24 hours later...

[Willow]

There are no findings suggestive of ... extra-uterine pregnancy

Lisa, it sounds like they have ruled out an ectopic prg at this stage.

I think while your hcg levels are still rising then there must be some hope!

Hang in there....

[Lisa]

Scooby and Willow... thanks so much for your replies

This whole not knowing business is driving me insane. I spend what time I should be spending with my husband, on the internet, looking up things that make me go to bed in tears. I just want an answer. I want someone to say to me "Lisa, congratulations on the tiny little bubba we can see on the ultrasound" or "Lisa, sorry, you have miscarried" or "Lisa, sorry but this is a molar pregnancy"... the only thing I know for definite is that there is no definite answer!!!
I am worried that if it is a molar pregnancy or a miscarriage, that leaving the D&C for so long isn't such a good thing.
Considering that this is my 5th pregnancy... I feel like I know nothing about pregnancy right now... I am feeling so lost and confused

[scooby]

Lisa i really feel for you , it sounds so bad but when they said i was going to mc i was alomst relieved, sad but relieved, 4 weeks of ups and downs drives you insane it is so painful, i didnt want to say anything or talk to anyone and yes i sat on the internet looking for all the answers which realy werent there. The only thing i learnt is that everyone is so different as is every pregnancy. I'm sorry going into the ectopic thing, but it terrified me after to think that it went on noticed and what the concequences were if it hadnt been discovered, even when by HCG jumped up they were going to leave it over the weekend and have the scan on monday, but like Willow says at least it has been ruled out so i am sorry for worrying you. I know nothing i say will make you feel better, i am just so sorry you are experiencing this pain. Sending big hugs and know i'm here if you need an ear.:hugs:

[Lisa]

Hi Scooby,
Don't be sorry hun... one of the things that I was told that was a definite is that it isn't an ectopic pregnancy.
I just don't know if it is a pregnancy at all! I understand what you meant in regards to being almost relieved to miscarry, as much as I would be so sad, just having an answer would help me... not knowing is so so so hard right now... I don't know if I should be grieving or if I should be happy.

[scooby]

I know exactly what you mean and i must admit i still feel abit that way, i mean i'm grateful i can still concieve with one tube and am happy about that, but today i was thinkin i'd be 8 weeks today and then i get so sad again. Its a horrible, evil rollercoaster, lets just hope and pray its worth it in the end When i was going through the waitng to find out bit we had family out from the UK and i was having to go out with them everyday, and i know they didnt mean to but they said the most stupid things to me and i ended up an absolute wreck by the end of the day i'd go home and ball my eyes out (my poorDH) and my son who is 4 was like 'whats wrong mummy" and you feel like your letting everyone down, i dont know how many times i apologised, i guess i'm abit of a control freak. and of course they said no gym and no golf so i was totally lost with no other focus, it really does suck. Please talk and vent as much as you need on here because in the mean tiome i think it is the best solution (and it stops you googling) take care and big hugs!!!!

[PlonkeeMumma]

Thinking of you Lisa - the not-knowing must be so awful. hang in there, hoping you will get a nice surprise soon

Julie x

[julie_f]

Hi Lisa,

I'm so sad for you and your family. The same sort of thing happened to me three weeks ago (10 weeks pg). I wish I had have found this forum while I had my 7 days of agonising unknowing and waiting. It is great that u seem to have such great friends here to give u support. I felt like I couldnt face the world too, I understand how u feel
The day before it was confirmed that our baby had died, I went and picked out some socks, just so it felt like our baby was real and not imagined. I also kept the hospital bracelet, the ultrasound notes and pathology results. I'm so glad I did, as they r the ony tangible things that remain.
My heart breaks to think that you and your family are going through this. I pray that everything works out perfectly for your tiny baby. All the best. x

Julie.

[Mel1977]

Oh Lisa - Im so sorry you have to go through this. As you already know life can really try to sink the boots in sometimes. I so hope everything works out for you and at your next ultrasound they say you have a healthy little bubba kicking around. But either way, I hope you get some answers really soon so you can work out how to feel and not sit in limbo. for you and also

[Netti]

Hi lisa

im so sorry for what you are going through right now. It must be so confusing for you and with no answers you don't know what to think. I would say if your HCG is rising and you are having no bleeding, those are things that are in your favour. As previously suggested they recommend u/s when beta hcg is over 1000 as anything under that is usually not seen, Im hoping this is the case for you. best of luck and let us know how you go

[Lisa]

I went out shopping today with my DH and he bought me 4 gorgeous tops to cheer me up a little... he is such a sweetheart.
We went to my Mum's house where we watched the V8's... and I started to feel uncomfortable... not sore, just uncomfortable real low in my belly.
When we got home, I discovered I have started to bleed again...
****TMI ALERT****
The bleeding started off as being brown... like old blood brown... then it turned to a gravy color and consistency... now it is a pinkish/orange color... and it is fairly constant now... I have put a pad on to keep an eye on the amount... if need be, I will go to the hospital tonight, but I would rather wait until tomorrow because I have to travel 40+kms along a busy highway with semi's... it can get scary.

I am just worried about what is happening to my body

[julie_f]

Oh Lisa That is so sad to hear. I'm still praying for you, your baby and your family, and hoping that it is just an implant bleed. Let us know how u go. Good luck tonight.

[satya]

I hope you are OK. Please let us know how you went.

[scooby]

Hey Lisa
Just wanted to let you know i'm thinking of you and hoping andpraying that all we be well. Big hugs, look after yourself.

[Willow]

Lisa, I just wanted to see how you are going and to let you know I am thinking of you

I hope we hear some news from you soon sweetie.

[Lisa]

Thanks once again to everyone for their support and kindness
I'm not really up to writing at the moment. I have written everything here
Thanks again everyone... words truly can't express how grateful I am for all your support.
Lisa