Avalanche you have just given me a wonderful idea, if and when I get pregnant I am going to write in a journal every day about my experiences, thoughts and feelings. Although it will be for me not for my baby (I dont think the bub will want to know its Mummy was a nutcase when pregnant), I think it would be a great way to get your fears and sadness, and also happiness, out of your head by putting it on paper and hopefully work through them to TRY and create a somewhat positive experience. Thanks for that