Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage or Loss ~ September 08 #2

[anneebee3]

Good morning beautiful women.

Angel - Fingers and toes crossed for you today and a huge . I'm also having a big belly laugh for you and sending over all my angels to you. I you are blessed today.

Jen - I know that 7 months isn't that long to be trying but it must feel like forever for you. I had to wait 3 months (2 cycles) before my doc gave us the green light and that felt so long. I kept thinking that I'm just wasting precious baby making & baking time. Apparently you can't rush this process, but it feels like a race to me.

Unfortunately for us we need to get pregnant again so we can determine if my other fallopian tube is blocked. If it is we have to operate again to remove it and then we can commence IVF. Our doc said that if I lost my first angel because of a blocked tube then we will more than likely have the same experience with my other tube. So I'm a little nervous about what might happen and that my body might do this again to my next angel, but like my DH said we don't have a choice unless we want to stop trying for a baby. That's definitely not an option for us. If it does happen again I've got a 5-6 month turn around before we can start IVF (2 months of pregnancy and then at least 3 months recovery). Unfortunately, I think of everything as a time frame now.

This is going to sound horrible, but when the doc told me I had an ectopic pregnancy I rang my family and asked them all to pray that I would m/c our angel. I found out in the morning that I would be operated on that night (I called that operation a compulsory abortion - I'm all for pro choice but abortions would never been an option for me) and at the time a m/c sounded like the better of the two evils. Unfortunately, our prayers weren't answered, but apparently I should be grateful that I survived. I didn't feel very grateful for agreeing to that operation. I know I didn't have a choice and my bubba would have past away anyway, but she was still alive and her little heart was still beating when I went into that operation and that really hurts me to think about.

What a sad sack I am.

[Babyfever2007]

Molly- You are brave darling I think I would be terribly ****ed if someone did that (used the name we were going to use type thing). I'm glad your happy for her & trying to be supportive even though its hard. You have not lost it your just hurt. Its totally understandable where you come from. It's not easy.

Annabee- I really hope that your Tube is not blocked & that you get pregnant with a baby that is in a healthy place to grow strong at. Did they not check or do a dye test afterwards to make sure? I really hope you don't have to go through all that & that when you do get your BFP things will go well for you. that your tubes are not blocked darling. I don't believe in abortions myself unless (the mom has a condition that will kill her, AKA eptopic as one of them, Or the baby has a conditon where he/she wont make it at birth). So, don't down yourself you never really went against yourself on abortions if you continued to let the baby grow you could have been seriously sick and could have died. And, about your toy.. Lol. Whats it called may I ask?? I wanna see what it looks like.. :-D. That sucks that the batterys died. Are they replacable??

[anneebee3]

BabyFever - I don?t know if I?m breaking any rules on this forum by putting this on, I?m not promoting the website I?m just using it for it?s picture of our new toy. Sorry in advance if this offends anyone, but it?s basically turns my DH into a vibrating doodle. Honestly, it was pretty good during the short time the batteries lasted.

Mollycat ? I totally understand what you?re going through. Many years ago one of my workmates (we were actually really great friends) fell pregnant and we were talking about baby names and I told her the name I would use one day for my baby girl. I didn?t really think anything of it, until a week later we were eating in the lunchroom and she announces that baby names they had chosen. Wouldn?t you believe it, she said my baby girl?s name. I nearly fell off my chair. I was shocked and pinged off. That was just wrong. She ended up having two children over the next few years ?.. both boys. I think it was karma. I was secretly a little glad too that they were boys. You never steel baby names off your close friends.

[anneebee3]

BabyFever - What time is it where you live? Is it Sunday or Monday? It's 11am Monday where I'm at. Just wondering when you get your BT results. I'm thinking it might be Sunday where you are. You must be hanging out for those results.

I've thought of an upside of having an ectopic pregnancy, who would have thought there was one. When we fall pregnant next time the doc will start doing scan from about 5 weeks. The norm at his office is a 10 week scan and apparently you can't request earlier scans or so I've read (unless there have complications of course). I can't wait to see my little bubble with my healthy bubba inside with a strong heartbeat. Last time we had an empty bubble in my uterus and my bubba got left behind in my fallopian tube. Not really sure what happened there. I'm just that our next bubba has more of a slip n slide experience through my other tube and comes flying out the other end and crashes straight into my uterus wall (we call it my cocoon and my papa calls it my nest) and snuggles in for the long haul.

[anneebee3]

Mistyfying - Ooops! I'm so sorry about that. Is that because of the nature of the image or because it was classed as advertising another website or both. This is my first forum I've ever been on so I'm still learning the ropes. I have just read through the guidelines, however am I permitted to have a link to a song on YouTube or is that classed as advertising another site. I never meant to intentionally break the rules, so I'm just checking before I put on another link.

[Leary]

So I've lurked for a long time and never joined but I read lots of threads and feel like I know some of you ladies real well! What caused me to post is BabyFever. Getting that drunk after so many BFP's? That just didn't mesh with how bad you seem to want to be pregnant so badly and then I saw your siggy with the year "2003" as the year of your 19w loss, and again, something didn't seem right and this quote from you explained why: ,

"I havn't fallen pregnant again yet after the recent loss I had But, I do know its scary I lost a baby at 19 W exactly over 3 years ago and Its been hard everytime I fell pregnant I was always afraid to see the nightmear I had happen. I know its hard to hear and say to yourself try to relax. But sometimes when you stress out more its not good on the baby nor you either..."

Could be a typo, but I would think you, of all people would remember the date of such a horrible, horrible experience. I know I do, down to the second, and will never ever forget that second, minute, hour, day, month, and especially year that has changed me forever!

Sorry ladies for just jumping in here. I'm sure it looks strange to everyone that a stranger just pops up even though I feel like I've grown close to so many of your stories over the past couple of months. I will delete this post if I am causing trouble or offending anyone. I've just been burnt a few times and all kinds of things can happen on the internet.

[Toccara50]

Hey jen jen yeah my DH comes home every weekend ... he got sick on friday so I had to take care of him all weekend I hope him being sick don't effect his training ...

[Babyfever2007]

Leary- I lost my baby exactly in 2003 in January, And I had another loss that I lost 3 years ago 2006 that I did not put in my siggy. I remember every waking detail to my losses and will never forget them. I was almost going to be 17 so I was about 16 1/2 when I lost my first child & then my second was 3 years ago. With your siggys being able to only have so much to hold because of the guidelines I had to make get as much as possible in before I got cut off. With me going to post my HCG numbers tomorrow I wanted to make sure I could get my angel babies in. I had 2 wonderful full term pregnancies shortly after my first two losses, then I had 3 losses this year.

I think I'm going to go ahead an go MIA for awhile till the tread calms down. I had already apologized for my mistakes and cried all night that night and tonight once again for it.. .All, I can is say sorry for all the hearts I broke. No ones perfect and I know I sure am not perfect & never will be. I really regret that night, And I totally cannot take it back but wish I could. I feel like crawling in a whole now because I feel so bad. I now feel like the worst parent in the world..

Anna-Its Sunday here, Its 10:29 PM atm..