what others have said, it is an emotional decision. I was told wait the two cycles after my m/c’s – I think that is more in case there was anything that my body didn’t naturally remove.
Insensitive comments like that do not help and who is to say that you should only be blessed with two children? I understand how you want to hide from the world – I was especially like that with my first two m/c’s. Your feelings are completely normal. Feel free to vent/rant away, we can totally relate.

Mrzbaby – Hope you are ok. xx

Hello to everyone else – hope you are all ok?

Look forward to ‘catching up’ with everyone else during the week

Have a great day
xx

[jen805]

boble--Sorry to hear about your insomnia, I'm experiencing a bit of the same since I've been sleeping with DS since his surgery! It's a bit like wandering about in La La Land! Best of luck with your tribunal, try not to let it stress you out too much. Never heard of Ruby, but saying lots of prayers that your reading is accurate!



Aww, charm, I'm sorry sounds so lame and insignificant sometimes... but for lack of a better term, I'm truly, truly sorry for your loss! I can't believe people can say such heartless and tactless things--although I think for the most part it's probably well-intentioned-- but honestly, I'd prefer people keep their mouth shut if they haven't been thru a m/c and don't know what to say! The last thing on earth you want to hear when you're grieving the loss of your baby is "maybe it was meant to be", or "at least you know you can get pg", or (and this is the worst!) "at least it happened now, and you didn't have a child born with defects!" Can you believe there's actually people cruel enough to say things like that? Please know that you are among understanding friends here! Allow yourself to feel whatever it is you're feeling--and don't feel ashamed for it! Feel free to vent, scream, cry, yell... it's all part of the grieving process that will help you heal and move forward. The other girls have pretty much covered it with when to TTC again. My dr. advised I wait for 2 cycles, and I didn't have a D&C. Only you will know when you're ready. Wish you the best of luck with your test results--you're in my thoughts and



Shortcake--Glad to hear your dad's surgery went well, and he's now home recuperating! He's in my thoughts and prayers for a speedy recovery!



to Rhi & mrzbaby!



for my fishy friends megsmum & babymiracles (only 4 more sleeps 'til your scan!)

[jen805]

my Friday chat girls! mollycat, plc, fifi, & Krystie!! Miss you all! Angel, wish you were still here!



Toccara--Miss you stranger!



WTH--Hope you're enjoying your trip! Some for your journey--we miss you!



for Hannah & Mel!



Ruthie--Stay strong, hon, you can fight this! Thinking of you!

[RhiChiChi]

Hey all,

Just a quick vent as I can't concentrate on work because this is eating at me. I have just been told by my cousin her bf is pregnant and is about 16/17 weeks along. OMG another person I know that is pg. That is now 4 people due to have babies. It should be me! I should be announcing, not them! I feel like crap now. I truly thought I was getting over these feelings. I had to pretend I was happy for her (well I am) but **** - another person? Why is the universe being so cruel? The other thing is I'll be seeing her just before she is due to give birth cos she will be at my cousins 40th. Am over it. arrrrrrgggggggg. Sorry vent over.