Trying to Conceive after Still Birth/ Late Loss/Recurrant Miscarriage ~ December 2008
If you have found yourself in this forum you no doubt have had a painful journey. TTC after recurrent miscarriage/stillbirth or Late Loss takes special courage and support. The aim of this forum is to provide a place where women who have endured loss can share their stories, friendships, treatments and triumphs!
My greatest wish is that you all leave this forum with nice big fat positives in the shortest possible time!!!
I hope so much that this month is YOUR month.
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Fllowerchild
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Alternately you may contact Kelly (however she may take a little longer to respond at times!).
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Yay I am the first up!! Thank you all for your well wishes, the surgery went well they ended up putting me under a GA not a spinal, which made me quite ill. I have never been sick from a general before but I think the not eating when I am pregnant is a huge no no for me, and then my blood pressure plummeted so every time I tried to sit up I got dizzy and threw up (sorry TMI). Spent all day yesterday trying to rest as I still had a huge headache, fair bit of cramping which thankfully has now gone, I still have spotting though, can't wait for that to go too. So I am glad it is over, but now I have moved onto the 'OMG I hope I don't end up with an infection' faze! I am also not allowed to lift anything heavier than 4 kilos which is going to be REALLY hard!!!!! It is Corey's 2nd birthday today, so we have just had a friend over to play and now I am buggered.
Issy02 - Welcome to our lovely bunch of ladies, you will find this a great place to let your emotions flow and no one will judge you.
Hi to everyone, I will do personals later there is so much to catch up on, and I need to go for a snooze!
Wow Helen, that's full on. I would be throwing a pity party for myself and whining David's ears off. The lengths you are going through for you bub! Take care.
Diana, I'll hug you and you hug me :-) Not as good as a cuddle from a boys but a hug always helps. I cried all over one of my work mates today while explaining why I'm not finding much Christmas cheer this year. You all feel the same, I know.
Owwwwwwwwwwwwwww, I'm having horrible cramps. I don't usually cramp. I don't remember getting cramps before my last pregnancy. Is this AF coming or still possible BFP?
Last edited by Hammi; December 5th, 2008 at 01:49 PM.
My point about "wasting their time" at the birthing ward is that they don't have to agree to see me. Which is exactly what they did -- when I called they told me to stay home and wait. I have to get ahold of my midwife again today to tell her that they didn't think it was as serious as she did. Basically, the norm with Swedish health care seems to be to try to get you to stay home and leave them alone whenever they can, and since the birthing ward doesn't have access to my journal where blinking red letters say "don't f*** with this girl again!" I figured they would be dumb and not tell me to come in. It doesn't do much for my already growing fear that my next unnecessary experience with incompetent nurses and doctors will be right there in that ward...
Really good to hear that the op went well Helen, must be difficult not being able to pick your son up, but so important to rest, great news!
Tildy, how frustrating for you. can you just turn up to the hospital (try & pick a quiet time) and just say you want a scan on the recomendation of your midwife & due to medical history? In the mean time true to be at peace, I'm sure bub is fine, did the sugar hit help get him/her moving?
Hey Cindee, haven't heard from you in a bit, how are you?
Must go, more later.
Last edited by Berry1; January 10th, 2009 at 03:26 AM.
Hey Girls, just checking in quickly. Sounds like everyone is starting to get emotional about xmas. I know I've been finding it tough. On top of that 2 girls who I work closely with a due any day now. I had 1 baby shower yesterday and another next week. They are both gorgeous ladies and I am completely happy for them but also completely sad for myself. I think I am going to try and get out of next weeks, even though it is my boss. It is all just a bit much hearing people talk about that beautiful smell of newborns and the joy of turning round and seeing bub in the car seat on that first trip home from hospital and... welll... I don't need to say anymore to you girls.
Otherwise I'm feeling good and just hope that together we can hug each other through a really tough time of year that we have to survive without our beautiful babies to love, hold and adore.
Thank God for little Anna, I just keep picturing us all in Katie's shoes this time next year, still missing our bubs like crazy but welcoming new little ones to our lives. fingers crossed!
Helen - I am so happy to hear your scan went so well today! And yay for the cervix I would totally understand you getting nervous sooner than your next scan. I was the one who pushed my ob to let me have my last scan at 21 weeks, only 2 weeks after my morphology one and that was due to how fast things happened last time around and I wanted to check on my cervix at the same gestation as when Luke was lost. So, will your next scan work in to be roughly the same with you? It might help ease your mind if you can time it that way (or a few days before)?
Where is Laney? I am getting worried now. Hope you are just busy being happy and that you can update us soon.
Paula - you are so not being a "cow" debating the gender issue. I know that next time (gosh, if I can bring myself to go through this stress again) we would be hoping for a boy - (a) because it would be nice to have one of each grow up together, and (b) I would hate to think that Luke might be our only son. I can't really explain that too well but hopefully you know what I mean. Of course you will love each child no matter what gender they turn out to be but at the same time I don't think we have to justify our feelings about this just because we have lost a child. Those who haven't get to debate the issue and openly admit to wanting a particular gender and we can too. I think though that we will all (or currently do) cherish our little ones just a little more than those who have never walked in our shoes if that makes sense. Gee hope that hasn't sounded offensive to anyone as I didn't mean it like that
Theresa I am sorry I didn't congratulate you in my last post on your engagement! So, CONGRATULATIONS!!! What a great start to your year and hopefully the first of much happiness to come your way as the year goes on.
Diana - yay for the 15 days pg. All this talk of doing the deed - can't remember the last time DH and I got jiggy! We were watching something on tv last night and a sexy scene came on and I looked at DH and said "maybe someday we will get to do that again". Sigh...so you girls TTC, go for it!!
Sending a massive hello to everyone else and sorry to those I missed. I am sitting up to type this which is a change and my back is now killing me. I'll be back tomorrow to let you all know how my u/s goes.
theresa- congrats on your engagement i can remember how excited i was when dh and i got engaged.
helen- yahoo for a great scan
afm we are just enjoying dtd without any pressure of ttc at the moment . I think poor dh never thought that this time would come again. Still waiting for af to come which will all happen in good time.angellukesmum can totally relate to the one day comment as i bled through most of my pregnancy we never really ever had the chance to dtd. Well i'm looking at going back to work again next week at the moment not sure if i will return to my old job or if it is time for a fresh start somewhere, am looking at maybe getting a less manual job so that when we do start ttc again i wont have to worry about what i can and can't do especially if we have to go down the ivf track again. i guess i will wait and see. big belly rubs to all the pregnant girl and fingers crossed for the girls ttc.
Hi Ladies, sorry that I didn't post lastnight. Thank you for thinking of me. Yesterday was pretty emotional for me and I tried to spend it relaxing. The appt was okay, not great. Our little man was wiggling and kicking through the whole thing (and playing with his little boy parts). It was too difficult for the doctor to really tell me if he was behind in growth or not. Some things measures ahead a few days and some things measured behind a few days. All of the measurements added up to being right around my due date. He has been ahead a few days in most of the recent scans so it does worry me. To me, I see that as he is behind a couple of days in growth, deffinitly not a week like I had feared. My doctor said that he measured perfectly and there is no way at this point to be exact with measurements but it is difficult for me to feel so positive yet. My doctor pretty much yelled at me and said that he is measuring exact with the early and most accurate scan. I have another scan in 2 weeks. That scan will tell us more. I really wanted a clear YES he is growing great but the office scans are not the most accurate. I guess I just have to wait it out and worry a little more.
Jo, I am so glad that you are feeling up to posting. I have really missed you in here. I just hope that you and DH are really ready to be pregnant again when it happens for you. I will warn you that the third time is much much harder than the second for me. The depression has hit me pretty hard and a lot of my relationships have suffered. I think you need to spend some time away with just your DH so you can recover from such a difficult time of year.
Last edited by Laney; January 7th, 2009 at 01:24 AM.
Hey Girls, I've been lurking for a while and thought it was time I made my presence known!
Jo, I was just reading your post about your SIL smoking while she was pg and i completely sympathise with you. It's absolutely heart wrenching when so many people do things they aren't supposed to when they are pregnant and still get away with it, yet others (like all the people here!) do everything by the book and still have their hearts broken. After I had Jayvan I walked out of the hospital and pretty much tripped over a pregnant woman sucking on a fag, If DF wasn't with me I would have took her out I was so furious.
I hope everything has calmed down for your since chrissy, I must say mine wasn't all that flash either ^^;;
Good luck to everyone TTC in 09! I truely hope we're all blessed with precious little christmas presents this year
hey guys!
quick early morning post from me as i had to dive on before i left for work.
Laney - i understand the frustration at not having what you want in better confirmation but it does sound like things are ok! So please breath a mini sigh a relief! (and i know you'll continue to hold your breath anyway!!) I agree with the depression part -i am sure it has been a big part of me hitting a wall over christmas. i thought i was just so sad but then one day i was just like this has to be something greater than just being sad -i have never felt anything like it before.
So that is probably part of my nervousness going again -eventhough i want to. Confidence has been shot and all i know now is pregnancy = heartbreak but i will keep you all updated on the decision DFH and I make. Jan is most likely out for TTC anyway as that would (hopefully) result in a 3rd baby born in Oct and honestly it is hard enough with 2 already. But maybe jan conception is a lucky month for us, who knows! I still have AF so its a no go right now anyway. DS has still been talking about us having another baby and where he would sit in the car if i did. I even had to read "where did i come from?" to him and DD the other night in the cubby house and they then wanted to watch a birth video to see for themselves and onto youtube we went. DS was quite disappointed there were no "screams" as i have told him labour hurts but they were quite fascinated all the same. It was an interesting night. But again, still surprised that a baby is on his mind almost as much as it is on mine, esp when we don't talk about TTC in front of them.
Teagz - glad you posted, although i get the lurking thing too! i wanted to rip my brothers girlfriends eyeballs out i was so upset and angry but saying or doing anything would have caused a really ugly situation. And worse, she is a really lovely person otherwise. hope you find us a supportive bunch in here and i second your 2009 wish!!
hammi - sorry AF reared her ugly head!!! january here you come!!!
hgirs -happy your ultrasound went well! and you got some answers!
paula - no your not a cow! we know what you mean!
gotta go girls! am about 15mins behind schedule! oops!
xxjo
Trying to Conceive after Still Birth/ Late Loss/Recurrant Miscarriage ~ December 2008
I would totally understand you getting nervous sooner than your next scan. I was the one who pushed my ob to let me have my last scan at 21 weeks, only 2 weeks after my morphology one and that was due to how fast things happened last time around and I wanted to check on my cervix at the same gestation as when Luke was lost. So, will your next scan work in to be roughly the same with you? It might help ease your mind if you can time it that way (or a few days before)?
We were watching something on tv last night and a sexy scene came on and I looked at DH and said "maybe someday we will get to do that again". Sigh...so you girls TTC, go for it!!
. I think poor dh never thought that this time would come again. Still waiting for af to come which will all happen in good time.angellukesmum can totally relate to the one day comment as i bled through most of my pregnancy we never really ever had the chance to dtd. Well i'm looking at going back to work again next week at the moment not sure if i will return to my old job or if it is time for a fresh start somewhere, am looking at maybe getting a less manual job so that when we do start ttc again i wont have to worry about what i can and can't do especially if we have to go down the ivf track again. i guess i will wait and see. big belly rubs to all the pregnant girl and fingers crossed for the girls ttc.
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