TTC after Miscarriage or Loss ~ April 08 #2

[mmteacher]

Hey Everyone!

Sorry it's been awhile for me-just lots of craziness going on...
AF came this weekend right on time which I guess is good because I can't start taking Clomid again this week and hope for a BFP. Obviously O'ing on my own didn't work out so well for me last month. Also, don't know what it has been like for all of you the first month after m/c but AF has been AWFUL-super terrible cramps and medication doesn't help...they lead to migraines and then the migraines make me sick to my stomach-YUCK! Hopefully I have seen the worst of it! On a good note, DH was very sweet this weekend and cuddled with me and took care of me-not always usual for him! Anyhow, looks like I'll be starting Clomid on Wednesday and hopefully we?ll get lucky the first time with it again, but after almost 18 months of trying I am not sure...I have decided that the TWW is really the worst time of the month for me as I wish the days away and am consumed by every possible thought of being pg-I am going to try VERY hard this month to let go during the TWW and remember to keep living instead of being so darned focused on what I can't control! When I had my m/c this little poem from when I was a kid came to mind and it has been helping me keep going and put this in bigger hands than my own...hope it helps a few of you!

Broken Dreams

As children bring their broken toys
With tears for us to mend,
I brought my broken dreams to God
Because He was my friend.
But then instead of leaving Him
In peace to work alone,
I hung around and tried to help
With ways that were my own.

At last I snatched them back and cried,
"How could you be so slow"
"My child," He said, "What could I do?
You never did let go."

Let go and let God
Author Unknown

Congrats to the BFP's and GL relaxing to the TWW's! More persies later!

MMteacher

[maybe baby]

Hi Jenushka

Your story is like mine. Lovely healthy h/b at 7 weeks (158) and then a missed miscarriage at 10 weeks. NO signs, nothing,. Also, like you, I have a beyond gorgeous DD who is the light of my life and does a lot to life my heart which is still down in my shoes most of the time.

JMG, I know what you mean about keeping quiet. I guess I was naive, I thought a h/b and a healthy looking bub at 7 weeks was good enough to tell some people. Never again. Too bad what people think, I will be keeping way quiet until I absolutely have to. And it will happen again. I am telling myself I will have another baby every night before I go to sleep

Part of it still seems so unreal. One moment, you are in an office with yr OB being handed hospital documentation and other things, the next you have goop on your stomach and are staring at a screen with nothing on it and you are whisked into a hospital to have a D&C.

Part of it still feels so unreal. How can this be?

Much baby dust to all