Lynn - Thankyou so much for burning a candle for Asha, it's a beautiful thing to do.
Mel - How are you doing today?
I am ok about the BFN as I said yeaterday, the line was so faint, I just didn't feel confident. But I looked at it again this afternoon and the line still looks the same, and it is definetly there, so it's a little disapointing, but I am still a couple of days before AF is due, so who knows, it may still work out after all. I will try again either tomorrow or saturday. But I am ok, so don't worry.
Well on a happier note, finished work today and go on holidays on saturday...woo hoo!
Bailey: I am sorry for not mentioning your darling little girl Asha in this morning's post. I hope you had a peaceful day remembering you darling little girl with wings. Big :hugs: About the BFN, I still have hope for you honey. We leave at lunch tomorrow so I will be here in the morning to check on you. Don't forget HGC (or whatever the hormone is) doubles approximately every 48 hours so I wouldn't expect the line to get much darker in 24 hours. Good luck for tomorrow hun, rememeber, it isn't over till the witch sings.
Mel: Big huge warm fuzzy :hugs: to you and your little boy today babe.
Sorry but I will have to pop in later and do personals. I have so much to do before we leave tomorrow.
BAiley - sorry to hear that you got a BFN. As i said in my text to you yesterday there is no reason that you cannot be pregnant and every reason that you can be so don't give up...too early to test perhaps ? Lets hope so. Just bring a decent HPT with you to Baaaaali ! If i don't get to talk to you before you fly out have a wonderful holiday with DH and the crew - will be a wonderful time.
Hey Girls, Well I just need to have a major vent about MIL so you don't have to read if you don't want to, I just needed to get it off my chest.
Anyway, DH gets home last night, we are both really excited about going away and are doing the final packing. He says oh so an so and so and so in Adelaide want to catch up with us when we are there (family members from his side) and I said, well we are going to be so busy, how do they even know we are going to be in Adeliade as we had previously decided we didn't have time to catch up with every relative under the sun and just wanted a weekend away to ourselves. Well you guessed, my stupid Bailey word MIL had taken it upon herself to contact all the relatives. I said to DH, it is amazing how your mother just manages to ruin everything we do, it is quite impressive that she is so consistent (sarcasim intended) so DH said, well now that you have raised it, I really wanted to talk to you about mum.
Apparently she has been calling me and hanging up when it goes to the answering maching (no big surprises there, you don't have to be a brain surgeon to figure that one out) and so called him instead. He said he has never heard his mum so upset in his entire life and that she is devastated that I am so angry/upset at her. He said she was crying so much that she could hardly talk. Now sorry if I sound a little harsh here, but she is a manipulative cow who is so passive aggressive it isn't funny. I have not one ounce of sympathy for her, I have cried a billion tears over the last 6 months so it might sound a bit mean but I don't really care that she is upset. DH said, can you just sought it out please for my sake, just lie, pretend, I don't care but can it all be better. But this is what always happens with my MIL, she manipulates people until they end up feeling sorry for her, pathetic I know.
Well I haven't been able to sleep all night, so I am going to call her later this morning and this is what I am going to say.
"I want you to listen to me, don't say a word, don't interupt me, just listen to me and take in the meaning of the words I am about to say. You have had nothing to do with me for 6 months, and now that I am pregnant again, it seems that all of a sudden you want to get involved. Sure, you may have been thinking about me and wanting to call me, but thoughts means nothing to me, it is actions that I needed. I don't care what you reason for not contacting me, is because to be honest, there is no reason good enough.
However, I don't want DH to be worried / upset about this, and to be honest, in the scheme of my life, this is really not worth me worrying about, I have enough other stuff to work through. So here is what I am willing to do. I will agree to move forward, to let bygons be bygons (sp). Next week, if you call, I will answer, but don't be surprise if I only want to speak for a short period of time. Now we are going away, please let us enjoy this weekend as we had planned. Please don't call DH and worry him about this, he has enough to worry about. If there is something that you would like to say that you find difficult saying to me, put it in a letter or write me an email.
So that is that. I will speak to you again soon."
What do you think? I am doing it for DH. If I had my way I would either not ring her or ring her with a string of expletives but I have to respect his feelings.
I am going to take the dogs to the kennel, and then I am going to call her.
This is the last thing I want to be doing on Harry's 6 month birthday, but I would rather get it off my chest then stew on it all weekend.
Spring - I'm thinking of you, DH and Harrison today. Happy 6 month birthday, little man. Have fun playing with all the angels :hugs: I will light a candle tonight for Harrison and think of him as I watch it glow.
Spring you need to do what is best for you as well as DH. I understand that it is DH's mother so maybe your phone call to her is the best way. I can understand your anger and hurt at the fact she hasn't called in the past 6 months. I think that it is important for her to hear it from you so she understands how much she has hurt you. I think it will be a good idea to speak with her this morning and then not worry about it today as you need to think of your precious little angel on his birthday. You should also enjoy your time away with DH. As you don't see him that much, you need to enjoy this quality time with him. I hope that your MIL understands your point and that you feel ok after the conversation. Have a safe trip, I will miss you but I will speak to you soon. Have fun and take care.
Oh, stupid computer, i just wrote a big post and then lost it...doh!
Tommysmum - Yeah, I was pretty sus on the positive HPT i got, I am so glad that I didn't get my hope up. It is just annoying that I got two +'s with that brand though. But, I have been known to have even longer cycles than the 34 days I am predicting, so I could still be testing too early so I am not giving up just yet, I will take another test away with me and try it again on monday or tuesday. What about you? Let me know if anything happens while I am away, I will have my phone so just sms me. If not, we will catch up when I get back.
Lynn - Thankyou for lighting a candle for Asha, it was a beautiful thing to do. It inspired me to do the same and as I watched it I though alot about her and about all of our little ones. i hope you get some good news over the next couple of weeks and I look forward to hearing about your success with your new plan the FS has for you. Lotsa to you Lynn.
Spring - How did your phone call to MIL go? I really hope that you and DH can not think about it too much and enjoy your break together. Afterall, this may be your last holiday as a 'couple'. your next trip will be a family one!
I will get on later when I have finished packing and cleaning up after my little monster.
to you Lynn.
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