Babies Born April 2008 #3

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Beatrix I know you have said that you have had counselling with DH, but have the two of you talked about why he is grumpy. My DH is grumpy and a lot lately too and there are 2 issues. One is me saying I wish I had his life and I'm going to be the man in my next life and the other is that he realy wants to have as he put it "a vacation from life with me". He is missing the pre children relationship. Is there a chance you could arrange for someone to have the kids, go out for a coffee and talk about how you are feeling?

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omg that is exactly Dh is prob, i am always saying how easy he has it etc. i should learn to shut up. His work is very stressful atm as well, (****er boss) and he is feeling very trapped having no drivers license so there is alot going on for him.


I would love to arrange a time but atm he is working 6-6, 5-6days a week and my parents (only people i trust with my kids) have just left this morning for 6 weeks!!


On the up side he has just sent me a mega long text message saying he knows he has been really unsupportive and everything so he knows and is sorry, just doesnt know how to feel better about it.

Tarnee sounds like Charlotte is doing really well, Oliver is starting to get rolls on his little chicken legs, they look so cute.
Shoegal big :hug: hope Baxter does well with his tests.
Fire I know that when I get a fairly good nights rest without Oliver fussing too much I feel like I can handle anything the following day, hope bubs does well again tonight.
Beatrix i'm not looking forward to Oliver getting his needles, it always makes me sad, but I know it is better for him in the long run. Sorry to hear that you and DH aren't getting along atm, a new baby in the house can test the strongest of relationships, hope you manage to get things sorted out.
BabyWrangler I gave up on forcing Oliver's routine on him today and he has seemed much more settled, even after his bath tonight, he had his bottle, seemed to fight sleep for a bit, but think that was because he got a little overtired, he was asleep by 5.30pm and is still sleeping now, will be going in to do a 'sneaky feed' at 10.30 if he hasn't woken by then. That is great that BJ is going so good now that he seems to be on the right medication for his reflux.
bellelass I started comp feeding with my 6 year old when he was 4 days old as my milk hadn't come in (didn't come in till day 8) and found it a struggle to get him feeding properly from the breast as it was obvious he preferred the bottle because it was easier, which is why I gave up, hope you manage to get bubs back to exclusively BF if that's what you want.
alittlegrubi hope you managed to figure out what Greer wanted in the end, and I am sure that you coped fine tonight on your own.

As for the cloth nappies, I planned to use disposable nappies Oliver right from the start, I did the whole cloth nappy thing with my 2 eldest and to be honest I just couldn't be bothered with it this time.

Oliver's routine today was pretty good for me actually, and he was the one who set the pace, he had his night feed at 4am, I then did have to wake him at 7.30 for his feed or he would have screamed in the car on the way to school as we have to leave at 8am, got him home, and he stayed awake for about 40 mins, I put him to bed still awake and he then slept till 12.30, where as before I would have woken him up at 10.30 so that then I could get him up at 2 for the before school pick up feed, but this way, he wasn't going to be needing another feed until 4ish, well when we got home, he slept until 4 but wasn't grizzly for a feed, so I bathed him at 4.30, he had his bottle at 5 and was in bed asleep by 5.30, at his 5pm feed he actually had 140ml of his bottle which amazed me, so he seems to be going 5 hours or so between feeds which is fine with me :)

All those getting those needles for their babies, I caution against the six in one shots they've just brought out. I caution against all of them really, but that one in particular is nasty.

Grubi, it could be a growth spurt?

Hi All,

Just a quick post - hope I am not gloating too much but I just had my 3rd night in a row of Charlotte 'sleeping through'. The first 2 nights she slept 10pm until 4.30am and last night was 8.30pm until 5am. She feeds every hour from 5pm until bedtime and after the early morning feed, she goes back to sleep until about 9am. I am getting soooo much sleep!!

The one problem with this - my very, very engorged boobs in the morning - they woke me up before she did this morning. I had to pump out 200mls from one boob whilst she fed on the other because I was sooo uncomfortable and already I can feel that I have filled up enough to keep me going for the day. I am wondering if I am risking losing my supply with her going so long between feeds. Do you think I should express both boobs until they are empty after she has gone to sleep at night so that they have all night to fill?? It will help me to build up my milk supply in the freezer anyway??

Hope the sleep fairies visit your place soon too!!

tarnee! you suck! :lol: that's so cool, maybe i'll do the every hour thing in the late day... i wouldn't mess too much with your supply until it has established itself, which it will do on it's own. whatever you express, your breasts will replace, incl oversupply, it will just adjust. i am gonna get dh to take off the excess next engorgement, and just enough that i can handle the feeling without having to wake DS.

Tarnee - I am so jealous! I might try that too -hourly feeds. Does she feed as much each time or are they just 'snacks'?

Nothing much to report here... will check back later!

Wow Tarnee thats great!

Bj is doing well in my eyes, bed and asleep by about 7:30 last night (he was very tired after a mucked up day yesterday), then i went in and fed him while he slept at 10:30pm, he went through til 4am, had a feed, back to sleep til 8:45, then a feed, up til about 10:00, into bed again, then up for us to go out at 11:30(I woke him), we went to a friends place and he slept til 2, had a feed, then was back in bed when we got home at 4:30....next feed is due about 6pm with his medi, then we start it all again.

Beatrix this post is for you

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omg that is exactly Dh is prob, i am always saying how easy he has it etc. i should learn to shut up. His work is very stressful atm as well, (****er boss) and he is feeling very trapped having no drivers license so there is alot going on for him. On the up side he has just sent me a mega long text message saying he knows he has been really unsupportive and everything so he knows and is sorry, just doesnt know how to feel better about it.

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:clap: OMG :clap: back at you....maybe we should put our DH's together to talk. Today my DH was making a big effort with both the kids, but every time Greer started crying he would get grumpy, so I ended up screaming at him to just give her here and go to the gym or whatever it was that he wanted to do. His response was, what so I can feel guilty about leaving you to deal with cleaning up and the kids. I asked why he suddenly felt guilty and his response was - "I've seen the light" it was funny.

I think that it is just that the two of us me and DH and probably for yourself too is that we are always too stressed by what we are doing (him - work and no time for self, me/you- kids and lack of sleep.

Not that this is for you, but I found that by giving him permission to have a night out with the boys helped. Maybe you could ask DH what would he like to do if he didn't have to consider anyone else and let him have it even if you have to wait 6 weeks if he wants a date with you. Do something romantic like handmake an invite to a date, just the two of you, again even if it is at home - write like coffee and cake for 2 at Chateau Beatrix - for a time when the kids are sleeping. I actually left a post it note on my DH's pillow asking him to have an affair with me and then I'd text him before he came home asking him to meet at my place for a quickie. If you treat him like someone you were starting a relationship with things might improve. Leave post its in his briefcase/lunchbox, on his toothbrush etc saying I love you in different ways. Give him something to smile about and he might start doing the same.

Sounds to me like he wants it to work... you're just going through a rough patch.

Going for a seperate post for the rest of you....

Tarnee If you keep expressing, won't that tell your supply to keep up for that time frame when she isn't feeding. Lucky you on the sleep through.

Sharon We went and laid down in the afternoon and I just kept talking to her when she cried until she fell asleep. We slept for about 2 and a half hours. When she started again for the witching hour, I tried the AP comforting, but ended up giving her a bath, fresh clothes a feed and she slept for an hour and a half from 8pm to 9.30pm, then fed again and slept until just befor 1am, then fed again and slept for another 4 hours until just after 4am, alert for a short time and back to sleep until 7.30am. I actually dealt with my day very well including cooking dinner and cleaning up - which I had written off when I posted yesterday.

Fire might be a growth spurt, she seems to need the feeds as she hasn't had a power chuck, which I have now identified as me overfeeding when she just needs some love and healing time. I'm trying to workout if I should by Tears and Tantrums or Aware Baby first since I can't find the in any public library in WA.

a quick hello to you all - quick because i'm cooking risotto (needs constant stirring). i have the sling on, all ready for the first sound of grizzling from DD, but amazingly she's currently quite content lying in a cocoon in the loungeroom to the sounds of eurovision.

tarnee, you must be the most well-rested mother in australia! i would happily endure the engorged breasts to sleep all night long... but i can't complain because although dd is waking frequently for feeds, she's going back to sleep after instead of having two-hour waking periods at ungodly hours. that said, i hope i haven't jinxed tonight by writing this because you never know with babies...

beatrix and grubi, good luck with your DHs. there's nothing more testing for a relationship than the arrival of babies. before dd arrived, dh and i managed to resolve some issues that had been weighing on my mind for years and that has made an enormous difference. he is very very slow to respond to emotional things, so i always ask him go away and think about things before responding because i know he takes time (days, even weeks!) to take things in. i have even put things in writing at times because it helps me clarify my thoughts and allows him to read, re-read and make a considered response. men can be so different from womenn sometimes...

ok gotta go. wishing a good and restful night to everyone!

hallelujah, i got 8 straight hours of sleep last night. she'd only slept for 4-5ish broken hours for the past 5 days with tiny catnaps during the day, so i knew there had to be a breaking point. she went down a 10, up at 5 and had 200mls, and wow she's asleep again... I don't expect it to ever happen again, but for now I'm just so grateful.

sharon- I'll either get her back on the breast or invest in an electric pump. Am weighing the options. I don't think I'll ff, I have such a good supply it almost seems like some terrible waste to not use it. And we're pretty poor and bm is so cheap.. ;) I'm just **** scared to try to put her back on the breast, after all the pain and pain pain pain and bleeding I went through before...

Janine- have given Lila the Hep B shot, and intend to have her MMR's at the very least. I'm a bit concerned about the one that contains thermisol (think thats what its called) as its been linked to autism... What are your reasons for being anti-injection? (website since Im sure it would take ages to write all about it...)

MGM- Lila liked Eurovision, too. Maybe a coincidence, but she was quite settled when it was on. hehe.

As for husbands... I encourage mine to go out and see his friends at least one night a week. Usually its him and a mate drinking beers and playing xbox for a few hours. Just that little bit lets him feel like he's still a person I guess. Not like I get any time like that, but I will soon enough when Lila's a little bigger. Anyway, the point is, that time is important to him and he comes home relaxed and refreshed and wanting to help out. Or maybe its guilt. Either way, he is happy and I'm happy because he is and because he comes home so ready to give me a little break and be a nurturing daddy for a few hours.

And I make a huge effort to dtd every few days even if Im exhausted and don't feel like it. Sex is important to him, not just the physical act, but feeling close to me and being loved in a way only I can provide for him. Its nothing protracted or earth-shattering usually but I think its important for us. It still feels a bit strange down there, almost like I've had a v-transplant or something, but its coming back slowly... Sorry if this is tmi but I think its important.

How on earth are you all getting your babies to sleep that long?

*grumble grumble*

I guess I'll have to deal with my lot cos his snuffles wake him and only feeds or sitting up for a while clears his nose. So I'm feeding almost hourly after 2am. I can't wait until he outgrows that.

Steph, you're right, it's a long history of research and I risk soundy preachy or judgmental so I'm trying to find satanicvaccines.com, which cuts to the chase (as you can tell by the name!), but they won't let me access it today. But the book Vaccination Roulette was informative for the layman. There are vax sites giving real research and info, not hyperbole. Actually, AVN has that book, and is not a bad website, although it is still building.

Thermisol is mercury. They use other names so if a parent reads the packaging, they can't really tell. Kinda like the food manufacturers who use numbers instead of the real ingredients. They have taken the mercury out of some vaxes (so they tell us), this year. But they still contain formaldehyde and dangerous proteins. Many babies have no reactions that you can see immediately, and that's the key. Parents think that cos their kid had no reaction, all is well and they coped with it. But that chemical ****tail is swarming in their immature veins for the rest of their life, and not all the damage is immediately seen. My kids (and myself) are not vaxed and we don't get sick like vaxed kids do. My daughter hasn't had her immune system hammered by vaxes so ironically, she is healthier and it shows. Yet my niece in the states is fully vaxed and ended up hospitalised with measles. The stats from that outbreak report that just as many vaxed kids as the unvaxed got the measles. So it isn't even working. Plus, they don't take effect for at least a year (they even tell us that), so doing it to protect an infant is pointless, they won't be an infant anymore by the time they apparently "work". And yeah, the link between toxins like mercury and autism has been effectively proven, they just are being a little dicey with releasing that info.

/rant :D

My doula made a homebirth video and I'm in it! I'm a celeb :lol:. Although I'm in the "when things go wrong" segment, which is about 2 minutes into it. I cried when I saw it, my husband and daughter and midwife... all supporting me... *sob*. For a looksee (for those with any time left after kidwrangling)

homebirth

Wow... I cried watching that, brought back so many emotions from Lila's birth. I'm such a sook lately. I put my story up in the birth stories forum- here. Was pretty normal I suppose, but I think it changed something in the way I see myself on a very elemental level. Empowering I suppose. If I can do that, I can do anything...

Ahh grizzly bear awakes...

I can't get the link to work, Steph, but I'd love to read your birth story.

hi All Thanks so muck for the wonderfull support this week.

soo Dh made an appearance at home on wed night and was much more supportive than he had been in a long time(even ditched origin with his mates to be at home with us). he understands now that i need some me time and us time as much as he needs his me time. as for spending time with his friends ( they are real dycks) but none the less i make the effort any way. it is going to take time but hes slowly coming around to thinking as a family 1st and an induvidual 2nd. and i agree sex is essential in our relationship.

We went to friends 21st last night and Russell was really good, he slept from 5.00 till 9, feed andback to sleep till we left at 10.30 he grizzled on the way home still asleep feed at 11 then slept till 3am and up again at 5:30 and was up and down untill 11am today. however is refusing to sleep on his back today. so is currently on his tummy and farting like a champ in his sleep. hes generally pretty good for 4-6 hours block sleep at night and 2-3 hours during the day. hes very alert and awake and playing most of the morning and afternoon.

Dp leaves for dolby tomorrow for work so we will see how this week goes

Grubi, re overfeeding, it's confusing isn't it? I can't figure it out. I read a real AP book that advocates comfort nursing, yet they chuck if they eat too much!

Do any of you think that it's the ability your kids have of sucking that helps them sleep? DH is trying to teach DS to suck his fingers and sometimes it works, but like a dummy, it feels like suppression to me so I'm grappling with it. So I'm wondering what you think the trick is at your house. Blankies and dummies and stuff are identified as things that stop a baby/child from expressing crying or other emotion, and I've seen that in DD now that she's older what Blankie did for her, good and bad. I am trying not to repeat certain mistakes. Anyone have an opinion on this?

Zennie, I'm glad things are looking up.

Janine - i let Russell comfort suck at the boob rather than offer his dummy and would rather hold him and comfort him then leave him to work it out for himself and so far todate, he will rarely take a dummy to settle and when he dose its usually when we are in the car. Russell seems to settle better when allowed to comfort himself in the way that he wants to be comforted and i think thats the key, do how they want it to be done and empower DS not suppress him with alternative mechanisms. so if he wants to suck his fingers id let him but wouldnt force it on him, more let him discover for himself.

Hmm the quick reply button disappeared again!

My DS has a dummy, mainly because of the reflux, I don't want him sucking on me all the time because he has thickener in his EBM, and when I DID let him have me the other day, he had heaps more wind than he's had for days....so its dummy for him!

His routine is going really well, 10, 2 and 6 feeds 2-3 hour sleeps in between, he's got a bit of cradle cap at the moment, really really mild, but we are going to anti-dandruff it every 2nd day for a week or so and that should knock it on the head.

He's drinking about 125ml of thickened EBM each feed at the moment with a top up "dream feed" at about 10pm, rather than just letting him sleep as long as he wants....I'm being quite rigid with it mainly because of his Zantac, I like to keep it evenly spaced...

Janine- my little man's snuffles keep him awake too. Because of his cleft palate if he gets any excess fluid in his mouth, it makes him snuffly in his nose (no separation).. poor tyke!

Liam liked Eurovision too! ha ha ha...

DH gave me a wonderful gift this morning and sent me back to bed after the 8 am feed. He insisted I stay there as long as I wanted and he'd look after DS. So I slept until midday! Wonderful!!

Belle - expressing's not that bad. I exclusively express & bottle feed and although there's more work involved (washing up, feeding AND expressing as separate activities, etc) I've adjusted fine and I don't mind the time it takes. At least I know my little man is getting the best stuff. Lucky you if you're supply is good. I'm struggling with mine at the moment...

Think we're heading for the 'wonder week' for week 6 (begins Thursday). Liam's already feeding more like 3 hrs than 4 again. Will walk him down to CYH tomorrow to weigh him again just to check his progress. He's been a little more grizzly than normal but he's also been more playful than normal - smiling and interracting really well in short bursts. I'm thinking we'll have to start up a routine to help us cope with feeds/sleep/bath/etc... at the moment we live by the seat of our pants! At least today I managed to get a shower in (DS doesn't like baths), tummy time, play time (even read a book!) and a walk! But he's quite grizzly tonight so it might have all been a bit much for the little fella! ;)

:hug: to everyone. particulary those with relationship issues or sleep deprivation!

He won't comfort suck on the boob, he gets milk and overfeeds then chucks. Or worse, usually he just screams, won't take it. But still wants to suck. Very stressful. He tries to shove his fist in, but struggles so DH is teaching him how to get a finger in. I'd love to comfort feed him, but it just isn't happening. It's a wreck.

BW, olive oil overnight, then gentle brushing with a baby brush, or gentle washing knocks cradle cap on the "head" so to speak. It can hurt to take them off too roughly or fast. But that ol' fashioned remedy has done the trick million times over. Ci has a little cradle cap, which leads me to believe he might get it like DD did, which was pretty thick layer on the scalp. I don't really care too mcuh, but this time I might do the olive oil thing and stop it progressing.

Afternoon all,

How is everyone copping? This is going to be a ME post, as haven't posted in while.

Me ok, it could be alot better, but am managing at moment. DH has gone away for work for the WHOLE WEEK. Was so teary when he left. I kept thinking what IF's someone where to happen to him while he was away. Am so dam emtional still, I thought it would end. Granted it's not everyday just the overtired run-down days/early morning days too.

DS is driving me MAD at moment. I don't know if it is a man thing or 2's thing or a attention seeking thing, be he just doesn't seem to listen. Or he just pushes my buttons. Don't know if he or I will surive the week without DH to give me time away from him.

DD goes for her brown belt in Kung Fu this afternoon. She is very excited about it. Am going down to watch. My car is playing up at moment (battary), I was going to drop DS off at Grannies for an hr, and go watch her in peice and get my photos of her, but don't want to turn car off just incase wont start. It's booked in for full service on Wednesday. So am sort of house bound till then.

DH well he hasn't been much help. Granted it my fault 'cos I don't let him. It's not that it's more of I'll get it done faster. So when he comes back I will be giving Wyatt to him more often when he gets home, also so they can bond together. With DS DH would always be home to give bath, but with Wyatt he has only done 2 since being born.

Wyatt well he bounding along. Went to his first Grass Enduro (motor cross). Was windy and raining, but I had him in his Ergo carrier which he loves and slept most of the day away. The noise didn't faze him much. However he/me has gotten into the habit of holding him until he is asleep. Would like some tips which work on how to get out of it ASAP.

Feel better now it's off chest...

Cheers
Sarah

Anyway

I feel like I am useless as a mother!

my eldest DS is a lazy so and so and is just taking us for a ride, doesn't look for work, goes out and stays out till all hours of the morning etc, can't kick him out though as he has no where to go and that would stress me out even more. DS#2 is feeling a little jealous, I got very emotional yesterday when he told DH that he didn't want me and Oliver to come out for the family day yesterday. And Oliver has been VERY unsettled all day today, he only goes down for 1 sleep cycle, then wakes up again and screams, I have a massive headache and just feel like I am going to snap/explode.

Sharon: Poor thing... It's really not you. They are MEN, and I have come to the judgement they just can't be pleased.
I hope you feel better soon. Good to see you..

Better go Wyatt just woke up
Sarah

Hi all,
Just a quick one...I resigned today, both me and my boss cried!
Thanks for the advice re cradle cap...DS head currently smells like we are about to make brekky on it! Lots of it gone now though which is good!
Went to OB for post natal, he's stunned that I expess and bottle feed....said most people don't have the patience to bother....just doesnt seem that gard to me!
back later!

Hi All... thought it is time to join your little group!! Just snuck into this group as my little one Caleb was born on the 30th april 1 week early!

I hope to get on here and get to know you all... not too familiar with many of you, but i am sure that will change :)

Janine- I give Lila a dummy even though I swore up and down no child of mine would have one. I think for her its the comfort thing, and she can't comfort feed from a bottle (well not really, but she does a little) and I can not can not have her on my breast. The few times she did comfort suck on my breast I sat for 3-5 hours grinding my teeth in pain. I think part of this whole parenting gig is not just doing what is 100% "the best" thing for baby, but striking a balance between good for baby/good for mummy and daddy. I mean, those balances are essential to every other relationship in life, why should this one be one sided?

BabyWrangler- My doctor was shocked I express and feed, too. Of course. Sure its time consuming, but like Nettie said I've gotten used to it, part of the routine. Would be nice not to sometimes.. Like I've had a few nights of frustration when I vowed to switch to formula, but it was the middle of the night and I had no choice but to express and feed. Then of course, everything is easier in the morning.

Sarah- That would be so hard, having DH away. You're so brave and strong. Don't know how to help you about the cuddling to sleep, I've been doing that too.

Sharon- Its ok. I saw your oldest son is 19, I was there (and a jerk) recently myself. Not trying to pry or anything, just help out a bit- is he depressed? It seems like a lot of kids in late teens/early 20's are massively depressed and don't do much with their lives because there are too many options/because of fear of failure... I was like that and so was pretty much everyone I knew. The other one I've seen a fair bit of is that things are cushy and easy at home so why would they leave? I had a friend's mother who realized she was making life too easy for her ne'er do well son so she started charging him rent and utilities and for food, and he had to do his OWN laundry etc.. Anyway know its off topic but just thought I'd put that out there...

Bah. Lila's back to never sleeping. Its like she has three days of never ever sleeping and then one day where all she does is sleep. Its hard on mum- when she's growly and needing attention I don't get any housework done, and when she's sleeping all day I greedily stay in bed getting as much sleep as possible for myself. I just don't know. I love love love my Lila but I hate parenting a baby. Except the baby smell. and the cuddles. and the little smiles. and the way she looks round for me. All of that compensates a bit i suppose.

Hi everyone

I figure its time i joined here. I know prob half of you from april 16-30th thread and look forward to getting to know the rest of you. My bub was due 28th April but she decided life on the inside was pretty cosy! So she stayed there until 12th May and nearly drove her mum insane waiting :lol:. So i know that really makes her a may bub and i will prob go introduce myself there too but as i went through my PG with half of you lovely ladies i would love to be in this group with you all!

So i look forward to making new friendships and catching up with all of you that i know.

Sharon what happened with DS living away from home? Did that not work out? Please don't beat yourself up you are not a useless mother at all, its just everything seems to go sour at the one time which is why we feel this way! You will get through it hun. I know exactly how you feel with eldest DS, ours likes to take the easy road too! If i find a miracle cure for it i promise i will share it with you :hug:

Sarah hun you sound like life is pushing your buttons a bit too! Hang in there, this first few months after having new bub are the hardest on our emotions. Definately do get DH involved more when he gets home, sometimes it just doesnt matter if they dont do it as good or fast as us, if it pains you too much to watch him just leave the room, because we need to accept any help offered at times.

Hi to everyone else and i look forward getting to know you all.

My little Molly is doing well, she is BF beautifully and is the ONLY bub out of all 7 of mine to NOT destroy my nipples in the first week! So BF has literally been a breeze and pleasure from day 1 this time round! She is sleeping well and generally only wakes once during the night for a feed and has had a couple of 7 hr nights already...

Ok well i have to go wash girls hair now so i will pop in again soon.

Hi all,

Just dorpping in again to say hi. I shamefully haven't time to read all the posts properly - I have Luke on the floor and I have to go and pick up DH from work shortly - but I wanted to say hi.

Kat so pleased to hear that Molly finally arrived. I was watching out to see the announcement!

Sharon YOu are not a crap mum - you are a great mum and your eldest is just taking advantage of your generousity again!! Teh jealousy is only natural and he will get through it. Big hugs to you and I hope you are feeling better soon.

Sarah and babywrangler and tarnee big hellos!!! hope your little ones are behaving today!

As for me, Luke is doing really well. He is a big pig and wants to eat all the time but has been BF'ing beautifully. I uusually get about 6 hours sleep in a row each night with him so I really can't complain. DH is taking a while to adjust to teh fact that I am no longer at his beck and call but otherwise things are good. Will stop in again soon.

KAT!
Great to see you, no matter when Molly arrived, she's an April baby, just like BJ...she's just trying to be unique!!!

sarah thanks, I know that there is just no pleasing men, just gets very frustrating for me especially when I am the only female in the house.
BabyWrangler LOL at your Ob saying that most people couldn't be bothered to express and bottle feed, he's referring to people like me :p
bellelass my 19 yo's life here isn't all that comfy, he moved out for a while but got asked to leave by the people he was staying with because he was lazy, we used his old room for the nursery and we only have a 3 bedroom house, so he is currently sleeping on a mattress on the floor in the office, with his clothes still in his suitcase, he is hardly ever home for dinner, and he has done his own washing for about the last 5 years as I refused to go rummaging through his bedroom to find dirty washing. Thank you for you advise, I was just having a bad day. Lila probably uses that 4th day of hers to catch up on the sleep that she misses out on over the other 3 days, it's frustrating, I know.
Katstribe yay, nice to see you here. DS was asked to leave by the people he was staying with because he was lazy, and he had nowhere else to go so DH and I weren't going to make him sleep in his car, so he has a mattress on the floor in the office. Lets :pray: that there is a miracle cure out there somewhere. That's great that Molly is doing so well with BF and you lucky bugger getting some 7 hour nights of sleep, the longest Oliver seems to go (occaisionally) is 5, maybe 6 hours but he still then needs his 2am feed, can't wait till he stops needing that one, I think I will start to feel a little bit more human when that happens.
shellbell it's nice to see you pop in here when you can, sounds like Luke is going great, and congrats on the 6 hour stretch of sleep at night, that would be sooooooooo nice.

After my crappy day yesterday I am going to try and be a little bit more positive today, that may all go out the window (including Oliver ;) ) if he is unsettled again today. Had a talk with DH last night and he wants me to speak to someone about how i've been feeling, I think he is worried that I am getting PND and thinks that it is best to talk to someone sooner rather than later, so I will be taking Oliver to the community nurse on Friday and I might have a chat with her. He also said that if I am ever having a bad day I am to call him at work, and as long as he doesn't have any meetings he will come home and work from home.

I have woken up with a sore throat today, I really don't want to get sick, I am the type of person who hardly ever gets colds/flu the last time I had the flu (not just a bad cold like men like to confuse the flu with) was about 2 years ago, but if this cold progresses, it will be the 2nd cold i've had in 4 weeks.

Last night Oliver was such a good boy, but he was so cute, while he was getting his nappy changed he was 'trying' to talk, he had these cute little gurgling noises going in the back of his throat, and we have definitely been getting the odd smile, it's these little things that make up for the crappy days because it just melts your heart.

Sharon,
I agree, the smiles are a heart melter.
BJ gave us a few early on (at 3 weeks...which we assumed were wind til the health nurse saw him smile on day when he was looking me in the eyes, and she said they were real).
The other morning, DH was cuddling him while I got ready to go out and he got 7 in a row wile talking to him...oh my god so gorgeous.he just won't do it when the camera comes out....he goes all serious!
BJ seems to be almost trying to cut out a feed at night (which is great, but confusing!), he feeds about 9:30 or 10pm, then has been going through til between 3 and 4, then through til 8 or 9....rather than waking at 2 and waking at 6.
Whilst this isn't a problem, it makes mummy confused about trying to squish in another feed or not!

Also, we had him set to an 8:30pm bedtime which meant DH would see him for about an hour when he got home from work, just meant we had a late tea as we wait til he settles first before cooking and eating. BJ has decided on a 7pm bedtime....Poor DH doesn't get home til about 7:30pm!

Regarding Smiles they are absolutly precious!!! We have been getting heaps now (but Mj is a bit older then most) she has also now discovered hw to makes noises!! besides screming that it.

Sharon- wow you son sounds like my sister!!! same age as well. that must be what it is. hope you have a better day with Oliver today

BW- wow a bed time? lucky you. i have absolutly no routine at all.


Hello to all the new mums who have popped in Shell and Kat

well i best be cleaning the house while my older two are at daycare and Mj is asleep

how do i get my baby to sleep during the day??? (have tried everything but letting her cry) is there something wrong with her that makes her stay wide awake from 4 am-9pm?? any ideas?

Morning all! I had a wonderful night with caleb, we decided to 'try' and get some sleeping happening. I got some settling techniques of a website and he has taken to them really well. I can not leave him when he is crazy crying, but if it is a grizzle then i can do that. But when the crazy crying starts i pick him up and settle him and then put him down. It says (the website) to turn them on their side and pat them till the crying stops, this has really worked!!!!! So excited about it... just 'dangerous' when you turn them back onto their back... just hoping they don't wake up again :D

Steph- have you got a swing?? I have one and its a god send, plus a vibrating bouncer works a treat too. how do you put her down. Mj will not sleep on her back and she sleep on her side. I have one of those safe sleepers that allow for sleeping on her side.

yay Taurasa on Celeb sleeping

hay steph ,

Just curious, has lila started having play time? i find that Russell will go down no problem after hes had some playtime, around an hour or so , but if he dosnt have it he will be a real pain in the bum. maybe stimulating her might help to set a awake routine and help her mp out her day. playtime whether with us or on his mat has done wonders for russell and happens every morning between his 8-9.30 sleep and his 10.30 sleep and am starting to do this in the arvos aswell after his afternoon nap.

welcome to all you newbies

As for me , my boys being an angel while dads away( wonder why???:lol:)

Wow, miss out for a day or two and there is too much to read and absorb in one go, so I apologise for the filtered responses:

Fire in relation to the sucking fingers - I'd agree with you that it is like a suppressor unless the baby is choosing to do it him/herself. I used to give DS my little finger to suck when he needed comfort sucks as he had silent reflux, screamed if given comfort boob. Lactation consultant told me to use the finger. My DS has his bottle as his comforter now, but I put that down to always offering a bottle once we stopped BF, so I would think that offering your finger is better than his - less likely to result in a comforter. Being that they supposedly don't make associations until 3 months, if it helps you get through....
As for the snuffles at 2am on is that possibly because of the air at that time of the morning, the cold maybe, would it be worth looking at the room temp/humidity whatever it is that they suggest for asthma?

Sharon :hug: sorry to hear that DS is making life hard again. I think that you and DH are doing all the right things with him. I remember at 24 my Dad telling me that I was using the house as a hotel and needed to live by his rules if I was going to stay. Doubt that would work with DS. Maybe you need to smother him. Hope he doesn't end up like my BIL 34 never had a job and still at home. He does have psychological issues though.

As for the cold's thing, you will find that you will get sick as your immune system is down, don't worry it improves back to how you're used to it. PND - try taking fish oil and vitamin b tablets to assist if it is a chemical imbalance which comes with sleep deprevation that adds to the stress. I did and it helped me as it was more stress than actual PND.

Steph I actually find putting them in a sling or carrier assists with them getting some sleep, if you don't need it too. If you need it too, lay down with bubs tummy to tummy on your chest.

Sarah :hug: to you for having to deal with three kids on your own. I know how DS's can be at that age and I think it is a combo of age and wanting to keep their place on the pecking order.

Kat,Taurusa welcome to our growing group.

We are happy with our sleep routine, feed and bed around 8.30pm awake at around 1.30am for about an hour and then asleep until 7.30am various times during the day, so getting closer to sleeping through.
Hello and hope you are all doing well for those I missed.

Got to go and get on with the day.

BabyWrangler Oliver also has a set bedtime, but it can vary by half an hour on either side though, he normally has his bath around 5 - 5.30pm and then a bottle after that and he is usually sound asleep by 6 - 6.30pm I then give him a sneaky feed around 10ish. It's a shame that DH doens't get to see BJ at night but that could still change again later, sometimes my DH doesn't get to see to Oliver either.
Beatrix the kids of that generation do all seem to behave and act very similar. Oliver is asleep atm but I just couldn't be bothered cleaning.
bellelass I really don't have any suggestions for getting your bubs to sleep during the day. Does she sleep at all, like catnap during the day, because you will find that that is how some babies are, my second was a catnapper right up till he was 6 months old.
Taurusa I try and do that with Oliver during the day, also, when you are patting bubs on the back, or even when you are just going in there to reassure, don't make eye contact, I find that if I do that he takes that as a sign that I am going to get him up.
Zennie it is good to let bubs have set playtimes after a feed and before a sleep just as long as they don't end up getting over stimulated, I can't wait till Oliver starts having set playtimes.
alittlegrubi thanks for the tip on the fish oil and Vit B will give them a go, but I am shocking when it comes to taking tablets etc because I hate them all, even if they don't have a taste. I think DH will be more at ease if I talk with the comm Nurse about my feelings though and it can't hurt. As for smothering my eldest DS, he kind of has to be home for me to do that and atm he is always out somewhere, when he does come home it's at 4am then when he gets up he's off out again.

DH took Jordan to school this morning so I didn't have to rush around getting ready which was nice so I have decided that I am going to have a PJ day, well at least until I have to leave to go and pick up Jordan. I got a letter today from my employer (I do nightfill for a large retail outlet) and they where saying that I have been absent for an extended period of time with no explanation WTF my nightfill manager (who is a complete tosser) new very well I was pregnant, and the last time I worked was when I was about 30 weeks and my best friend who works there as well has told everyone and taken in photos for all to see so he knew I had had Oliver, I had also asked for maternity leave forms to be sent out to me and I never got them. The store manager apologised and said that he would make a not of it on my records and also that I could come in and fill in the maternity leave forms any time.

Sharon - I tend to just go with Russells cues and not force anything on him. every day is differnt and he lets me know what kind of playtime he wants and how much and sometimes he just wants to be quiet and sit with me. its working well and hes very contented most of the time.