I just feel so useless when I try to support you guys and encourage you to get that magical BFP because I haven't had that struggle. Sorry if I just can't be what I need to be for you but I am trying my hardest.

Mel: I agree with Bailey, you shouldn't have to wait until May. Is there any way you can get in earlier? If not, can you get a referral to a different specialist just so that you can get things moving? I can't even imagine how much stress this is causing you. It would be impossible to relax and that isn't really useful advice, this isn't about relaxing, it is about having an earth baby. I hope that DH's test today goes well. How long do you have to wait for the results? What is the Levovist test that you are having? I know you are searching for reasons and I totally understand why you are exploring every option. I just can't tell you how badly I want for you not to have to be going through this.

Lynn: I don't know what to say about this Christmas. There is nothing I can say to make it better. I remember last Christmas DH and I didn't see a soul, we had toast for lunch and spent the day curled up in bed sobbing. I wouldn't wish that pain on my worst enemy. I can understand why you are looking in the future towards Christmas, it is a major milestone and a day that will never really be the same without our babies. But try not to torment yourself. Just try to look at to each day as an acomplishment in itself. Otherwise if we look to far ahead, this journey just seems to long and too painful. I don't know if what I am trying to say is coming out right. I just mean that you are showing so much courage getting through each day so that in itself is massive. I hope that you have a gourgeous little bub growing in your belly or better still, in your arms by Christmas.

Bailey: I am so sorry hun that you are not hopeful for a BFP this month. I had a look at your ticker though and if the days in pink are the days you O'd, then is it still to early for a bfp? As I said to Lynn above, I wish I had the words to make it all better but every time I try to say what is in my heart, I feel like my words fail me. I am so sorry that you feel you won't have a bub in your arms this Christmas, but I am not going to give up hope for you until the witch arrives.

I am just so sad for each of you, you don't deserve to be suffering more pain then you already have. I am sending a huge cloud of to each of you.

Luv Spring