Hi All,
sorry i havent had a chance to get on, i spent most of yesterday in tears and was an emotional wreck.
ds1 has bronchitis and ds2 tonsilitis which i think has now turned into brochitis (dh taking him back to the doctor this afternoon)
so its been challenging to say the very least. mchn visit on tuesday got me down because Ryker lost weight again making his total weight loss since birth 500grams. She advised to feed every 3hrs even if that means waking him, bf, then offer ebm and express.... all good and well but a lot harder in reality... my nipples still very sore (to the point he was drawing blood) so i decided to just express and give him the ebm so i could also see how much he was getting. with all the stress i feel my supply has also dropped off. Im getting between 50-70ml per express but he has been having about 70mil ebm each feed, so the little stash i started acumulating is almost gone.....
the thought of getting out of the house, having to express whilst out, how to heat up an ebm bottle whilst out has been all overwhelming...
i just cant let go of the fact i want to bf but i said i wouldnt do this to myself again (ds2 refused the breast and i fought for 6wks every feed putting him on the breast, having lots of tears from both of us and in the end i expressed for 4months)
Mylitta- i made a comment to one of the MW in hospital for anyone who thinks breast feeding is easy should walk in my shoes for a week. i wish so very much it come naturally and i blame my body for being the way it is and making it so dam hard. and now i have started giving him the bottle its making attempting bf even harder, he just gets cranky when it doesnt come out right away.
Anyway to end on a better note i took him to the clinic this morning to get weighed again and he beefed on 200grams in 2 days!! so he now weighs 3.51kg (bw 3.8kg) then we went into the shops so i could hand in the medicare crap, we went to the parents room, dh gave him the ebm whilst i expressed more, then we went to ds1 school for his easter hat parade (he has been off school all week and went thismorning and we brought him home after the parade. and ds2 didnt go to preschool today so we had him with us also) so the mw today suggested when im at home to just try him at the breast first before offering him the ebm, i did that when we got home and after tryng both sides for 10min he was hysterical..
anyway i put him in the hugabub for the first time and he loved it!! i havent used it for 4yrs but did alright for first go exept i think i need to do it a bit tighter and was getting loose after a while.
it was good to get out of the house and some fresh air.
sorry this post is all about me again