I'm so sorry to read of your loss It sucks doesn't it...
We recently lost our little bub, whose heartbeat we'd seen on several occasions already. We were offered a D&C or wait for it naturally. I decided on a D&C as I was afraid of the bleeding and pain going with it. It took a while to feel alright, but now all of a sudden it's almost a month after and it feels like ages ago. The one thing we really wanted the D&C as well was so we could find out what was possibly wrong with bub and with it we also found out the sex.
I'm sending you big hugs as I know you'll need them...