hwo do you know when its time to give up?

[kawazuki]

how do you know its time to leave work and Stay at home with your kids?

we are in a bind at the moment.

financially we are not better off me being at work as we have to fork out over $400 a week in day care for 2 kids.

i only just cover this with my income.

i am feeling guilty being at work when i just want to stay home and keep the great Bf'ing journey going. it looked like it was over but it all came back

i feel guilty when i only work half a day as i dont feel it is worthwhile.

i love my job though and feel guilty for thinking of leaving or dropping back to just one day.

i am torn.
just wondering how you overcome this and make the right decision

as if i pull the girls out i may not get the days back and wont be able to work.
but if i keep working will i regret it later on.

[Mrs Jak]

Sounds like you know what you want to do, but still feel guilty.

Unfortunately, (IMO) I think it's a sign of the times we live in, where we as Mothers feel pressure to stay in the workforce. Pressure that's either placed on us by ourselves or society.

I think it's great if it makes sense for your family, or enjoyment to work, but if you're going backwards and/or not enjoying it, then it's something to question.

I recently resigned at the end of my maternity leave after having my 2nd child, because I'm pregnant with my 3rd (unplanned) and even though it made perfect sense for us for me to leave, it was kind of hard to let go of that part of my life for now.

I sometimes wonder if my kids will actually be better off having me at home? Poor things I must say (IMO) I am improving as a sahm though

[kawazuki]

thats it

well financially we are backwards if i stay as day care is going up.

but personal guilt makes me want to stay at work. then i feel selfish lol
viscous circle.

actually typing it all out helps alot

[kelebek]

I went back 3 days a week when DS was 11 mnths old. When we looked at it we were better off financially with me staying at home with him. They are only little for such a short amount of time and before you know it they will be at school. I know I plan on doing some study and you can always retrain when they are at school and start working again.

[kawazuki]

i think if i left totally i would re train in a different field.

i dont think i could walk back into nursing after being away for 3-5 years.

[kelebek]

and that's ok to be in a totally different field cause to be honest after having kids we are totally different people. I know that I won't be going back into my old field but still can't decide what I wanna be when I grow up

[Bathsheba]

I know the guilt... went through that with my first child. Then... after i returned to uni and finished my degree ontop of working i realised that i had been so busy that my DD's childhood was nearly over! So when she was 9 I had my second child and swore i would not miss his childhood so decided to a fulltime SAHM. And then i had a third... and now it's been 7 years being a SAHM and even though it's been hard financially and for my sense of fulfillment (I cant wait to return to work) I don't regret it. Maybe if i had my extended family around i could have balanced work and homelife but with no one to help it just all seemed to come down to me. my youngest is nearly 4. After we move the plan is to settle him into kinder creche and then for me to find part time work. i'm not so hesitiant because i'll have extended family around to help. So how did i know? After watching my first child's life fly by... and not wanting to miss as much of my son's childhoods... plus yes... it costs too much to go to work!!!

ETA: my mother returned to nursing after a 20 year break... can be done... but i can't say she's that happy... but the money is good as a casual nurse.