I am very honoured to have been chosen as a bridesmaid for my best friend's wedding and am so thrilled that she's getting married to a lovely bloke. It's going to be a fantastic day and they'll be a lovely couple in the future.
However, a couple of things are getting to me (and DH too). The first being the number of events we are having to have for this wedding.
So far I've been to four bridesmaids dress fittings and there are still 2 more. There is so little done between each, I really don't know why we keep having to go to these. I do keep comparing all of this to my wedding, which I probably shouldn't do, but for my bridesmaids we had 2 or possibly 3 dress fittings to get the whole thing done.
On top of that, DH, DD and I are going to a lunch for all of the bridal party to meet- once again lovely idea, and I don't really have a problem with it, apart from the number of opportunities we'll have to meet people with all the rest of the events coming up.
We have also been invited to a cellar party for the bride and groom, but have decided not to attend, as it is on our wedding anniversary.
There is also a hens night, which is fine. The organising of this is taking a bit of time - meeting with bridesmaids, etc. But that is all expected when you are a bridesmaid.
We then have a wedding rehearsal, fine again.
Then the wedding (yay!).
Then the day after the wedding, a wedding lunch to reminisce (?) about the wedding day. The invitation for this has been included in the wedding invitation.
Thinking back, we did have people (wedding party and close family) back to my parents house the next day to open presents, but it was a very casual invitation without expectation that people be there.
Maybe this isn't too much, I don't know? What do you think? Am I being rude by missing the cellar party and possibly more of the festivities? There are 5 bridesmaids, so there'll be plenty of people there.
I think a lot of brides go too far - or maybe I was a neglectful bride.
How do you have five girls you love enough to be bridesmaids who don't already know each other?
I had two bridesmaids and one usher - one bridesmaid and the usher met the best man on the wedding day. My sister (chief bridesmaid) met him two days before. My hen night - neither of my bridesmaids organised nor attended. If I'd had three or four parties for just the wedding party I'd have been told off!
You're not a bad person for not attending. You have a good reason at least! Good luck.
(Actually, I want a remeniscing lunch - going to try to get DH to agree to vow renewing for our 10th anniversary and get the gang back together for that. With their spouses and children too. Just us and the four attendants and their families... will be fun!)
The wedding party lunch and the cellar party (not even sure what that is) seem a bit much but everything else sounds normal. 6 dress fittings seems like a lot too. I've been in a few weddings and we only had 2 fittings.
We had a big (daytime) party the day after our wedding which was really nice for out of town guests.
I wouldn't be attending the cellar party either if it was on my anniversary. So, no I don't think you're being rude at all.
I didn't organise anything for my bridal party to meet each other beforehand. I only had 2 bridesmaids, one of them being my sister. She and the other bridesmaid met when we first went looking for dresses. I gave them each others contact details and they liaised with each other about all the other stuff. DH's brother was the best man. We didn't have any groomsmen.
I think some brides go all out and that is fine, it's their wedding, but like any other invitation you have the right to decline if you don't want to go. Don't feel bad about it. Like you say, there will be plenty of other people there.
Best Friends Wedding - whinge #1
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