BS - I do understand what you meant by describing Amelia as difficult. Please don't think you offended me, because you didn't. I know you weren't being negative. It's just strange to me that other people think of her that way when I don't. Thinking of her as difficult feels strange to me. And its strange no matter which word is used, difficult, demanding, challenging. My frustration and sadness come from my sense of failure. Amelia IS challenging, but I don't feel I'm up to the challenge, ITMS. Sorry if this is a bit confused....I'm wrecked and was just heading off to bed when I saw your post.