I totally understand what you are thinking.
My wedding was beautiful - I was so blessed to be able to have all my family there, and ILs flew in from NZ all on 4 weeks notice...but the day wasn't what DH and I wanted, the food at the reception was beyond disappointing, the reception itself was also bad.
My mother was dying of cancer and I planned the wedding in 5 weeks, I was not happy with my dress, there were people there I wished I didn't have to invite, like mum's "partner" and my dad cracked it the day before the wedding and refused to come - even though the venues were picked TOTALLY based on the fact that he is immobile and in an electric wheelchair (very inflexible)...

I was so happy mum got to see my special day, but thinking about MY wedding - so not what or how I wanted it!

I want to have a second wedding, perhaps in a couple of years and do it the way we wanted. I think that will make me feel a bit better about it.

So I say go for it! Perhaps wait for an anniversary or something - there is no rule that says you can renew your vows one year in or have a second wedding

I so LOVE the idea of the TTD photo session too! Might have to look into that

Anyway, I hope you can sort out your issues with your BM it is not cool that such a good friend (obviously or she wouldnt have been in your wedding to begin with) and you are fighting