Jen - ask Barb in the BFing support forum and/or hire a LC - if it's something a LC can help you resolve for about $100, the it's worth a red hot go, no? Also, the ABA helpline is free, even just to talk to someone about how you feel about what's happening and where you're headed - the counsellors are excellent and available 24hrs. It's very rarely an 'easy' decision