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Hi Girls
Well we are back and totaly relaxed! Its very late and just popped in to say hi havnt caught up on all the posts but boy you girls can talk!!!!! cant we all born to talk and shop! Sounds like everone is well.
Lynn and Mel Im not sure what to say, your beautiful sites you have created for your darling boys was........Just perfect. I must admit I have tears rolling down my face, you are both wonderful mum's and never ever forget that.
I will post tomorrow and talk then.
Sweet dreams to you all.
P.S I would love to meet up with the Syd girls I will email you later.
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Dream: I'd love to hear about your holiday when you get a chance. I hope you had a fantastic time! Boy am I jealous, we haven't had a proper holiday since our honeymoon 3 1/2 years ago. Always seem too busy but we are really going to have to find the time. It is great that you want to be part of our catch up. I'll let you know the details ASAP - Just email me at Kristy_Greenhatch@hotmail.com
Mel: I'm with the other girls concerning a few cold ones on your birthday. Before I found out I was pregnant with the twins I went to Friday Afternoon Drinks with work and had more glasses of champange then I would like to admit. As you said, your trip to the Gold Coast had absolutely nothing to do with what happened to Nicholas. God knows you deserve the best 30th ever so you go for it girl and enjoy yourself. Oh and if by chance you get a BFP on Wednesday, who cares about the Margaritas, you will be on a high anyway. How is the cramping going? Are you still getting it? I have :crossfingers: for a :bfp: in February.
Lynn: I recon a +ive OPK is a great sign. Are you still getting your BT today? How long will the results take. I know before Cooper your cycle was a little out of whack but after having a child, some womens cycles get a kick start. I really hope this is the case for you, better still I hope for a :bfp: Let us know how your BT goes.
Kerrie: LMAO about your Mum and bubbly, that sounds like my sort of m/s cure. Now that I think of it I really craved beer during my pregnancy. I never drank it but there were some days that I was so desparate for it and I don't really drink it that often when I am not pregnant, go figure.
Bailey: Lol about me being UTD. Don't worry I didn't waste my money on a HPT, I have two left. It makes sense that the support group want to check you out before going. I guess that is a good thing because as you said there are sadly plenty of weirdos out there. I did the same thing as you and went made googleing stillbirth. I read (and saw ) somethings that I wish I hadn't but I am just trying to put them out of my mind. Thanks for being Quality Control, you are a gem.
Well we have an exciting day today. DH's cousin is taking us out on a boat on the Harbour for the afternoon. He had timeshare in a boat. They assure me it is 27ft which isn't like a tinny. I was a bit worried at first being UTD and being on a boat but I grilled DH's cousin and he said that it will be smooth. I didn't tell him I am UTD, I just pretended I get really seasick. Apparenetly it has room to sleep 6 and a bathroom so I guess it will be big enough not to be too rough. We are keeping the pregnancy a secret until 12 weeks. More so because I don't want my family to have to stress all over again, especially my Mum, Dad and my Sister, they have been such wonderful support that I wouldn't want to give the nervous breakdowns. Anyway, I am thinking about doing a website also, I talked to DH because I thought he would want to keep Harry's photos private but he is OK with the idea. I am going to leave it for a while because I am not up to it at the moment but I have been inspired my Lynn and Mel and all the other beautiful sites that you ladies have. I hope everyone had an awesome Australia Day.
Take care my sweets,
Mwah
Spring Angel
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Hi girls,
Sorry it has been sooo long, its a silly time of year for us.
Spring:The boat sounds great, hope the motion and ms doesnt give you a tough time...enjoy. Its nice to have the 12 weeks under the radar, I'm sure when I told people at 12 weeks they sighhhed. The site sounds great it is such a beautiful way to remember your little ones. Mine photos arnt as beautiful as all you wonderful girls. The midwife told me she looked alien like!!
Bailey: Hun I couldnt hold Charlotte it was too hard and like you I had feelings I would nevr be able to give her back. Also whilst I was in labour they kept telling me conflicting stories such as she will be weird looking and I was scared I wouldnt be able to see her beauty. She DH got a quick hold as he accidently walked into my room after I was rushed to theratre and the midwife was wrapping her to take her to the pathologist and she asked he if would like to hold her...she was still alive bearly. I am so pleased he did it makes it easier to live with. Hence the only pics we got were taken by the pathogist they are very sterile.
Mel: I really really really hope all these signs are leading to a BFP, and as for the drinking aspect my fertility specialist use to tell me to go home and have a chardie after IVF so that was always a doctors order. Nicholas's page is beautiful he is such a beautiful angel and son. Us Vic girls should get together too, let me know if anyone is interested. Ohh and happy Birthday if I miss it :)
Lynne:Good luck on the BT, I too think that opk dont give false +'s. I hope everything starts to sort itself out again.
Jo: How beautiful is Briget, I cant believe she is such a big girl. It only seems like yesterday you had her. She must be a brave little muffett to endure the injections.
Nat:Your holiday sounds great so relaxing ...what we all need.
Went and bought a whole heap of opk aparently I am supose to be more fertile now because of the diet..heres hoping :)
Bec
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Hi Everyone,
Nat - welcome back! We've missed you :) Hope you had a great time away. Would love to hear all about it.
Spring - Have a safe fun trip on the boat this afternoon. It looks like a perfect day for it. I would love to see Harrison's website once you have done it. It is just such a wonderful way we can show our precious little angels.
Mel - hope you have fun tonight with your family. Enjoy a drink too! Still got my fingers crossed for you for a BFP.
Bec - good luck with the opk.
Well I went and sat at the pathology place this morning for 2 hours!!! :angry: So I have had my second BT done now so I will stalk my ob on Monday and ring every hour until he has received the results. I am so nervous. I want it to be + so at least I know I am working!!! I don't know what I will do if it is -
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Hi Girls,
Well just sort of caught up with everyone just need to remember who was doing what!
Mel- As Bec said My specl also told me its fine for a couple, implantation happens 7-10 days after O (Day 21-24) so technical the important parts start to develop around the time AF is due & even then its seems between 4-5weeks is the important time and you will know a BFP by then! My God I was 4weeks pregnant with DS skiing and drinking lots of red and snapps to find out when we got home what was going on and he is a very healthly 8yr, mind you with a taste for a good Cab/merlo! Have a drink and enjoy trust me your only 30 once. :crossfingers: for a BFP anyway. Enjoy dinner tonight. Is your birthday on Wednesday? I loved your site for Nicholas......beautiful. You have a very good looking family with you,DH and the kids, I loved Nicholas photo on the wall the most perfect angel of all.
Lynn- Your post just came in while im typing, dont you love all the oldies up there waiting for there blood test a big day out for them! I hope you get a big fat + aleast you know all is going well. Has you OB got you on metformin for the pcos as well as clomid? As I said last night your site to Cooper is just beautiful you girls have done a wonderful job and Cooper would be so happy. The garden is perfect it must be a comfort to be able to sit there and reflect and remember. Is it hot up your way today? I think Im going to jump in the pool after this.
Spring - What a day for the Harbour and a 27ft is not to bad! You will not get much bummpyness on that. Your job sounds very intense I mean the govt and all you should advise that pregnant women need to rest!!! Im glad you didnt have to work yesterday. Im hopeing that you get some m/s soon......just for peace of mind but with DS I had none til about 8weeks so dont worry to much but I understand I always want m/s to the max, sore boobs headpins etcectect!! enjoy today its should be good fun I would love to be out there with you, very jealous!
Bec - At least you have increased your fertility with the diet a very big +. Where are you at with starting to try? Hope you have a great weekend.
Bailey - Im glad to see you here more I hope your are feeling better. Asha is such a pretty name, Im sure she was just a pretty. We all grieve different and deal with situations in our own way, never have regets and by the way you held her the longest ....in your womb and now in your heart forever. I agree sometimes to much info is not good but im just one of those person who just have to know (beside I started do Medicine at uni so Im a little bit like that anyway) But aleast we can question the Drs and make decisions that are good for us and our babies, and you never know find an answer to some of the mystery and find peace in knowing we did all we could. that important.
Jo - Im glad to hear your at home and feeling better it must be so hard with Brigid I hope you have some good help. I sort of feel the same as you......a little jealous I never get to hold or see my babies but with the last five I have great ultarsound photos and cause I have them done from 5weeks I now have a collection till the D day and cause they are around 9 weeks you can see some of there faces outlined so I sort of have something. Which makes me feel a little better. I just wish we could all have shown our babies photos like everone else, and have them as well.
Kirsty - Im glad you got the op over with I hope you get some answers and a big fat BFP soon. Have a great weekend.
Clare - Hows that m/s going? ginger is also good for m/s there is also a blackmores morning sickness tablet that is suppost to be very good. Anyway I hope things improve soon.
Well we had a wonderful time away it felt like we have been away for 2weeks, it was adventure packed. I killed a baby brown snake that just would not leave, even after we scared it off three times so with the kids we had to get rid of it, saw a shark and out in the boat one day we saw the helicopters picking up the water and dumpping it on the fires there were right above us, at one stage we had to move the boat as we were in the way!!!! We drank heaps, ate even more so now I have to get rid of the 5kilos from hoildays before the next 20!!!!!! Anyway we had a great time the kids had a ball and we are back in time for school to start. I feel the year is about to start for me when school is back... back to the routine. This is our last month of trying so Im hopeing something will happen Ive booked into to acupuncture on Monday. Anyway I think Im getting close to the longest post so I'll be off have a wonderful weekend be safe and I talk to you all later on, know wonder im hungry its lunch time!!!
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Mel & Lynn your websites are very special ... I copied others too - I found out by googling stuff or seeing some elsewhere too.
Sometimes we can only put memory things in our gallery becasue our photos are too special to share but I love Nicholas's photo and Copper's hand/foot prints. Brought tears to my eyes.
I have that little angel statue too - the garden is lovely.I think Jo's idea for those renting is great. A few large planters and a statue yuo can move with you.
I think the most special thing is the guestbook because people will write things they won't say in some cases.They can also read our emotion in the journal, share our peoms and see what others write ... like others who have lost their own angels and gain a deeper understanding IYKWIM.
Spring - congratulations on being UTD - and I will keep you in my thoughts.It is a very tumultuous time filled with bittersweet memories and new fears as well as the old ones.
The support group where I go has a few pregnant ladies - they don't come all the time though... I went until my last month before I was due. I stopped then because 1. I didn't want to make it hard for anyone new and 2.It was hard for me too.
Our support group doesn't ask any questions or screen anyone - we haven't had any (m) weirdos.It isn't SID & Kids because they wouldn't let one lady finish the course as she was BFing and still is 2 yrs later.
We have a social worker who is lovely but she just (brings tissues) mainly sits there and says ..." welcome - lets go round and introduce ourselves if you want" and ... then 2 hrs later "it is time to wrap this up -dpes anyone have anything they wish to say ? but you half hour more before you have to leave"
The hospital mainly provide the room and refreshments.
Jo - Bridie is gorgeous. I am sorry you didn't get to hold your angels.Dream too ... that is another tough thing to deal with.
Bailey - I love the name Asha and yes it is hard to see our babies sometimes.I have cyber friends who didn't. One only just last week told me she looked at her son's photos for first time in over 2yrs. She has just had a new baby and I think she was curious to see similarities and it was just her right time.
Everyone is right in saying we do what is best for us at the time and we can't live with regrets.We all have things we wish we did differently but hope we never have to again. Talking about it openly helps others.
Your idea of meeting up is great.I met up with a two BB ladies I met in ttc amal last week.Though I have met them both before one individually and at other BB meetups-it was our first time altogether.
I can see you are all developing a special bond with each other and supporting each other. I nod in agreement when reading your posts.
Continue to go gently and with strength ladies ... your angels would eb so proud of you all for helping others like you do.
Bec - goodluck ... I am thinking of you and hoping this does the trick for you.
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Oooh a faint posive on a OPK now I have figure out if I just missed O or O is coming. Retest in 12 hrs....will put life on hold rofl
Bec
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Good luck Bec - I hope that it means o is coming :)
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Thanks Trish for your kind and encouraging words. I just find that talking with you beautiful ladies helps me so much. You are the only ones that understand me, know my pain, and feel my heartache.
Today Cooper is 2 months old. I am trying to be strong and keep myself busy today. I am going to buy a frame for his birth certificate and put it on the wall for all to see because I am proud of him and want his birth to be recognised. I don't want people to forget.
I just can't believe it has been 2 months. It feels like 2 days, although like you all said early on, you learn to live with the pain. I think I am slowly learning. It still hurts so much but I am trying to manage it.
I hope that my angel is watching over me and gives me the strength to accept the results I get tomorrow................ forever in my heart and dreams, I love you Cooper.
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Dear Lynn: Every day is hard I know but it is particularly hard on days like these. I know how 2 months feels like a lifetime ago and a heartbeat ago at the same time. You should be proud of Cooper's birth certficate because you gave him the gift of birth like any other mother. I hope today is a calm day for you and that as the sun rises tomorrow, no matter what the results are, you can look up at the morning sun feel the love that Cooper has for you and his Dad. :hugs: to you sweetie.
Dream: Wow what an eventful holiday! I am impressed but the snake wrangling!!! Good luck with TTC this month, I hope the acupuncture does the trick.
Baby Amore: your support group sounds wonderful. I guess all that anyone wants is to tell their story in a safe and supportive environment around people who understand every word they speak. Thanks for the kind words about being UTD. I am not really up to announcing it formally yet, want to wait for my first scan in 16 sleeps.
Well we had the most wonderful time on the Harbour last night. I was such a fantastic introduction to Sydney. I managed to avoid the continual offers of Bubbly, Red and soft cheeses by saying that I have high Blood Pressure at the moment and the Doctor has told me no alcohol or salty food. Well it is partly true so it wasn't a lie. We didn't end up getting back to the marina until 9.30pm and by the time we got home I felt more relaxed then I have in a very long time. I am a bit bummed today though, DH just left and although we are used to being apart, this is the first time since losing Harrison so I don't know how I'll be. Anyway I am keeping myself busy today, I am doing some washing, going to the gym, do the grocery shopping and then it will be time for a nanna nap.
I hope everyone, especially you Lynn are having an ok day.
Huge :hugs: to everyone
Love Spring.
PS, If anyone is interested in the Sydney Catch Up I have started a separate thread.
PPS, Has anyone heard from Flowerchild? I am starting to get worried, wasn't she due back ages ago?
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Lynn - I am thinking of you today and I hope you get through it ok, Cooper will be watching over his Mummy and Daddy through today and always. My heart goes out to you today Lynn :hug:
Dream - Sounds like a wonderful holiday, now that you are home you will need a rest from all the drama!
Bec - :crossfingers: Oh and I would be interested in a catch up between Melb gals - I'm half way between Geelong & City.
Trish - Your support group sounds wonderful, I wonder if they have one in Melbourne so I might need to look into it. Really think I need it at the moment :frown: I have seen a psychologist twice but last time (thurs) I really noticed that she watches the clock towards the end and I sort of feel hurried up, and as soon as the 45 mins is up she sort of makes moves to get out of her chair which basically says "get out"!
Spring - Your day yesterday sounds wonderful, glad you felt relaxed. Thinking of you while DH is away :)
Me - I won't go into it today!
I hope everyone is well.
Mel
P.S. I have been thinking about Deb lately too and wondering if she is ok, from memory I thought she was going to be back mid Jan. I hope she is alright!
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I think Deb has some things to sort out .I hope she will be back when she is ready.I am sure she would be touched everyone is thinking of her.
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Thanks Baby-Amore for letting me know about Flowerchild. If you are in contact with her, can you let her know that we miss her and her insightful and caring posts. When she is ready, I can't wait to hear from her again and I hope all is OK with her and her wonderful family.
Mel: That is a short post and you have me worried, I hope you are OK. I had planned to give you a call at about 5.00pm, Is that OK? If I don't hear otherwise I will call and if you don't want to talk I totally understand. It must be a horrible feeling to be worried about the time when you see you psych. You should raise it with her as it is not a good thing and she may not be that aware of how obvious she is. She is meant to be a professional and instead of giving you hints that time is about to be up she should be upfront with you and let you know. Just let her know hun, or if you are not happy, try to get a referral to someone else. I am so happy that you are organising a Melbourne group. Oh and I am putting your B'day pressy in the mail tomorrow so I hope it gets there by Wednesday. I might send it express just to be sure so keep your eye out for it.
Well so much for my grand plans of going to the gym and shopping. I lay down on the couch for a moment and woke up three hours later and only because DH rang to say he had arrived in Canberra. I must have needed it.
I am having a major case of pre-Mondayitis but I am looking forward to a night perched in front of the telly and then early to bed.
Anyway, I'll be in later to say hi.
Spring :)
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Thanks girls for thinking of me today. :grouphug:
Mel - I hope you are ok. Your post sounds like you have something on your mind. Remember we are here for you :hug:
Spring - you must have needed the sleep. Hope you are feeling ok.
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I hope Deb is ok, Trish I second what Spring said if you speak to her tell her we are all thinking of her :hug:
I am ok, I don't know why but lately I just seem to have more bad days than good. Admittely most of the people around me wouldn't have a clue cause I act like everything is fine, I see that it makes people feel uncomfortable when I have bad days and so sometimes its easier to just pretend. Everything I see or hear or think makes me teary. I have no idea what is wrong with me, I read a message my sister wrote in Nicholas' guest book yesterday afternoon and went off to have a shower so I could ball my eyes out without anyone knowing. Then last night had a great time (with a couple of drinks included), until my nephew bent down to his 3 month old sister and sang that "I love you" song from Barney (my sister bought Nicholas a Barney toy that sung that song and he was cremated with it, she said so he could always have that song to listen to... for those of you who dont know it goes - I love you, you love me, we're a happy family, with a great big hug and a kiss from me to you, won't you say you love me too) and I had to try so hard to hold back the tears. And then today when I woke up DH was already in the shower, so I balled my eyes out laying in bed and I can't even tell you why! And just the last few days in general have been crappy, Friday was ok but how odd is that considering it is the day I expected to be bad, I think I am in need of a straight jacket!
Spring - Will definitely talk to you when you call, wanna know all about how you are feeling with that little bubba growing inside :) And you shouldn't have bought a bday pressie, you guys have enough on your plate at the moment, but thank you all the same and its always exciting knowing something is coming :D
Lynn - Again, still thinking of you and hoping your day is going as well as possible :hugs:
Hi to everyone else.
Mel
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Trish is right, Deb is back but is taking a little personal time out to sort through some issues she has atm. But I'm sure she'll be back as soon as she feels ready.
Anyway time to lock this thread & start a new one over here
