jenushka.....Hun... there are no real answers.... no words we can say will make it alright..... it sucks.... you know it, i know it.... we all know it..... and to say it sucks is the politest way to put it.......

how do you deal with it.......the only answer i can give is ONE DAY AT A TIME..... the days right now will be cloudy and vauge.... then sometime, hopefully soon, the fog will lift just a bit and then a bit more and then a bit more until one day you will be able to see again....

Do whats right for you right now hun... allow your emotions... allow your sorrow, your anger, your frustrations, your fear...... all of your emotions.. alow them all..... dont hold it in... cry... scream... yell... whatever you have to do to deal with it.

ONE DAY AT A TIME HUN...... ONE DAY AT A TIME