Hi mummytwo - very sorry for your loss, m/c is such a difficult thing to go through
I once had a blighted ovum at 8 weeks, and although I m/c naturally, the cramps were pretty bad. So I'm unsure if the pessary's would be more painful or not. But I would choose them over a surgical procedure like d&c if I was given the choice. Sorry, not much help.
Hope whatever you choose goes ok for you- you are in my thoughts





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My first pregnancy was a blighted ovum and I started spotting at 6w4d and miscarried naturally. It wasn't physically too painful. My second pregnancy was a missed miscarriage that wasn't picked up until I was 11w3d when I started spotting. A scan showed that the embryo had stopped growing sometime in Week 7. I was booked in for a D&C the following day but woke with very painful cramping/contractions and was taken into emergency. My cervix was blocked with "product". I had a D&C (which are performed under general anaesthetic) and there was no pain afterwards. I was released from hospital that afternoon. If it happened to me again, I'd choose to have a D&C.
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