Kirsty : I am relieved for you that you have some answers but I can totally understand the mixed emotions that you must be feeling. You have done the right thing searching for answers and I hope that these answers give you the strenght and the hope to carry on TTC.
Lynn: the up and the down days just continue babe. I don't mean to tell you that because it happens for all of us, but I know myself I still have days where it all just seems too much. When you just want to feel ok again, not even great, just ok it seems like even that is a struggle. I still say to myself I just want to feel constant. That is the state I aim for. Not unpredictable.....just constant. Hang in there sweetie... PS the poem is beautiful.
Mel: LMAO about the toy clean up. I can just imagine the kids thinking that Santa was on their case. I just love the innocence of children, even if you use it to help clean up the toys. Also with the BD'ing this month, what DH doesn't know won't hurt him
Kerry: Do you like to be called Kerry? Anyway hun how are you? I hope you are having a nice relaxing weekend. You are amazing... I hope you know that.
Well I have left my update to last because I feel really selfish writing about this here. I know that if this does turn out to be a BFP you will be happy for me, but please don't think that I am throwing it in your face. I wish with all my might that each and everyone one of us not only gets a BFP but also gets to hold a gorgeous little earth angel soon. So please, please just know that even if this is a BFP, I don't want to leave the TTC thread yet, so don't kick me out (lol)
Well the line is darker than yesterday but still really feint. I am not even entertaining the thought that it is a +ive. I don't know why, maybe a self defence mechanisim. At the same time I am so excited but I just don't want to get my hopes up just yet. DH and I decided to keep testing until Tuesday when we get to Sydney and if the line keeps getting darker that we will go to a GP that day. Have I done the right thing? I mean I had tests but there are still so many I could have? I feel in my heart that everything will be ok and with the twins from the very begining I had sense of dread. So because I feel different will it be ok? Flowerchild said short LP like mine can cause early loss... Am I about to start bleeding? How early is early? I know I am going on and on but I have such mixed emotions at the moment. I am just really scared. So until Tuesday it is not a BFP, just some weird line on the test. :eek:
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