Trying to Conceive After Miscarriage or Loss October '08

hi everyone!

just to clear some things up, I am in the right thread as I am trying to concieve after miscarriage ( may 2008) after trying for 2 years and what i meant by " you lucky ladies who get pregnant" is that to me 6 or 7 months or trying is quick! I know to them it isnt, but to me it is. i meant no insult by this, more of a pick me up to them as there are ppl worse off, like me! I'm not here to cause trouble at all! I just see so many ppl with tickers counting down to there due date and im still stuck in the TTC forums I just feel like im the last one left. also i have pms haha anyway I hope all goes well with everyone and im going to assisted conception forum now as i think thats where i belong!

ME- registered maternity nurse 21
DP- marine specialist -army 21
TTC#1 over 2 years
one loss may 08
6th cycle since MC
CD26 of 28

21andTTC#1,

I know it can be very hard to hear of women getting their BFP's, its never easy, but the truth is, the women in here have travelled a very bumpy road, no matter how long they have been trying. 7-8 month of TTC can feel like an eterninty when your'e faced with month after month of dissapointment.... then a little hope....then shattered dreams. I have been trying for nearly 4 years...it never gets any easier. Some poeple in this thread may not have been ttc for that long, but they certainly know what it feels like to be be faced with one of the worst kinds of sadness....dissapointment, fear, anxiety and hopelesness. We may have been travelling down the ttc road for different periods of time, but the road is bumpy from the get go. The only thing I can say (and im referring to myself only here) it that the longer you travel the more endurance you build. I feel like the 1st year of ttc was the hardest, because I had to deal with shattered expectations, from there on...I built some resiliance...and figure, well ive come this far, I can keep going...and I do. The truth is, we are all in the same boat and the best gift we can give eachother is to support eachother through this journey...ride the bumps with eachother, pick eachother up when we fall and coach eachother to keep going. The worst thing we can do is compare ourselves with eachother, for in doing that, we seperate ourselves from others and stand alone...a whole army is stronger than 1 trooper....right girls????

jenushka - I'm so glad that you have a supportive doc in your 'Dr Amazing'. I've found a supportive doctor makes a big difference to the journey. Our Ob is fab & so wonderful, although I know he isn't a miracle worker and really had no control over this bubba it still really helped to have his support & encouragement. Yay for the hcg levels!!! The other doc (not normal one) doesn't sound that great though.

jonisteve - sorry you have to be here and big hugs to you. The ladies in here are fab and will help you through the ttcaml journey. It's a really tough time that we all know too well unfortunately. It took af 6 weeks after my first d&c to appear, then 4 weeks after my second d&c. We ttc straight away the first time but not the second as I had some tests so we had a 4 month 'rest'.

I haven't been on for a couple of days, so many posts, I did a quick read but I get all muddled and confused.
If anyone has advice on how to reply to others posts without getting it all messed up I would apprieciate it.

Well today I am 12 days late, our last :bfn: was on Sunday. I cried for hours, I was so sure this was the month. My DH gave me a tablet and put me to bed. He left me there and there I stayed til yesterday afternoon. I was still hoping that I might be and that all the hpt's were wrong.

Then last night we got some bad news and I am actually glad I'm not UTD(that is something I never thought I would say).

My DH's cousin had a US yesterday. Her little boy died in her womb at 27 wks 1 day. And the idiotic public hospital sedated her and sent her home, telling her that either today or tomorrow she would have to go abck to have him. I can't believe they sent her home. They don't send you home at the private hospital, and they definatly don't muck you around with what day you will be going through labour.

I feel so bad because I was so jealous when she told us she was pregnant, i was happy for her but oh so jealous.

Yesterday I nearly emailed her to say we had brought her the rocker she wanted I am so glad i didn't.

I am releived I have gotten :bfn:'s because I would have felt so guilty if I was UTD.

Why do I feel like I have just lost my :angel: 's again ??? Why am I absouloutly devastated for her, I know it's normal to be upset but I am more than that. I haven't stopped crying since last night, not even when I took my boys to school. I don't know why I am acting like this, but I can't snap out of it.

I am thinking about sending her mum a cd with the song we used at dominques memorial and a couple of other songs that have meaning incase they want to use them. What do you guys reckon??

When I found out she was UTD I told my DH we would have to buy her something really good, that was my way of coping, doing something nice for her made it easier for me to deal with. Now I just wish I could stop her from having to go through this.

Sorry for going on so much, I just wanted to talk to someone!

People always say life wasn't meant to be easy but they never said it would be this dam hard either!!!

issy- thankyou for the response, i was expecting ppl to think i was being nasty although im not, its kinda hard on here as ppl dont know your expression or voice tone. I too have built resilience and accepted the fact i will never find it easy to get pregnant. I just want some answers! we are both 21 and healthy and still nothing for over 2 years! and i get the whole your too young thing although I have completed a degree and we are both professionals and been together since high school and engaged. I just get frustrated sometimes as i spend so much money on doctors and ovulation kits and pregnancy tests and im sure your in the same boat. I also struggle coping with the loss of our baby at almost 13 weeks and EDD is in nov and im dreading it. Anyway i really hope all goes well for you and you can oneday take your baby home.

Good luck to all the other girls!


ME- registered maternity nurse 21
DP- marine specialist -army 21
TTC#1 over 2 years
one loss may 08
6th cycle since MC
CD26 of 28

thanks, everyone has been alot of help. I wish everyone the best of luck. only God can help all of us and all of you will be in my prayers. He has a plan for all of us. I guess our little angels were special and He has bigger and better plans for all of us. I know that I am new but I hope that none of us will be here long. I would like to see due dates that stay for everyone. Huggs joni

Easha--Aww, honey, I'm so sorry :( I wish I had something exceptional to say to help you feel less pain and disappointment. Know that this :hug: is filled with love and support... wish I could give it to you in person!



Mel--:welcome: I'm glad you found your way to our little thread, although for obvious reasons, I wish we weren't all here! :hug: You're definitely NOT alone with your feelings! I :pray: that we're able to offer you all the comfort and support you need throughout your journey.... And, hey, you're not jealous and bitter, you're heartbroken... it's normal and natural for you to feel that way! I hope your journey with us is short and sweet, and you're blessed with a quick, sticky BFP!!



mollycat--Yay! I caught some :pink-babydust: Thanks! :hug: How's that Java coming along? No luck yet? Did you sign up for a new account?



Hello's and :hug: to chappas (sorry about the BFN!), Milla, fifi, & Tam

Will be back again later for the rest of the persies that I still haven't been able to finish! I'm working on it, though! Just don't want anyone to think I forgot them! :grouphug:

:grouphug: for everyone!!!!! does anyone chat or just post. I am very new to this.

Hi Team

Sorry have been offline - have been in Syds with DP and limited internet.

Welcome Jonisteve - sorry for your loss darling hopefully your stay will be short. People tend to do either (chat or post) or both honey - do whatever you feel comfortable with.
Mummy of 3b - I am so so sorry that you are having to live through your loss again. I totally understand how this would bring all those feelings back. My heart goes out to your DH's cousin and she is in my prayers.
Chappas - so sorry sweetheart
Jenushka - what a wonderful doctor you have - that must have been terrifying for you - you can hopefully breathe a little easier now. Yay!
Issy and 21 - wise words darling - it is so easy to get lost in your own grief and forget people have had to walk their own path
Smi - Happy Monday to you too petal

Sorry to anyone I have missed - hate losing a couple of days on here I feel like a total novice when I come back.

AFM - had bloods done again yesterday to see when to start Syneral and was told by the receptionist that I am not to start Syneral as my levels are not right yet. This led to the usual bawling my eyes out and today I am waiting to speak to my FS to see what the dealio is. I think I started too early and need to wait for my next period b4 TTC with again. Oh well, I made some fabulous tahini balls in my grief stricken moment. I am one of these weird people that cook their way through sadness. There is probably a scientific tissue:tahini ball/anzac biscuit etc ratio I could use.
Love to you all
Adelexxx

Just a quick little reminder to everyone who is doing the candle lighting for Pregnancy Loss and Awareness day...... Tomorrow is the day..... and its at 7pm for one hour and further information is on the october15th web site.

jenushka (the most Zen of all TP checkers :rofl: )--That was a :goodone: How scary for you, though! :hug: Glad that you were able to get right into the dr. That is very strange that he/she had never heard of Progesterone support during pg'cy! Hooray for Dr. Amazing--I'm so grateful that you have her! Hope the spotting stays away.... just relax as much as you can...sending lots of positive :stickyvibesgirl: :stickyvibesboy:



fifi--You must be so excited about your upcoming scan! :leap:



jonisteve--:welcome: So sorry for your loss, and that those are the circumstances under which we are meeting. I think maybe your body is still trying to get back to normal... although I didn't have a D&C, it still took some time for my body to get back to whatever "normal" is for me. Might be safer to give it one more month if you can stan the wait.... I know for me it was impossible to wait the 2 months that my dr. suggested I wait! I pray you feel comfortable and supported here--this is a great bunch of girls! :hug:

smi--Hey girlie friend! :hug: Hope your Monday wasn't too crappy.... mine was too busy to be crappy! But I feel I got some stuff accomplished, so that's a good thing! So how's it going with the Lee sitch?



plc--Argh! Yes, sorry, you missed another chat... but it was just me and Angel, so there was no surprise banners, balloons, etc. like you've all done for me before! ;) Bellyrubs for you! *kiss*



mollycat--Ok, I'm going to have to hold you to that night-time daycare just so I can get you into chat just once! Or maybe I'll just :pray: you get a wild hair up your booty one of these Friday nights! :lol:



21--No worries here with feeling like you're the only one left in a TTC forum. At my last count there were at least 26 of us here! And I've had 4 m/c's total, so I know a little something about having to bide my time and wait my turn. You just continue on everyday because you have to.... one foot in front of the other.... sure, there's disappointments, but such is life...you just keep keeping on, while supporting each other along the way. Just wanted to make sure you realized that you're NOT the only one left, unfortunately, there's too many of us!



issy--What you said what beautifully worded! You're awesome! Lot's of super duper big, huge :hug: coming at you right now! Careful, you're about to be knocked over! I have so much respect for you, thanks for your kind words--and you're absolutely right! :cheer:



AJC--*waving* Going to join us in chat again on Friday? :bellyrubs: for you and some :stickyvibesgirl: too!

Hey Jen Jen... whats with this "it was just me and Angel" .... whats with the JUST.... well well.. so thats how you really feel....:cry:

mummyO3B--Aww, honey, well of course you would be devastated for your DH's cousin! :hug: I'm so very sorry for her and her family! Please don't feel guilty--you never wished for this to happen to her! If anything, you'll be able to be that much more supportive of her since you know some of what she's going through. Sorry to hear about your BFN... hope things get worked out soon, one way or the other. Chin up, hon!



dellydoo--Sounds like you need some of these :hug: :hug: :hug: Hope your FS can give you some answers!



Angel--Still haven't gotten my pins in the mail for Oct. 15th! :o Hope it comes tomorrow so I can wear it on Wed! :crossfingers: Bought a candle that I'm going to keep lit all day! Thanks for the reminder! *kiss*

Angel-- :rofl: You know that's NOT what I meant you big doof! :rofl: I was saying it was only us in there--not that it was JUST us, like we're chopped liver or something! Would I really say that about US? :heartbeat: See, now don't you feel like a schmuck! :rofl:

Ok, ladies, I think I'm caught up for the most part, at least with those who posted. Sorry to those I missed.... Toccara--:hug: for you! I gotta get to bed, I'm beat! Will be back bright and early in the am! :grouphug: for all! *kiss* for some! You know who you are! ;)

So now your calling me a schmuck..... its bad enough that its JUST me... but now I m a schmuck too:crying: nope nope... not listening anymore :tmi:

:rofl:
:rofl:
:ROFL:

A me-post. Skip if you don't want to get out your violin.

As you can see by my new glorious signature my first IVF with PGD cycle was cancelled. I did end up growing a wonderful 11 follies and had much higher estrogen after the weekend - I thought all was well. But this IVF business is a bit more complicated then I thought. I had 3 over 10mm and they wanted more. They chose to halt my FSH after just 10 injections. I am really disappointed. My clinic gave me the option to take the trigger injection last night and then we DTD tonight/tomorrow morning in a hope of catching the egg. In desperation we have chosen to do this.

But, as you know, this defeats the purpose of IVF with PGD. It is such a gamble for us. I am hoping my FS (who I am seeing on Friday) will let us try a different type of cycle using Orgulutran (spelling?) when my AF comes. Otherwise, if we do a down reg cycle, I will clash with the Christmas business hours and they will not let me do another cycle until next January. I just don't think I can hold out that long.

To MegsMum and Angel - thank you. I really have appreciated your support these past few days :grouphug:

Take care
WTH

I've just logged on quickly while at work as I want to get opinions of something. But couldn't go past COLOR="Purple"]wth[/COLOR]without giving you a big :hug: :hug:. I don't know that much about the IVF process so I can't really offer any advice. But I'm sorry you've had this latest disappointment.

AFM - I wanted to ask about something I plan to do tomorrow. Since its is pregnancy loss remembrance day, I'm planning to send an email to tell those people in my life who don't already know about my m/c. I figured it would serve to promote awareness as well as help me avoid the question "So, when are you having kids?" An email means I can tell everyone at once without having to deal with well-intentioned but ultimately stupid comments. Am I being a coward? Is it corny?

Sorry for the lack of persies. Will come back after work.

WTH - So sorry that your first IVF cycle isn't to go ahead as planned. Hopefully the trigger shot and the eggies growing in those fat follicles will give you some luck! If it doesn't happen this month, then I hope your FS lets you change to the orangutan cycle. Yup, I know that I spelt it totally wrong, but monkeys are cute yeah? Hehehe. Good luck honey!!! :hug:

Angel schmuck - I'm definitely going to be lighting my candle tomorrow in remembrance of not only my own angel baby, but for the angel's of all the ladies that have come and gone through this thread, and all the other angel's that have not been destined to live in the arms of their parents.

Hen Schmuck - Now now, just because little chyan has the ability to flip the bird, doesn't mean that she hasn't got enough manners and proper upbringing to know to only use it in extreme circumstances :P

Hmmmm, the little :baby: emoticon has changed. It's still cute.... but I liked the old one better with the little baby trying to stand and falling on it's butt. Hehehehe

Hi All,

a big THANKS to AJC, CHAPPAS & JEN

I know I probably don't belong is this thread now, but I feel safe in here and cannot bring myself to leave. You ladies have all helped me get through my pain and dissapointment and have been there when I was feeling scared and alone. I will probably not post as much anymore but will check in now and then to see you all with your much deserved BFP'S.
Wishing you all :bluedust: :pink-babydust: :stickyvibesboy: :stickyvibesgirl:

Thank you all agian for your support, I don;t feel as if I'm totally out of danger yet, but I do feel a little more relaxed :hug:to all

Has anyone heard from Ruthie lately, I've been a little worried about her??

HannahD.... Hannah I think that is a FANTASTIC idea...... I would do it myself but I have already told everyone..... lol..... I get a bit like that incase you lovely ladies have not figured it out... occasionally require a leg up so i can get on my high horse..... but this one I am determined to educate people.... sort of like its why my little angels were in the first place..... You are MORE than welcome to use anything I have on my web site below..... copy paste... do whatever.... I think its a FANTASATIC idea.... huge hugs hun... huge hugs..... education is the only way this will get any easier for anyone who has to wear these shoes....

Krystie......Ohhhh damn.... that "orangutan cycle"..... ohhh crack me up.... having image of a bunch of bloody monkeys making monkey noises organising an IVF cycle.... hey heres a thought... they might actually act more humane than most FS.... :ROFL:


Tomorrow is candle candle candle day for me..... have to get DH to bring home my pin from work... its sitting on my desk waiting for tomorrow.... didnt know I would be taking time off work.....

As for little chyan... flippin the bird... hmmm wondering if maybe she saw Aunty Angel.... I m sure I did it discreetly......:think:

Where There s Hope...... ANYTIME hun.... ANYTIME

Larz...... I completely understand.... we build relationships in here that are so strong they are to hard to leave.... so come and go as you wish.... door is open... one day who knows.. we may lock the door on this thread because its now longer needed... but until then.. the door is open.... As for Ruthie..... I would probably think that she is taking time at the moment to get through the fog..... probably reading and keeping up with whats happening but maybe not able to post yet.... Huge Hugs to you Ruthie.... we are here for you when your fog lifts a bit more

21 - sweetheart hope ur dreams come true soon and you feel the sadness and frustration a little less :hug:
issy - go team :grouphug:
hannah - i don't think ur a coward at all - as you say ur raising awareness and you are also doing this by way of bravely sharing of yourself and your experience :hug:
fab 3/4 - it seems I'm full of hugs today so here :grouphug:
wth - i'll play the cello for you, not cos I think ur being melodramatic but because you are going thru so much (so much more than I can imagine) and the cello is so much more soulful and magestic IMO. pls know I am thinking and praying for you.
delly - so much respect for you sweet - I'll keep playing that cello for you too (i actually did get to Grade 2 but that was a long time ago and now just play it with my heart).
jonisteve - some of us chat on a friday night around 11.30pm (me - I'm struggling with it but aiming to be there this friday) but we mainly post. lots of lovely lovely ladies on BB with loads of experiences to chat to on BB.
MO3B - I would feel EXACTLY as you do if it were me in the same boat. sometimes the pain of MC is more manageable but it is truly never forgotten and can hit you in between the eyes without warning, making your eyes leak the tears uncontrollably. sometimes it is a combination of past tragedy mixed with present frustrations that makes us react the way we do. no logic, just pure emotion - it's this emotional release that makes us stronger over time. pls take care hun :hug:
hello to all the other lovelies here - esp. to Jenushka and her Dr Amazing

:hug:larz - Glad you are feeling more relaxed, take care of yourself hey?

Angel - Thanks for the reminder about tomorrow. I'm a bit bummed that I won't get my pin in time, but I think I'll wear it when I get it anyway. And there's always next year, so close to the anniversary of my m/c I'll never forget it :(

Krystie - Glad to see you are back in the land of the living ;)

Hannah - I think that it an excellent idea! I don't think you are being a coward at all - if more people knew about m/c and it's effect on us, then at least we might get a bit better support after one. I actually told a friend that I hadn't seen for a while on the weekend, I was a bit unsure about telling her but she was wonderful. She said all the things that you need to hear - that it is a real loss of a real baby, and that it needs to be acknowledged by other people and not ignored. It is so good when someone understands how you feel.

WTH - Massive :hug: again. You are more than welcome hun, anytime you need to talk. I only wish that I could have changed the outcome for you :( Take care.

Jen - Hi there cycle buddy :)

dellydoo - Sorry to hear that you can't start Synarel yet :( Delays are just so frustrating! I hope you FS can help you out, and enjoy those tahini balls! Yum...

jonisteve - Hi and welcome :) I'm so sorry for your loss and hope your stay here is short.

Hi there everyone else!

AFM, nothing much happening here today. Had my first injection for LP support today and getting heaps of cramps from it. Oh well....

Just a reminder my lovelies that tomorrow is rememberance day for all of our angels. For those of you who don;'t know I have done a post HERE to explain.

Jen - Enjoy your sleep honey! Thanks for the hugs.
Hannah - Darling I think that is a wonderful idea. You are so brave. I have told most but still run into acquaintances and have to tell them. Be strong - you will get such a rush of sympathy and love.
WTH - So sorry darling - my first cycle was almost cancelled and we ended up having to do FETs that did not work. I hope you get some answers from your FS.
Kyrstie - ORANGUTAN CYCLE????
plc - thanks honey - it feels nice to think someone is playing the cello just for me!
Megsmum - :bellyrubs: to you to ease cramps!

AFM - I just had a lovely lunch in Sydney with an old mate and I had a few glasses of wine. Sigh!

Journeying through miscarriage & loss is a very difficult path. As such please think twice and only press post when you are certain that your post will not cause hurt or upset.

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Hannah....... I keep thinking about your idea.... I really do LOVE it..... The more I think about it the more I think we should all do something like that....

My reason behind it is that it also makes it easier for the person you are telling...... when we tell in person there is it can be difficult for the person we are telling........ yeah i know... the "difficult for them.... they arent the ones who lost their angels"..... i know.... BUT i always believe that the best way is to always put yourself in the other persons shoes for a second so you can try and work out the best way of doing it.

An email is a way of putting something together... giving you time to compose exactly what you want to get accross to them..... then when they receive it... it gives them time to take it all in and then time to deal with it and time to compose a response back to you......

I love it Hannah.... I love it..... it educates openly..... in other words people who read it are not defensive or closed through to being uncomfortable.... they are "open" to what they are reading..... Love it

Angel - you are so right, I think it also means you can spell out how need to be treated right now. It will have a lot more impact as it is coming from someone they care about.
It is hard on other people because it is so sad and it is happening to someone they know and care for.
I am going to send an email out to my friends tomorrow and let them know it is Remembrance day.

Hi All,

Just wanted to thank you all for your well wishes, NO AF spells and hugs - you are the only people who truely understand. DH is trying to be supportive by saying we always have next month but he just infuriates me more - poor darl

We have decided to try a chinese herbalist as we are supposed to wait another month before seeing the gyno again. I cant go through another 4 whole weeks just doing nothing. Anyone had any luck with chinese herbs??

Anyhow going to eat chocolate and sulk a bit longer on the couch and then I have to pick myself up, dust myself off and get back to normal tomorrow

Thanks again

I've just sent an email out to all my friends reminding them or informing them of the rememberance day tomorrow. I went onto the main website and got somoe logo's off there and told everyone to light a candle in rememberance tomorrow.

I hope some go along with it, they may not have experieinced it themselves, but a lot of them will know someone who has, so let hope they do it because of someone they care about who has experienced a loss.

:)

Well I 've done the same fificlaire...... Broke it up into different groups of people.... those that needed and explanation and those that didnt......even some that already knew ;)

Easha,

I just wanted to send you a reply re. your question on the chinese herbs - I started TCM (herbs and acupuncture) in June, and I fell pregnant that very first cycle on herbs (unfortunately m/c in August). I might add that I'm 38 years old, so no longer a young chick in terms of fertility.

But there is no doubt that the herbs are helping: my periods are back to normal again (2 years ago they became lighter and shorter) and I can also tell from my basal body temperature chart that there are improvements. I am now on my third cycle on TCM, and I hope that I will soon be successful. I've read somewhere that most women conceive on the 4th or 5th cycle on herbs, but that's statistics of course. In any case, I would highly recommend it. Do you plan to do acupuncture as well?

My Western ob/gyn wants to put me on some medication by the end of the year, if nothing has happened by then. My Chinese doctor however thinks that it is not necessary and that the herbs will do their thing. I haven't decided yet what to do - 2 more cycles to go;)

You're right, what attracted me to TCM was the fact that it gave me some control and some initiative over this whole thing. I didn't feel so helpless anymore. If you want to read a bit more about it, I can recommend a book by Randine Lewis called the "Infertility Cure" (just google it). She has also a website with tons of valuable information on TCM.

Good luck and keep me posted;)

I've sent out emails to friends and work colleagues informing/reminding them of tomorrows special date. I've also posted a note on another forum I visit. I've already had one response from someone on this forum who will join us in remembering our angels.

Jen - I spotted you only caught the "pink" ones. CHEAT.

Easha - enjoy your chocolate. I enjoyed mine. Shame AF left so early, I've still got lots left.

EashaGood luck with the TCM hope it does the trick. And your right about the couch, chocolate and sulking. I feel that you are writing my posts for me. I read them and think to myself someone is going through exactly how I am feeling. In a way its comforting :comfort:

Hannah I think the email is a great idea. I hope that it goes well and that people are kind and considerate with what you are going through. I also like the fact that it will most probably stop the dreaded question, "So when are you going to have kids?" I get that question all the time and if the email you send at least stops that question then I think it's worth it.

WTH Ohh I ma so sorry sweetheart that your cycle was canceled. On a good note if there can be at least you know you do still have a chance there are little eggs up there. I hope that :fertilise: and you get a sticky healthy little jelly bean and in 9 months your miracle :hug:

Angel You make me :lol: your such a nice lady. FS put me on 25mg and I know I shouldn't have put i just took the 50mg. All the research I done everyone starts on 50mg. Even on the tablet information thing you get with the tablets state that 50mg is the usual dosage and not to take more then that unless directed to by your doctor. So only time will tell I guess. My FS is just over cautious I think. Thank you for you personal experience though it's much appreciated. I will let you know how it goes.


Jensuhka Sending you lots of sticky vibes hun. I hope your next BT has those levels heading for the sky.

Larz That's great news about your u/s so glad to hear that everything is going swell.

Joniesteve Sorry that you have had to join this forum but you will find comfort in the hearts of us all hear. I am so sorry for you loss but I know that there is nothing that I can say that will make you feel any better. I hope that your stay is here is short and that you are blessed with a healthy baby soon.

Mollycat I do apologise for the confusion I was trying to get to everyone. I will give it another go. Cycle day 5? am I right? AF should be almost out the door and getting ready to tie those :bd: shoes on.

Mummy of three boys Dont be hard on yourself. I have those days. I actually had one yesterday. I am glad DH wasn't home because I think he would have taken me to the Phsyic hospital. I just sat in front of the computer and cried and cried. I blame it on AF showing up just added to the pain. I hope that today was a better day for you. I find that if I keep busy it helps :hug:

delly I hope that the FS has some good news for you and that maybe you can still start the syneral this month if that's possible. Sorry I don't know much about it.

plc Thanks for checking up on me last night that was very sweet. I am doing better tonight. I hope all is well with you :hug:

Jen I have started BBT today 2nd day of my cycle so we will see how it goes. Counting down the days of your TWW with you.

To everyone else that I have missed I am sorry I did try to include everyone.

AFM I had my 1st tablet of clomid so :pray: that it does it's thing and I ovulate on time and get my BFP.

Hi noticed there's a few light on if anybody is interested in going to miscarriage and loss chat room.

I think I'll stay even after. I have felt so alone in this even with my dh. sometimes I feel like he didn't even hurt. but, I know that he did. he just doesn't show emotion very much. Does it ever get any easier? I know it's only been 2 weeks, I just feel like doing nothing and crying alot. I have to make myself get out of bed. I know none of this was my fault, but it still hurts just the same. after spotting all day yesterday and cramping (friday will be 2 wks after d and c) nothing today. It was wishful thinking that ant flo was here early and we were ready to start trying. dh wants to wait 2 cycles. I' m impatient.

jonisteve....... hun do you know how to get to the chat section of this site..... if you look to the top of the page your on now... there are pink tabs right up the top.... the 4th one along says live chat...... if you click on that it might not work straight away because you may have to sort your java out but once you have it sorted it means we will be able to chat live to you.... when you go in there you will see differnt rooms... we go to the miscarriage and loss room.

Hopefully see you soon.... maybe just a big chat could be just what you need...... i ll put the kettle on you bring the chocolates... :dance:

Tam - most times women begin on 50mgs of clomid - sometimes you will begin on less just to see how you respond. I was on 150mgs when I conceived Imogen - I needed that much to get a good response. The month she was conceived I had 3 mature follies on the 150mgs. I did get bloated and quite a bit of discomfort. Wishing you luck my love... :hug: