This afternoon I'm finding patting Maya to sleep helps her settle quickly.. but then she wakes every half hour! So it feels like a choice of spending half an hour to rock her to sleep and then she'll sleep for a while.. or get her to sleep quickly but then constantly resettle. Though I think the problem is that she's waking up on her side and she's only ever slept on her back.. but I don't know if there's a way I can get her from her side to her back.
belfie - How'd you go last night with X? Maya woke at 1.30am after going to bed at 10pm! Then woke next at 6am. But she stayed awake for an hour and a half at 1.30!
Amanda - Good to hear the mastitis didn't develop.
kuraiza - When Maya was a newborn I was often up for ages trying to resettle her, but then she got quicker and quicker at settling. Even to the point that during the night I could put her down awake and she'd go to sleep. So I thought I was making great progress even though I still had to rock her to sleep during the day. (though the day sleep rocking wasn't taking as long as it used to). Now it's like any progress she made is totally out of the window and I'm back to the start again! Taking ages to rock her to sleep during the day and at night. Oh and I also have heaps of trouble getting to sleep.. so when I go to bed it takes me an hour normally to fall asleep - sometimes less or more. So two hours awake = 3 hours awake really for me.
As for her going to bed late.. I think that routine developed early on and now I don't know how to change it?! Cos it effects all her day sleeps too. So my typical day starting with night time (I don't have any sort of routine really which is probably very bad but I find it hard to keep to any routine the minute I leave the house!):
- M goes to bed for the night between 9pm and 10pm. Then I go to bed around 11pm - midnight. I imagine every else probably also going to bed about an hour or two after bubs.
- M wakes a couple of times but sleeps till around 9am - 10am (sometimes she's up for a little while at wake times, other times a long time and sometimes straight back to sleep so length of sleep varies). But this is probably really the same as those babies going to bed at 7pm and getting up at 6 - 7am.. just pushed out later.
- Then she has a late morning/early afternoon nap and another nap in the late afternoon usually waking from this nap around 6pmish. Hence.. I can't really get her into bed at 6.30pm after waking at 5.30-6pm.
I think my 'routine' is probably similar to everyone's but pushed out later. Which I don't mind in some ways cos I am NOT a morning person and I don't feel tired in the evenings. But it makes it hard to get to any appointments in the morning and sometimes Maya will wake somewhere between 5 and 7 am and not go back to sleep.. which means I have only had a very short amount of sleep. The other problem I see is that she's often up from 6ish till 9-10ish which I know is too long but I find it hard to get her into bed earlier.
When you say that Jude crashes what do you mean by that? Does he just fall asleep? My other problem is that I have never ever been able to see any tired signs from Maya.. so I go by the time she's up for. I try and put her down after 1 1/2 to 2 hours up time. Also Maya wakes at the slightest noise or if I touch her at all. Actually I think if Maya had a choice she'd stay up all day/night long if she could.
Question: What time usually do all your babies wake from their last naps of the day?
Anyway, I should stop there before I ramble on too much more.. Did anyone make it to the end of this post.
Tanya: It was strange because Jude used to sleep at the same time as Maya and I also didn't know his tired signs but one day he completely changed everything. He just went to bed early one day and I thought it was a nap but he didn't wake up again until the middle of the night and now that's been his pattern ever since. I have no idea why it changed, but I'm not a morning person either. However, it has been easier to make appointments and get dinner ready.
Jude's tired signs have become clear. He rubs his eyes and yawns and through that I've learned his early tired signs when his arm and leg movements become jerky instead of controlled. Now he has quite good hand-eye coordination so I can visually see when he starts flailing his arms and I know he's tired. The BIG clue for me is: if I can hear ALL his toys getting kicked and punched then I know he's not playing nicely anymore and he must be tired. Does Maya do that? Does she stop focussing on one toy and start hitting them all?
But I don't put him to bed straight away, I usually sit him on my lap and we have a look at a book together or I just talk to him for a few minutes and then I take him to bed. Sometimes he objects but not for too long. However, Jude uses a dummy and that is a very big part of how he falls asleep and I know Maya doesn't like a dummy so unfortunately I'm not sure if I can offer advice for you. Maybe she will suck on your finger or a toy? If there's anything she'll suck on to calm down, I would use that to settle.
Jude's last nap of the day is sometimes just an hour before bedtime, it gets a bit tricky because we want to bath and feed him around 6, but he already wants to be in bed by then, but any earlier is too early for us to work around and my husband would never see him if he was in bed any earlier.
Tanya - just a quick response from me. I had trouble with X rolling in his cot then squawking. Go a nice tightly tucked in cot sheet, then she maybe she can't get onto her side?... mightn't be the same, but with X, he draws his legs up, arms up... and over he goes. The sheet stops the limbs going up and he stays on his back. And it doesn't seem to bother him & he definitely sleeps better for it (this after me putting him back on his back about 10 times the first night he realised he could roll.... lol).
Had my aunt & uncle over this arvo - lovely visit but they've currently been evac'ed from their home for a week now due to the fires. Very stressful for them but at least they're safe.
Tanya - Zander wakes anywhere from 5 - 6pm last nap of the day, and his last nap is just that - usually only around 40 mins.
kuraiza - why beating yourself up? Do you feel guilty or as though you havent done the best you could? You have done the best you possibly could, there was a reason you introduced formula - you had tried other options which didn't work - try not to second guess yourself or feel too bad - Jude will be grateful for having a full tummy I am sure. I know you might think easy for me to say - I am still b/f - but i have had hard times with all 3 of mine - and we do the best we can at the time.
I wouldnt agree with any sleep school that says to control cry under 6 months either. Babies need to know you will respond to them - when they hit that magical marker they come into a new awareness and test us a bit more, so in my opinion, a bit of crying then is ok if it is ok with your family.
PP are you saying you might be UTD????!!!!!! Nauseous - freaking out .... will stalk you on FB now LOL
SAMI - I'm wondering how Z went down last night? It took me an hour to get BJ down. What is with that? That's 3 nights in a row. Gosh, I hope he's not going to be one of these babies that fights to go to sleep every night. He has always been such a good sleeper & always goes to sleep with minimum fuss. His days sleeps I just put him in his cot, he cries for a few minutes then goes to sleep. Last night I let him cry for 20mins, & when he started to get a little upset I went & patted him until he fell asleep (only a few minutes) then, 10mins later he woke crying again so I patted him to sleep again, then 10 mins later the same. I had only fed him at 7.20pm but had to feed him to get him to sleep, finally, at 8,30pm. I know this is nothing compared to what some mums have to do but I am worried it's the start of something. I'm gonna try to play around with his afternoon sleeps to see if it helps.
Plus... He woke this morning at 4.20am just gooing & ga ga'ing till 4.55am when he started to whimper. It kept me, & DH, awake the whole time. When I went in both his arms were out of his wrap. That was probably why he didn't go back to sleep. I fed him at 5am then he fell back to sleep again. I went back to bed till 6.20am when he woke up crying so I took him in my bed & we slept till 7.20am. If only he had slept till 5am. I don't believe my day should start before 5am.
TANYA I am like you. It takes me aaagggges to get to sleep & back to sleep after I've been woken. It's crap. When BJ was a newborn I could get back to sleep no worries. I guess I was just so exhausted. But now.... Gosh, it's awful. I need to exercise more, that helps me sleep
KURAIZA I wouldn't of taken offense to what you said to that mum at MG. I let BJ cry, alot. He refuses to take a dummy & won't settle in my arms (as you saw at yoga) so I have no choice. Babies are so different & there is so many ways of settling, that mum would know that. I wouldn't worry about it. I'm sorry to hear you are having a hard time dealing the breast refusal. I know it's upsetting for you. Take heart in knowing you're a great mum who wants the best for her little man.
PP Sorry to see you go! Will definately catch you on FB xxx
AMANDA I hope all is well in the Mastitis front. Gee it's a nasty thing. Did I read somewhere you are talking about number 6? Wow, I think i've mentioned before I take my hat off to anyone with 3 or more. Gosh, I struggle with 1
KATONES Are you going away this week? Thankfully we're not. With DH home I can go & get my hair done & my waxing done & visit friends so I can leave BJ home. But, we have already had a little tiff , & he's only been off since Sunday
CSAB Yep my ewcm is in abundance too. But it was last time too & AF never showed. I'm still hoping it'll stay away. Guess I should be lucky to have gone this far
Hi to everyone, Teru, Hollye, Belfie, Amy & any one I may have missed
Georgi - poor fella is fine for a while, then just starts whimpering and cries, cries - i tried to give him paracetomol again - but he wont swallow it and pools it at the back of his throat for ages - I'm talking 15 mins when I am sure he must of swallowed it!! I dont know why i bought panadol (no offence) - i have always bought Dymadon in the past - same base ingredient, but it is thicker and orange flavour and seems kinder to my kids tummies. I only give it to him before night bed - but i think he only got half a dose in anyway - Bonjela - screamed the house down, it does hurt initially but then after a minute he is much happier.
Long story short (LOL) he slept really well - he did cry at about 9pm but I picked him up and cuddled him for a minute and put him back down - he slept until 4.45am and I fed him. But after feed he was crying (which he NEVER does after night feeds) - so put some more bonjela on - and he slept until 7.30. Checked gums today and they are mushy, I reckon one tooth would have erupted by the weekend.
I am going to get some Brauer teething relief today and try that.
Georgi, Zander has never breastfed to sleep which makes me sad cos there is ntohing like them falling asleep when feeding - it is so beautiful and lasts for such a small amount of time. Havign said that, he does close his eyes straight away once wrapped and i pick him up and cuddle him close to my chest ...
I baked 2 batches of anzac cookies - riley's school having a minifete to fundrasie for bushfire victims - 11 - 1pm - - so better go pack - Z due to wake anytime - been down for an hour already.
katones - I was the one asking about cloth nappies. And actually someone from MG yesterday gave me some to try. So I am trying them today. First time in cloth nappies. Though the first nappy leaked!
belfie - I put Maya on her side - she didn't roll that way. It's part of a patting to sleep routine. But then I don't think she likes sleeping on her side so it doesn't work for me.
Georgi - I'm still struggling with getting Maya to sleep too! And I'm worrying if it's the start of something and all the progress made is gone?!
Sami - mmmm.. can you send me an anzac cookie. I hope Z's teeth come through soon!
kuraiza - It sounds like you did what you had to do re feeding. Could you maybe talk to a lactation consultant about getting him back on the boob if that's what you want to do?
Tired signs - sometimes Maya does rub her eyes or is more jerky and then I do know that she's tired. But seriously sometimes she's just doesn't have any signs until she starts crying.. or sometimes there's not even any crying I just decide she's been up for a while and she prob needs a nap! Maybe there are signs I am missing though.
Dummy - I tried everything to get Maya to take a dummy. Then yesterday at MG that woman who showed me the patting settling routine showed me how she got her son to take a dummy - using the patting settling routine and holding a dummy in his mouth. So I tried it last night and she took it!! And settled extremely quickly! She was in bed at 8.30pm!! The earliest she's ever been. And I was so thrilled! And then.... she woke at 9, 9.30, 10, 10.30.. and I think she wakes whenever the dummy falls out! Also I'm not sure if she sleeps properly with a dummy in her mouth.. I think she dozes but doesn't go into a deeper sleep. Arghhhhhhh Well.. I realised that wasn't going to work all night long.. getting up every half an hour! So then I tried the patting routine.. nope she started screaming. Anyway, at 11.30pm I finally decided to re-feed her and use my good old fashioned rock her to sleep method. And she was in bed by 12.30am! And slept till 5am. Then back to sleep at 5.30 and up at 9am.
I must admit I am soo extremely frustrated and upset about the whole thing! It seems now the patting doesn't work at all. And now I have a choice of very quick settle with dummy but waking constantly. OR rocking to sleep for AGES but she'll stay asleep. I really don't know what to do! What's really getting to me is the fact that she was getting easier and easier to settle and things were getting better. And now I feel like I am back at the beginning. I am so exhausted and feel like things are never going to get better (even though realistically I know they will get better I just don't feel like things are going to get better). Georgi mentioned sleep school and two weeks ago I really didn't think it was necessary cos I thought Maya was improving. Now I wonder if it's something I should really consider.
So it feels like a choice of spending half an hour to rock her to sleep and then she'll sleep for a while.. or get her to sleep quickly but then constantly resettle.
Oh and I also have heaps of trouble getting to sleep.. so when I go to bed it takes me an hour normally to fall asleep - sometimes less or more. So two hours awake = 3 hours awake really for me.
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