After a long fight at the LC Wyatt fed from mummy for a while... Let's see if it works tonight.
I'm seriously exsausted, I can't wait to get home.
I'm so emotional and can't stop thinking about kobz. My gut drops every time.
My boobs are so full all the time it's giving me a huge backache.
This post really had no meaning, just looking to ramble...
Well the day hasn't got any better. Everytime I close my eyes I loose it. I'm so glad Jayden has been good today.
Kobz has txt a few times. She hasn't said much just let her know we all here for her.
Not a great subject considering recent events but... For those of you who already have kids...
Will the feeling ever go away that bub will die?
I've just ripped W from a peaceful slumber AGAIN to check of he was Alive. Poor wee man.
I have no idea if it will go away, but rest assured you're not the only one doing it! If I can't see that H is breathing I have to touch him until he moves, and DH does the same ;-)
i do the same i always done with the others, gently put my hand on her chest or face(cheek forhead), usualy gets a arm wave or shuffle to a more comfy position.
u called df yesterday to make sure ds2 did stay at home with him when i left he was on the schooter out the front and df was working on the car, was paranoid hed try follow me, df use to think i was crazy, but he is use to it now. and if your realy paranoid like me, once they start walking on there own, the fear of losing them or them running off and getting lost starts. (not meaning to worry anyone!)
bub os starting to not want to be put down! its getting to the point i cant do much at all, im either holing her or feeding her and when she is asleep, Krystal starts! TBH im waiting on welfare to pop in, the health nurse came arround yesterday, and the house was a mess, dirty dishes 3 baskets of washing, one folded waiting to be put away, another needing to be folded and one waiting to be washed, pluss trent and krystal had toys everywere... she kept trying to tell me i need extra help and more support because im not ontop of the housework at the moment! also had a go at me because Krystal still likes to drink her todler milk, and isnt a small girl. thats my biggest fear, that they will come into our lives, they were a big part of df's life growing up and because of that they 'had' to check on us when seth was a bub, just to be sure it was ok for him to be left in our care, last thing i want is them coming back because i let the house work go so i could keep the kids happy.
sorry, i just needed to get it off my mind, but cant vent about it with df as its a realy touchy subject. i craped myself this morning the realestate knocked on the door thinking it was dhs. apparently the last 2 weeks the new owners have been trying every trick in the book to get me out but the agents wont let them as there 'reasons' arnt substanciated or something
Aww Sarah I wouldn't worry about that. If falling behind in the housework constituted neglecting your children then I think many families would lose their babies! You're dealing with a newborn and a toddler! If the washing up doesn't get done then I think that's pretty
understandable!
I have the maternal health nurse coming today, then mum wants to go to the shops so depending on how sore my tummy is we might do that. On a side note, if I suddenly stop posting and you see on the news that a new mum murdered her mum in reservoir Vic, believe me it was justified lol.
went to reply before and my laptop turned off grr... can't wait to get my other computer back from being fixed.
sarah: chase is starting to want to be cuddled all the time too. If he doesn't fall asleep on the boob after a feed then he wants cuddles until he does fall asleep. hard to do in the middle of the night when your about to fall asleep on him. what are you going to do to get your little lady to stop wanting cuddles???
Did that welfare chick not realise that the baby was only a week old? Course your not up to date on the housework, no one is, especially when you have other kids as well. They should know it takes a while to settle into a routine with a baby. Chase is 6 weeks and I still haven't got a routine.
ali: hehehe my mum is over all the time, sometimes I have to just tell her to go home LOL since chase was born this is only the 3rd day where it will be just him and me and no one else
On the checking baby is still breathing, I always place my hand on his chest lightly, every time i go in there to look at him. SID's scares the crap out of me. Well had to change a monumental poo this morning that leaked out the front, back and sides and somehow got on my shirt. Then he vomited and I didn't realise how much and sat in it. I feel very disgusting right now LOL
Sarah my house is just as messy babe, and I don't have 4 kids!!!
Having a BFing breakthrough right now! Wee man has emptied both my boobies and I tell ya they were full! He fell on the 2nd one and it felt so lovely I left him there.
The LC I saw today said something that made a lightbulb go off for me...
Yeah I really want it and I've tried hard but I've not really committed myself to him 100%. I've been so worried about other stuff, like getting home and then everything at home, like housework or stressing about stuff that hasnt happened yet. Like how I'll cope after Stephen is gone...
I need to let all that go and just be with him, skin on skin. Relaxing, loving, resting together. And let everything else go.
I'm sorry Kitty I had to laugh at you sitting in vomit lol. The other day after changing H's nappy and his clothes I re-wrapped him and put him down then realised I had poo under my nails lol... ewwww
Jaki Yay for the BF breakthrough! How did you go this evening? I love the skin on skin time. It's sooooo relaxing just to have him cuddled up to me.
I need to vent... Unfortunately I can't just tell mum to leave yet. She's from NSW and doesn't know our area, so I can't even send her to the shops for a while for a break. I even tried having some alone time with H in our room but she came in to stare at us. Plus I can't drive due to the c-section and DH only has his L's and isn't yet driving on the road. It wasn't going to be an issue with a vag birth but now we're kinda stuck, so she's not leaving until the 2nd. I have to say she's being very helpful as well, doing lots of cleaning and taking H when I ask, but she's also coming to our room and taking him in the morning without saying anything, or picking him up while he's sleeping during the day "because he woke up" (no mum he's just making sleeping noises). I've been trying to explain why I don't want her to do these things, but she's very sensitive and gets upset whenever she feels like I'm criticizing in any way, especially when she's "just trying to help".... I can deal with her better now that the baby blues are gone and I'm not crying over everything... but geeez she exhausts me! I really feel quite trapped at the moment. *sigh* Ok vent over...
I will be a bit of a random popper inner for a couple of weeks we got a beautiful house that we have to move into on the 8th of April so we have a lot of packing cleaning and moving to do in the next 2-3 weeks.
As for checking bub for signs of breathing i am so glad i got an Angelcare slound and movement monitor it does it for me i take the hand monitor with me everywhere and it constantly ticks and a pendulem swings when it detects breathing movements and an alarm will sound if it stops i never had one with my other kids and just used the hand on the belly trick.
I will try to get back on tonight to catch up with how you all are going.
Yeah we had a good feed this evening too still topped him off with a wee bottle tho.
He seems to have his restless period in the evening, so he feeds a bit more.
Vent away babe, my mum would do my head in too... Although I must admit I text her yesterday, come help me!!! LOL. A bit far to travel tho
So the tears eventually stop do they? I cry at least once a day. Sometimes for no reason. Or just cause I look at W man and think about how lucky I am.
They do stop eventually! I cried on and off pretty much from last Thursday until Wednesday, over everything from not being able to BF, to being in pain, to not having any clean clothes to wear, to how lucky I am to have my little man
That's the one that's upsetting me the most... I get upset about the BFing and then I think of kobz and get upset that I'm upset about these things when I have my boy.
BellyBelly Life Subscriber
great news that Wyatt got some boobie time. I think my milk is catching up
she kept trying to tell me i need extra help and more support because im not ontop of the housework at the moment! also had a go at me because Krystal still likes to drink her todler milk, and isnt a small girl. thats my biggest fear, that they will come into our lives, they were a big part of df's life growing up and because of that they 'had' to check on us when seth was a bub, just to be sure it was ok for him to be left in our care, last thing i want is them coming back because i let the house work go so i could keep the kids happy.
still topped him off with a wee bottle tho.
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