Interstate Wedding, possible dilema.. not sure i can do it!

[~ Zarava Flutterby ~]

had a chat with DP last night about it and basically i am going alone or not at all.

1. he thinks it's rude to take a baby to a wedding
2. he doesn't want DD in some random car seat possibly not fitted properly
3. we can't afford to go as a FAMILY for him to watch DD while i'm at the wedding.

I really don't know what to do, it will be very hard to build up a supply of milk in that time and also to have to PUMP while away will be both annoying and probably a little inconvenient.

I don't want to miss this wedding... Hmmm stupid DP, why can't he understand.

i have until Feb to RSVP, maybe once i have had bub i should start expressing and see how i go.. she will be feeding quite a bit so hopefully i can use that extra supply to build up enough?

[feeb]

Hun if that is what DP thinks and it was me I would not be going then as no way I would cope leaving a new born baby for a weekend.

DS I didnt leave with DH for more than me to go shopping for food till he was 11 months old.

And he now has only been baby sat by my mum and one friend 2 times in total!!!!

[~ Zarava Flutterby ~]

I actually think it would do him some good to be alone with the 2 girls, especially when Z will be little.. only as with A he didn't do a lot until now thats she's more 'FUN' lol

I trust him 100% and think it might make him realise my jobs not as easy as he thinks... lol
I know ti sounds horrible and i could NEVER have left A behind at that age and i really didn't want to think about it with Z either but this is a life long friend (literally)... maybe i can convince DP to let me take Z, she wont cost anything... hmmmm

I know what you mean about not leaving them though... i cried when i went in for day surgery when A was 6mths old

[Party-of-five]

ive never heard of anyone objecting to having young babies at weddings and as you said he is a lifelong friend so would be more understanding.
Once Z arrives maybe DP will realise what a hand full two littlies are and be happy for you to take Z so he can spend some quality time with A.

[briggsy's girl]

maybe book your flight for you to go - then he can't really back out. leave it til a fortnight or so before you're due to go - and do a day trip away from him - leave early am, dont get back til after Z is in bed at night - see how you BOTH cope being apart

i'm sure your friend would expect Z there - i certainly would if it were my wedding! (for interstate people, or even those travelling at all, i expected kids there!)

[briggsy's girl]

in all honesty, i wouldnt' go if i couldn't take the baby - it's not really convenient (and phooey to your DP about not taking DD to a wedding! pffffffft! grumpy bum!). it's going to put undue pressure on you to build up adequate supply for her, and for her to be able to take EBM from someone else at that age. at 3 months they face a growth spurt, wonder week - and all they really want is mummy to be there. how would you cope being so far away if DP rang you in distress cos the baby just won't settle for him?

personally i couldn't do it

i would contact your friend and say you're up in the air, but given it will be so soon after having DD, chances are you won't be able to come as you can't come as a family (financially) and you'd have to leave DD at home which would be stressful for everyone

oh, and another pfffffffffft to DP - does he not think you're smart enough to check the installation of the car seat?

ETA - it sounds like he is trying to ask you not to go for whatever reason (financial is my guess seeing you're trying to sort finances for your house) - but doesn't want to say no we can't swing it, and is making excuses.

[sneakysparkle]

It is so not rude to take a baby to a wedding!!! Especially one under 6 mths that is breastfed! JMO though I guess

I had an interstate wedding earlier this yr - DD1 stayed home with DH and I took DD2 with me. She was 5mths old - and it was no hassle whatsoever!

All the best darl