TTC After Miscarriage or Loss June 07

[Leyla]

Hi Ladies,

Well, I've completely lost track of where everyone is at after the thread change... Have also been off the radar too so that does not help. Therefore I must apologise for the terrible lack of personals.

Hope that everyone is doing well and all the preg girls are coming along nicely!

Salt - Hey cycle buddie. I have to admit that I've been stalking your chart a little bit and it looks fab!! Nice implantation dip there!!! I'm so sure that you are preg this month... have you been having any symptoms??? Do tell...

I'm now 10 dpo and think I might be heading for a triphasic chart. But FF has not told me so yet. Will just have to see how the next few days pan out. It's my birthday later in the week so it would be such a fab birthday gift to get a BFP. Trying not to get my hopes up too much though...

Big hugs to all you other lovely people, I hope that you have enjoyed a nice relaxing weekend and all treated yourselves well.

love

[cheekyfrog]

Some fine looking charts cropping up here! (looks at Leyla and winks )

I'm very keen to be joining you all again. I want to be sharing the countdowns to O and the joys (lol) of the TWW. Come on, AF!!!! Making me wait eight weeks is just not on!!

Meeting up with Belinda for lunch yesterday was lovely! Another reason why I love BB! Fingers crossed Belinda and I will be bellybuddies again one day (just gotta get my cycle sorted first).

Good luck to everyone ramping up to O and in the TWW. Thinking of you!!

[Leyla]

Thanks Kerry.... but it looks like I spoke too soon. Had big temp drop today.
Hope that AF comes quickly so you can try again soon.

love

[zionsmom]

I got my 2nd AF today!!!! I know its dumb to be happy about that but I am happy because I was right after all, I thought maybe I ovulated late and I sure did so now my cycle is right back to what it was before the pregnancy/miscarriage. I just thought I would post real quick since I had asked some questions of you lovely ladies.

How is everyone else out there????

[Bun]

zionsmum - yay on AF arriving!

Leyla - you never know, one weird wacky temp doesn't mean much. Wait and see what tomorrow brings!

kerry - I reckon AF will be along pretty soon now, looking at your chart.

satya - I hope you don't have to wait too long for your op - it doesn't look like it will be too bad. I can't remember what you said about apples now - at the time my head was in a bit of a spin and not much was computing! Now that the m/s is getting worse, my head is ready for any useful info to keep it at bay!

las - how are you going? So sorry to hear your news. I have my fingers crossed that you will surprise them and this little one will make it!

megsmum - I'm glad to hear that the news has sunk in a little now. It can take a while to process these things. I think that you probably are O'ing, but the clomid will increase your progesterone which helps the embie to implant properly, and will also increase your LP which also helps to prevent an early loss. It all sounds really positive to me, and I hope your first cycle on clomid brings success to you like it did to me!

shoegal - woo hoo on AF!!!!

Salt - I get really vivid dreams when pg, so maybe it is a good sign for you! I hope so! How are you going? When do your parents have the op?

Pash - how are you going? My first m/c was a missed m/c. I was 8.4 wks but bub had passed at 7wks. I had a drug to induce a m/c as I didn't want surgery, so in the end I got to see it all as if it was a natural m/c. The membranes you have described was one of the things I saw, but there was also lots of clots, and very thick blood, and then lastly the actual 'baby', which looked like a long thick bit of red tissue. Because I had drugs, and they didn't work properly the first time, so I had to have another lot, it went on for 11 days, so not sure how long it would usually take naturally. I was also really surprised to hear that the bub had passed at the scan, as I still had symptoms and my clothes had started to get too tight too. I don't want to scare you - just telling you my experience. Please remember that it is v common for twins to m/c or to lose one but for the other one to be as happy as larry. I hope it works out for you this time. Let us know how you are going.

Well, I had my first spew on Fri night and have come v close again a couple of times over the w/e. My folks came around for dinner last night and I was feeling soooo ill, it was really hard to keep it from them. I said I had a headache. We had the most boring w/e. I really don't feel up to much and slept most of yesterday. I am starting to get 'classic' m/s from Fri, where it gets bad whenever my stomach is empty, but I keep leaving it too long to prepare food because I am too tired, that I feel sick and am then too sick to prepare food. And poor DH has been copping it. He made me a ginger tea the other night but put in so much ginger it was actually hot - like really spicey hot, yuck!!! I am not really sure what to do with ginger, but bought some the other day. I also got heaps of ginger nut biccies. I phoned the clinic on Fri to say I didn't want to have my BT and all the nurses were busy so I left a msg. I was waiting for them to ph and hassle me, but they didn't! I know that I am supposed to have my first scan this week, but I am not sure if they will ph to arrange it or if I should ph them and ask? I am kind of happy not knowing when it will be, as then I will start stressing! Right now I am quite calm, which I am enjoying. I know my OB will do a scan at my first appointment in 2 wks time, but that is only 3 days before our holiday, so I need to have a scan before then to check all is well so I have time for a D & C and recovery if it's not looking good. So I guess I need to get onto them in the next couple of days if they don't contact me.

[Lee]

Hi lovely ladies,

Hope you all enjoyed your weekends and slept in if you could!

Salt - I broke out in a couple of really big awful pimples at 10dpo, I thought it could have been AF aswell - but it obviously wasn't!! I remember talking about BFZ (big fat zits lol at the time!!). And now my skin is looking really nice and clear with a rosie glow (although thats probably the zero degress in Tasmania!!). Do you normally break out with AF? Anyway, pimples is a good sign - hooray!! I tested negative at 10dpo, as well as a definate negative 12dpo. It wasn't until 14dpo that I got a faint positive. I guess I just wanted to see if I was one of those lucky people that gets a positive result as early as 10dpo - I wasn't, never mind! So, how long do you think you will wait before testing!! I didn't really have any symptoms Salt, other than I just didn't feel like AF was on her way - you know that slightly "off" feeling you can get, a bit of cramping etc - well it never came, just a few pimples and then a bfp! Fingers crossed for you Salt!

Bun - you poor thing. I had m/s really awful with my 3 children/pregnancies. It really changes your life and what you can achieve. There's not much you can do about it, but ride the wave and have very low expectations of yourself. The one thing I thought helped me was to eat Minties, must have been the chewing effect and the taste of mint - when I couldn't stomach food, I could eat a mintie or two! You sound really well though, and you are inching your way forward!!

Pash - I've wondered about you many times over the last few days. How are you? We all are concerned and want to know what's happening with you. Big hugs Pash, and praying all is settling down and will be fine.

Satya - hi!! How're doing? Did you O?? And now for another 2WW, blah! I wonder if you will be pg this cycle, did putting a plan in place ease some pressure somewhere?? Hugs.

Hello to everyone else and I'm hoping for a few more BFP this week from you lovely ladies.



As for little me, I've had an up and down few days. Been thinking about my little man who died in March. Just had one of the midwifes from his birth visit me again. They are all in disbelief that he died of pneumonia. I'm sure it would be easier for the hospital to deal with had it been a simple SIDS case, i.e. no concern for any negligence issues. I won't go into it all, but it's all very depressing, and has been on my mind.

And I feel even stranger being pregnant again - like I have so much "unfinished" business from my last baby, it makes it harder to focus on this new one. And I'm worried to think about a new baby so much yet, in case something goes wrong. It's all so hard.

And to top it off, my other 2 kids (aged 9 and 7) were having a video chat with their interstate cousins yesterday. One of my sisters in law had a baby a few months before my little boy was born/died. Well, she came to my baby's funeral and I have not heard from her since (over 3 months ago). Yesterday she put her baby boy's face right up to the Webcam, so it literally was "in my face". Honestly, it felt like a dagger through my heart, and I walked away. It just feel this was so damm insensitive - to shove your baby into the face of a lady whose baby died 3 months ago. It's not something I would ever do, and the image keeps popping into my mind. Sorry for the ramble, but had to get that out. Incredible how many people just don't get it, not even a little bit. You'd think it would be a bit of common sense at the very least.

Anyway, I feel fine physically, just tired. I don't feel pg really. I hope to avoid the m/s this time. I did another HPT on Saturday, and the 2nd line is very very dark, as dark as the control line. So that tells me my hormone levels are on the rise.

Hugs to all!

Lee xoxoxoxo

[timnik77]

Hello to everyone, been away from here for a couple of days - so much to catch up on and a new thread and all!

Pash - any news yet? Why is your doctor not doing more for you, even a scan to see what maybe happening? Fingers crossed for you that it will all be ok. My first m/c was 11.5 weeks and it was a small amount of spotting one week before I got a little more about 5 days later then the next morning I woke up and it was a massive gush of blood that lasted for hours. I had cramping a bit like a period pain that seemed to come in waves too. With the second one though I was only 7 weeks and it was continuous spotting for a couple of days, bit like a period with the same sort of period cramps. Please keep us updated, I am thinking of you.

las - how about yourself? any more news?

megsmum - I am on my second cycle of clomid and sounds like we have similar issues going on. I am hoping that the clomid sorts me out, the BT done on cd21 last month was really positive showing that I had o'd and the hormone levels were all good. Few side affects but I think it is worth it if it works. Good luck to you!

salt - looking good for a BFP this month, fingers crossed for you.

Sorry to people I have missed, hello to everyone. I have been madly Bding with DH all week in the hope that we will get a sticky bub this month. Things are bad when all you can think about whilst in the act is making those spermies swim and find the egg!

So now in the TWW, which I think must be the slowest part of the whole month because it is just a matter of waiting until you can test! I have very sore bb's which is a good sign, not really noticing anything else yet to give me hope. I'm sure it is far too early.

My sister had her 12 week scan, all is well there. She is getting bad depression and doesn't seem too interested in being pg which I find extremely frustrating. I'm sure she doesn't realise how lucky she is that she fell so easily, she seems to think being pg is all a bit too much of an inconvenience! Crazy! Oh well each to their own I guess...

Hope everyone is having a good week and getting some of this glorious rain that is falling here at the moment.

[claireabel]

Hi gals

I've been out of town for a few days and have missed a bit - you lot can talk!!

Salt and Leyla, i reckon both your charts look fabulous, i'm expecting good news later this week! Salt, yes, i was crampy before my BFP and for about a week and a half afterwards. Leyla, I wouldn't read too much into that temp drop, it's still so high.

Pash - how are you hun? I haven't had a natural m/c so don't know what it's like. I guess all i can say is hang in there. as the others have said, bleeding is common and you do have a good chance that things will go very well. Let us know how you go, i'm thinking of you. i'm glad you've got such good support at work too.

Princess confused, some docs tell you to wait a cycle or two after m/c but mine didn't, and i fell preg again right afterwards.

Bun, the m/s sounds very promising! have you heard about your scan yet? good luck, things sound like thy're going great.

Las - i'm sorry to hear your news, what a rollercoaster of emotions. is the 100 you're talking about the HCG level? if so, try to have hope, there is such a huge degree of 'normal' in HCG. Many successful pregs have very low HCG - check out www.betabase.info. good luck with the next round of bloods.

Lee - cannot believe your SIL! my god, that's unbelievable. some people just have no compassion or common sense. have you got someone to talk to about your feelings? i hope you've got lots of support out there in the real world, what you're going through is very hard.

TimNik - things sound very promising for you too. wow, so many 2WWs coming up, i really hope you all get the good news you deserve.

Satya -

I'd already had to endure the going to buy her a present and the baby shower we had at lunch time for her.... and the comment from a work colleage something like..... come on Satya you need to get pregnant so you can get all these presents. She also knew about the m/c and how I am seeing a specialist, and how I have to have the op and still she says something like this. She also knows I tried unsuccessfully for many years with my ex.... how could she be so insensitive. Twice yesterday I wanted to burst into tears.... I don't know how I didn't but somehow I kept strong and it just didn't happen.

Incredible. she deserves a good slap, some people say the stupidest things.

Nothing really new with me. still an emotional mess but trying to be positive, as you just never know. i'll be 7 weeks tomorrow and am having a scan again next monday, for 8 weeks. even though i know statistically there's a bigger chance of m/c between now and next week, it's the week or two after that i'm dreading, as that's when i lost the baby last time.

i went to syd on the weekend as my sis bought me tix to swan lake for my birthday. the guy in front of us proposed to his girlfriend with the biggest diamond i've ever seen (we stalked her after the show to get a look!). i love seeing moments like that - a little bit of drama!

other than that, DH came home with a book on first-time fatherhood, which sent me into emotional tears. i just want him to get to be a dad. we told his parents tonight and i'm glad they know, but feel a little vulnerable i guess having the news out there. his mum is terminally ill, so i feel very hopeful that she will get to meet her grandchild before she dies, the m/c was so disappointing for her and i just hope she will be around in another 7 months (and i hope there's a baby for her to meet in 7 months).

better get on to dinner, speak to you all soon. x

[Lee]

Salt - I felt a tiny bit crampy, and had a few "twinges", which felt like movement in the uterus area, before my +tive. I'm for you this cycle, it seems to have come around quickly this time!

Claireabel - thanks, I did get some counselling, which to be honest I found not so useful. I didn't get much out of being told "take one day at a time" and "some things just happen". I know that sounds a bit cynical. I'm a fairly spiritual person, but even that side of me has been tested to the extreme. I know my grief is something I have to live with, and I also know that the only way to survive it is to live well, to live a fantastic life - to live the life my son cannot I owe him this. Still, it's a huge amount of sadness to live with, and I sort of cram it into tight spots wherever I can. I've decided to steer clear of negative people in my life too, no room for them!! Hope your scan goes well, it'll be so nice for you to see that little bubs heartbeat!!

Lee xo

[satya]

Hi everyone

Zionsmum - Glad you are so happy about your AF arriving - completely the opposite to me - it always sends me rock bottom.

Bun - The m/s apple thing that I saw in the mag was eat half an apple before you even get out of bed then you have a light breakfast and then eat the other half of the apple. The woman who wrote about it said it had helped several generations of her family through morning sickness so it's probably worth a try.

Salt - Fingers crossed that this is your lucky month.

Lee - that webcam incident must have been just awful. It is unbelievable how insensitive people can be.

Claire - Your pregnancy is probably giving your MIL an extra reason to live and therefore prolonging her life somewhat.



Well it's CD16 for me and it appears that I have not Od yet. I've never O'd this late before. The longest cycle I can ever remember (apart from my pg ones) was 29 days and that was immediately after my m/c, before it I was 28 days almost every time and never over 28 days. Since the m/c my cycles have been 29 days, 26 & 24 days in sequence.

I've had no O pains this cycle but have had them every cycle since the m/c. I don't know if I had them normally before the m/c as I was not obsessed with getting pregnant back then. My CM no longer looks fertile, more lotion like and my temp has not gone up. If I have O'd today there's very little chance that I'll be pg this cycle as we haven't BD'd since Friday night.... we've both been too tired. Can't wait to do my temp in the morning.... I'm very curious to see if it's gone up..... hopefully not and then the BDing tonight will do the trick.

[zionsmom]

Satya~ I was a tad disappointed but I was happy because my cycle has returned back to normal and that also means that I was right about when I ovulated. We are now ACTIVELY trying to conceive starting on our 1 year anniversary. I really HOPE that you hit it right on this cycle! This could be your month.

Lee~ I am sure sorry about your sister in law, it really annoys me when people just don't think! People who haven't gone through this just can never understand.

Clariebell~ I know you must be so nervous, I get nervous just thinking about being in that place again. But you will be fine and I can't wait to hear the good news I will be checking in to see how your us goes.

Timnick~ It already seems so positive thats great!!! I am sorry about your sister feeling that way, that always bothers me as well. But can't wait until your TWW is over so we can hear the news.

[cherie26]

Hi everyone!
Just a quick question? I am temping and forgot this morning to take it before I got up so do I take it as soon as I remember an hour later or do I just wait until tomorrow morning to take it and miss a day?

Salt- Your chart is looking great! Temps are still up I am getting excited for you! I got crampy before both my pregnancies like af was coming but it never did.

Satya- I am at the same point as you and have even been using those opk's and still negative at CD 17! I have been BDing so much just in case that by the time O does come around I wont feel like it anymore! Since My mc I have noticed o pains and had spotting and I never had any of that before my mc or like you said you just were not as obsessed as before so maybe I did but didn't notice. Hopefully we will both get our BFP this cycle! I am sorry the people at your work are so insensitve, I think I would have lost it by now and given a piece of my mind (I tend to be a little too forward so my husband says!) Still if this is making you feel unhappy at work I would pull her aside and tell her it is upseting you and not to make it a topic of conversation at any point with you anymore. Anyway I hope it all gets better for you soon especially with your upcoming lap.

Zionsmum- I felt exactly like you because you feel as if you have a starting point again and a proper chance at getting pregnant because that AF finally came when it was supposed to! Good luck this cycle!

I cant believe how many people in here are pregnant now looking at all those pretty preg tickers I Want one to. Hopefully soon!

[Lee]

Pash - hope you are okay. Let us know. We are all thinking of you and praying that you are fine.

Lee xoxo

[kiwigirl]

Hi everyone,

Been reading your messages and thinking of you all. I wrote a long message with personals the other day but lost it due to my computer crashing arghhhhh. I'm doing well.. can't wait till we go away on Thursday night.. so needing a break!!!!!

Pash - How did it go this morning? *hugs*

cherie - I'd record it anyways but make a note that it's at a different time. If you're doing this on Fertility Friend there's an option for this.. if you're doing it on paper maybe just put a star by the date?

zionsmom - I understand feeling happy with 2nd AF coming, especially since my 2nd one was way more normal.. makes you feel reassured that things are still working how they should. So my cycle buddy, hopefully this month is our month too!!!

Hi to everyone else... next time I'll do more personals!!

[zionsmom]

Cherie~ You hit it right on! Everything my doctor told me was right on as well. They said I would get my 1st period 4-8 weeks and I got it 4 weeks exactly . Then they said my 1st period would be a little off and that my 2nd one would be more normal and that was exactly right too. Before I thought I would get my period the 10th of June but I sensed that I ovulated the beginning of june and when I got my period I knew I was right about when I ovulated and that just makes me feel sooooo positive. My doctor also told me that she would bet anything I would get pregnant 3-6 mos. from my miscarriage and that it would be great and fine. She has been right on with everything so why not this??? I know she doesn't know the future but it helps give me a little bit of hope right now. So fingers crossed for this month!!!!! Sorry if I gave you toooo much info. about me.

KIWIGIRL~ You are my buddy!!!!! We have been right on together all along and I just have a GREAT feeling that we will go through a pregnancy together. Its just a gut feeling but we will be in pregnancy thread very very soon! I can't thank you enough for making me feel unalone.


Really, thank you very much to everyone. All of you ladies have all had obstacles and when you care enough to care about me in any way shape or form it makes me want to cry because its just so hard. So thank you to every single one of you ladies.

[Bun]

Hi girls,

Zionsmum - it's great to hear you sounding so positive about things! I hope your dr is right and you are pg with a healthy little one in no time!

pash - how are you??

satya - thanks for the m/s remedy. I will have to try it. I am eating an apple right now and it seems to be going ok. I have been struggling with brekky lately and it takes me ages to get it all down, so it would be nice to be feeling a little better in the mornings! How frustrating on not O'ing yet, when you usually would have by now. I swear our bodies like to test us sometimes!

Lee - you must have so much to deal with right now. Being pg again must be bringing back so many emotions about your darling boy. I can't believe your SIL - that is so incredibly insensitive. I think it is a good idea to surround yourself with positive, supportive people right now. You don't need people like that making a hard time even more difficult with their insensitivity.

Claire - I hear you on being an emotional mess! I am all over the place!

las - how are you going?

Salt - I got bad skin around the time of my BFP. It was awful - hadn't seen it like that in a long time. Thankfully it seems to be clearing up now. The only other symptoms I got were sore bbs and some v slight cramping, but it only lasted for a few seconds every now and then. Your chart is looking pretty good to me! I would so love for you to get a BFP this cycle. When do you think you will test? I am not sure when I will tell my parents, but my plan is not to tell anyone until after the 12 week scan, preferrably later. I would rather wait until it is too obvious to ignore, as it is just too scary telling people and worrrying about un-telling them and then dealing with the v inappropriate reactions we got from most people. I guess I will see how we go.

I have a Q for all the girls who have had a D & C - what is the recovery time like? And how long afterwards can you fly o/s? I am so petrified that this one is not going to make it, and I am really scared that we will not be able to go on our holiday because I will not be allowed to fly or will be recovering from a m/c. I have finally booked my first scan at the FS clinic for next Mon at 7am (I figure I won't sleep anyway, so the earlier the better, and they only do them in the early morning before most people head off to work). We leave on 12 July. I am really scared that we will find out it has died at my first OB appointment on the 9th, as there is no way I would have time to recover if things go wrong then. I am more stressed about this holiday than looking forward to it - it just makes things more complicated. I would not have agreed to go, but the FS said it was fine, and DH kept hassling me so we finally just went for it. My anxiety levels are getting pretty bad and the near constant nausea is not helping reassure me that all is ok, although I know it should. I went to bed at 8pm last night and couldn't sleep with the nausea and sore bbs, but still it doesn't reassure me! Sorry to be so neurotic and unappreciative guys, I am just finding this so scary and I am so emotional right now. I wish I could have a few days off work, but I can't and people are starting to notice that I have been leaving early and coming in late...

[kiwigirl]

Hi I am a bit freaking out a bit right now.. went to a business lunch with a group of people and suddenly realised I was bleeding!!! Excused myself to the bathroom to discover I'd gushed out quite a bit in one go (great). It stopped pretty much straight away but I have no idea what on earth that was all about??? I'm CD11 and have never had this sort of thing happen to me before. Any ideas???

[cherie26]

Bun
My recovery time from the D&C was really only a day. I had no pains or discomfort just bleeding. I am pretty sure you can still travel after.
I know it seems hard right now but things will get better you still have strong syptoms and thats a great sign! Just keep reminding yourself that there is a living baby right now growing inside you wanting to meet you because you are its mother. I know in my heart this baby is coming home with you.