oh hun *hugs* that sounds so stressful. I don't know any answers, other than to say it doesn't sound like the kind of community I'd want to be rushing to join. (the congregation, not the Church). Is it worth trying other congregations again? I know you said you wouldn't be comfortable, but it doesn't sound too comfortable (or supportive) with this one. I'm not a church goer, so I don't know the 'rules' but I couldn't read and not post xxxx I hope you find some support, comfort and answers soon xxx
Oh my goodness, that's appalling . Please do write that letter outlining their lack of support and care, they need a big wake up call! I hope you can find a much more welcoming church that you can make your home.
The Church doesn't sound as if it is acting in a very christian manner. I don't know what to suggest as my church does not require someone to be an active church goer to be baptised - My family certainly do not attend church on a regular basis, generally only around easter and christmas. But we are still believers and still raise our children in the faith (and ensure they have a good religious education). Going to church on a weekly basis is not a sign of faith or belief IMHO.
I would encourage you to seek out a minister of your faith (although not nessecarily at that particular church) and discuss (all) the issues with them and seek counsel.
Thank you so much for your replies and advise. I feel ridiculous. I can't stop crying. Gee who would have thought I would care this much. I think this letter has just emphasised the rejection I have felt for along time over their lack of support over the past 2years when I really wanted answers as to why I felt so punished by God and again by them not caring enough to even give me a call. Apart of me felt like a fraud now been comfortable to return to the Church now that I'm in my happy place with J until this has happened. I don't think I can ever feel truely welcome there now. Yes I'll definately be writting a letter as although I'd love to call them I know I'll go to tears.
Oh hun, like I said, I'm not a church goer, but I don't think God is punishing you, I'd rather think He is creating an opportunity to find the place that's right for you and your family. I hope you find it soon x
hun - how devastating that a place that should be full of compassion has ended up hurting you so badly. I am with the others - I would be writing a letter to them and then finding a place where you are welcomed and loved and feel at home. I left the church for many years (although not God as such!) and have only recently gone back and was expecting judgement and Im not sure what else because I had "backslidden" but the church I have found has felt like home since the day I first went. Good luck finding somewhere and I really think it is telling that nobody contacted you when you weren't there for so. Churches are fighting for membership these days and some wonder why but they should be reaching out to people not making them feel judged. I feel pretty passionately about this sorry if I come across as preachy and agree that you should call some other churches for a chat and visit. xoxoxo
Tanstar you definately have not come across as preachy lol. I have started writting my letter to them. I want it sent next week whilst its all new. Then I guess I'll be searching for somewhere to Baptise her soon and will then have to find a place I love as much as I did love the old place I went to.
Oh it makes me so sad to read about this. What a terrible job they have done at loving you!!
I think there are two very different issues here (as you pointed out)- the first is the question whether a church should baptise a child from a family that is not a current active member- thats just one of those tricky theological minefields that you should not take personally, I guess that the letter you got was just standard protocol for them, decided for whatever reason. There are lots of churches that will baptise your child no questions asked, and if thats what feels right for you then someone can definitely make that happen.
But the much bigger issue is how unwelcome and unsupported they have made you feel. Maybe they have just failed in your case and are usually very good at this, but either way, they've hurt you and missed a big opportunity to show you God's love. So sad. Do you think there might be another congregation in your area that you could look into? (depends I guess how much you are attached to your denomination) maybe one with more families? I can imagine it would be hard to feel part of a community of over 70s even if they were trying harder!! Maybe this is the chance to find a really great, encouraging Christian community that will give you and your family all the support and encouragement that a Church should, and get you feeling excited about it again!
I have been so blessed by my church family, I really pray that you can find something similar.
thats terrible! if u cant rely on your church, who can you rely on?
if it were me id be finding another church and explain the situation to them. i hope little J gets to be baptised
Well in my opinion this church is not doing much of a job of showing Jesus' love! At my church, if you are away for more than a couple of weeks, someone (of not the pastor himself) rings you to see if everything is okay.
I'd be looking for a more loving church myself and having your child baptised there.
That does not send a warm feeling at all about the congregration..
Both DH and I have christian upbringings and beliefs, and are not regular church goers, and haven't actually been in the last few years.. However the priest at our local church had no issues baptizing either of our children.
Hope you manage to sort through it and get your DD baptized as your heart desires.
Reply With Quote
. Please do write that letter outlining their lack of support and care, they need a big wake up call! I hope you can find a much more welcoming church that you can make your home.
Bookmarks