Oh Mel - that sounded so "final" when i read that DH said that NIcholas is "not coming back". It would have been so sad i know...i teared up - could just imagine how it felt. But at the same time it is not going to be easy whatever you decide. Whilst a difficult task, packing up Nicholas' room is not a bad thing - it is just getting ready and prepared for what is to come. But i think once it is done it will be a huge relief and a new start (i know something that will be hard to let go of).
We didn't have anything set up -was going to do it when i got home from hospital (only had basic stuff ready eg: clothes washed, nappies out, capsule...the cot was one you could dismantle in a second so my sister took that away whilst i was in hospital - it wasn't even up yet.) So when i got home there was no reminder (just some mini nappies - very cute) that were already opened...that is it ! :hugs:
Mel: I have to admit, packing up Harry's nursery was one of the hardest days for me. It was so final. I spent most of it on the floor holding his things sobbing. That was back in January so I think I might have been a bit more together if I did it now. I am not unpacking the nursery this time. My Mum and Dad and Best mate are going to set it up while I am hospital, I just can face doing it. It is such a symbolic thing having to unpack everything. Althoug it gave me so much comfort going into Harry's nursery and talking to him after losing Harry, I just want someone else to set it up for me this time. I think if you pack it up when you are moving then that might be a good idea, it is a reason for doing it and if you get to your new place and decide that you want to unpack it then you can. There are no rules about how to deal with this, you just do what feels right for you and DH at the time.
Anyway, my Mum and Dad are here so I will just be quick. Only 4 sleeps now until DH is home and not a moment too soon. Mum said to say hi to you all. Although she has never met you she says she feels like she knows you and said she is so grateful that I have come to know you all. Mel, she said to tell you that she was sending you extra special *good luck* vibes this month.
Bailey - didn't see you there (i missed more posts as usual) ! - i would have thought that you told your mum already...can't wait till you do - she will be so happy for you (and why wouldn't she).
Get that MS into you love - it is so much fun isn't it ! THankfully mine has settled the last few days - not so bad...i do however find it hard to face dinner but once i have a bite i am ok and can continue.
Hey Tommysmum - Yeah, must admit, happy to be feeling sick. It is different to last time though, but the same as when I was pregnant with DS. So it has been strange. I am trying to take that as a good sign. Aaaarrrggghhh! I just want to wish this year away I wish I could wake up and the baby is here and OK, lol. It is such a shame that I am so scared to be pregnant, I just wish I could enjoy this.
very cute ticker - and those last 2 weeks have flown - already 6 weeks - woohoo !! I am sure you will gain more confidence as the pgncy goes on....it is like 2 steps forward and 1 step back -but progress is progress !
Thanks to everyone for sharing your thoughts about your babies nursery. I guess it is a tough one huh? To be honest, I have really disassociated the nursery with Nicholas. Believe it or not we hang our washing on the clothes horse in there. I have always been able to go in there, on occasions I have sat in the rocking chair and cried my eyes out but overall I feel ok in there. I guess it is just now that the topic of packing everything up has come up it just feels weird you know. The thing is my parents are probably going to be staying with us for a few weeks (which will really cramp the TTC thing but what can ya do) in just under a month and we have nowhere for them to stay long term because with the kids the rooms are all taken up. So DH and I thought maybe it was time we bit the bullet and just packed everything up. We havent been successful in getting UTD anyway and we will be moving hopefully. I think I will need to leave it to DH to do it though, I just dont think I am strong enough. Maybe my sister or someone could come and help him, I dunno.
Bailey - I can imagine how hard it was when you found Asha's things, those pjs sound adorable and its just heartbreaking when you think of those things That is a really good thought you know, maybe we will just store the things that we want to change. Maybe we will want to use them if we have a 3rd bub. Bring on the m/s by the way! Cant wait for it myself - crazy chick I am! Your into Mexican at the moment? Well you need to get your butt down to Melbourne because as we all know I was Mexican in a past life Oh and I agree with Tommysmum your mum would be over the moon (not that I know her but you know...).
Tommysmum - I am so sorry I made you teary But you are right, whatever we decide it will be a hard decision. Those little nappies are so cute arent they? We had everything done. All clothes washed and put away in the drawers, we have a little change table caddy that is stocked with nappies and wipes and powder, and we have our baby bag packed. I havent touched any of it, I just couldnt. It probably sounds weird that we had done so much but Nicholas was born on 5 Sept and I was booked in to be induced on 22 Sept and wasnt finishing work until the week before so we had to be prepared - or so we thought anyway.
Spring - That is a great idea to get your parents and girlfriend to set everything up for you while you are in hospital. I keep thinking that, what if we pack it all up and then I dont have to strength to set it up again. But I never thought of that, someone we trust could do it for us. I remember when you were packing up Harry's thing and I remember how hard it was for you :hugs: And it was only a few months since he was gone too, gosh that would have been hard. I dont think I would have been able to do it that soon, you are such a strong person. I know alot of it is necessity but really we are ALL such strong women for living our lives each day.
Tess - Wow Tess that must have been so hard packing up your nursery the very day you got home from hospital. I understand why you felt you needed to, but my god that would have been heart wrenching. You will be able to set up a nursery next time and only pack it up when bubs needs a bedroom instead of a nursery!
Anyway, guess I had better go to bed - as Bailey pointed out it will be a busy night Wednesday night, and also we only meant to not DTD for a couple of nights beforehand so looks like its DHs lucky night! And I guess now that I have admitted I am on antidepressants (which I am currently weaning off of for the 2nd time, hopefully for good this time - fingers crossed) I can also admit that they take away most, if not all, of my sex drive So poor DH isnt getting it as regularly as he is used to LOL.
Oh no Bailey - Dont need to go to bed early tonight! Just worked out that we cant DTD because FS said abstain for 2-3 night prior to Wednesday - OMG my poor DH hasnt had it for quite a few nights I just told him that situation, poor bugger
Mel - hope you and DH are doing ok today. To me the months just fly past yet it just feels like yesterday that we lost our babies. Those nappies are very cute - you forget how small a newborn is....so cuddly and precious. Whatever and whenever you decide to do with NIcolas' room will be the right decision at the right time. Thinking of you (and poor DH missing out - he must feel like my DH at the moment). LOL
Bailey - hope you and DH are doing ok to day too. As i said with Mel, can't believe how fast this year has gone. All the years fly by and even though we think 40 is a hell of a long time it is not in the scheme of things. THinking of you both...
Mel - thinking of you today I know it will be a tough day but we are all here to support you through.
I was just as organised as you. I had finished work at 34 weeks because my feet were massive and it was too painful to walk around work. The week before we had Cooper I had washed all his clothes, his towels, the bed, change table mat.........everything. I even short-sheeted the bed. We had the car seat in the car and this was all done at 36 weeks. I guess I was just excited and wanted to be organised. I wouldn't be giving anything away. Even if you want to decorate the nursery different this time, I would still keep all of Nicholas' things. I think you would regret it if you did. I remember when I was in the hospital and I told my mum to go home and get rid of everything in the room. She didn't and I am actually glad she didn't. I guess it was just how I felt at the time. I won't be doing anything this time around. Once I hear the cry of bubs then I will send my mum to my house to wash every thing. I just want to do things differently this time. I don't want to be organised. I'm not even going to buy anything until he/she is born.
Not long now until your big test! Hope you survived last night without being headbutted!!
Bailey - your bub is speeding! Before you know it you will have that bubba in your arms I have no symptoms what so ever! I am a bit worried about that to be honest I have a bt on Thursday to check my hcg levels so hopefully they are rising nicely.
Spring - hope you are having fun with your mum & dad. Are you working this week? How long are they here for?
Happy 9 month birthday little Nicholas. I know you're are up there looking after all of your little friends.
Mel - I really do think you should pack Nicholas' things away for now but hold onto them, you just never know how you feel about them later. If you decide later that you can't use them or don't want them, then you could pass them on. I think if I have a girl this time, I will use some of the things we had bought for Asha, but we did put aside some things just for her. But I guess I won't know until the time comes. It's quite a big thing isn't it?
It is a big decision on what to do with things that we bought for our angels. My mum said to me if Cooper was here and I had another baby would I hand the things down to the next baby. I said yes. This is the way that I look at it. Everything was bought for Cooper and now he is handing it over to his brother or sister. I guess we just need to do what is right for each of us. There is no right or wrong, but you just need to be comfortable with your decision and at the end of the day, you can always change your mind.
mel - i agree with lynn, bailey and tommysmum, just keep a hold of the stuff, you just never know how you might feel when your next one is here. as for the nursery its always going to be Nicholas' nursery no matter how much you change it, i mean that in a way that yeah you can pack things up, but the memories are always going to be there, i guess its a bit like how you've explained how you are emotionally, you may not show it on the outside but you feel it on the inside. does that make sense? it does in my head
Hi Girls - Thank you so much for all of the well wishes today, you gals are the best
Spring - How are you and lil Spring? Meant to say last night (how rude of me!) thank you so much to your Mum for her extra special vibes - I need all the vibes I can get. Hope you are enjoying your time with them.
Lynn - OMG, I had short sheeted the cot too! And I have to admit it is still untouched, I hope it doesnt sound grubby but in the whole 9 months I havent taken them off and washed them And I agree with you, I have thought the same thing about Nicholas' things being handed down even had he been ok. We will be keeping the clothes and toys we had bought. I just think I want a new theme next time. I think I want a boy or girl theme. Mind you I don't wanna jump the gun, I actually have to get UTD before I worry about that, for now I will focus on the current nursery not the future one. How are you feeling today? I read your post to Bailey about not having pg symptoms and I just wanted to say try not to worry too much, the only symptoms I had with Nicholas was tiredness apart from that I wouldnt have known. Oh well I guess no AF was a symptoms too but you know. It is gonna be a long wait for your u/s but I just know that everything is gonna be fine
Tommysmum - Our poor DHs, the burden they must bear
Klee - Yeah I know what what you mean, and you are right the memories will always be there. That is the reason why we cant bring ourselves to put one of the kids in there. It will remain a room for the clothes horse, and if my parents come to stay in a few weeks they will have a room. Two more sleeps
Bailey - I think it is nice that you have some things just for Asha, you can put them away and they can be keepsakes for you to keep forever. Things that Faith wont be able to cover in drool and snot LOL The main thing that was especially for Nicholas was a Geelong Football Club bib that my Mum bought when I was pg (DH is a big fan) and it was his so he was cremated with it. The other things that are specifically his are the toys he was given by people when he was born. I couldnt part with them at the time of the funeral so I kept them because they touched his skin. I will never give them to any of our children, even if they get put away I dont mind but they are his and I will keep them safe and they can be cremated with me when I die so that I can take them to him. Sounds corny I know, and I might change my mind in the future but for now thats what I want.
Deb - You have been quiet lately, I hope everything is ok and that you are just really exhausted because Col is zapping all of your energy.
Hi to everyone else.
Love Mel
~ Thinking of you today my beautiful boy, and every other day ~
I wish I could wake up and the baby is here and OK, lol. It is such a shame that I am so scared to be pregnant, I just wish I could enjoy this.
but what can ya do) in just under a month and we have nowhere for them to stay long term because with the kids the rooms are all taken up. So DH and I thought maybe it was time we bit the bullet and just packed everything up. We havent been successful in getting UTD anyway and we will be moving hopefully. I think I will need to leave it to DH to do it though, I just dont think I am strong enough. Maybe my sister or someone could come and help him, I dunno. 
That is a really good thought you know, maybe we will just store the things that we want to change. Maybe we will want to use them if we have a 3rd bub. Bring on the m/s by the way! Cant wait for it myself - crazy chick I am! Your into Mexican at the moment? Well you need to get your butt down to Melbourne because as we all know I was Mexican in a past life 
Oh and I agree with Tommysmum your mum would be over the moon (not that I know her but you know...).
But you are right, whatever we decide it will be a hard decision. Those little nappies are so cute arent they? We had everything done. All clothes washed and put away in the drawers, we have a little change table caddy that is stocked with nappies and wipes and powder, and we have our baby bag packed. I havent touched any of it, I just couldnt. It probably sounds weird that we had done so much but Nicholas was born on 5 Sept and I was booked in to be induced on 22 Sept and wasnt finishing work until the week before so we had to be prepared - or so we thought anyway.
So poor DH isnt getting it as regularly as he is used to LOL. 
I have a bt on Thursday to check my hcg levels so hopefully they are rising nicely.
And I agree with you, I have thought the same thing about Nicholas' things being handed down even had he been ok. We will be keeping the clothes and toys we had bought. I just think I want a new theme next time. I think I want a boy or girl theme. Mind you I don't wanna jump the gun, I actually have to get UTD before I worry about that, for now I will focus on the current nursery not the future one. How are you feeling today? I read your post to Bailey about not having pg symptoms and I just wanted to say try not to worry too much, the only symptoms I had with Nicholas was tiredness apart from that I wouldnt have known. Oh well I guess no AF was a symptoms too but you know. It is gonna be a long wait for your u/s but I just know that everything is gonna be fine 
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