thread: Panic attacks after late loss

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  1. #1
    Registered User

    Jan 2008
    Busselton
    218

    oh my god you poor, poor girl. I am in tears for you and your husband and baby. What a shocking and heartbreaking ordeal you have been through. The way that nurse treated you and your baby was horrendous and you have every right in the world to be angry and hurt. It is no wonder you have been having nightmares. That nurse deserves to be sacked in my opinion.

    I agree that a support group would be a great idea...just to have people hear your story and give you some support during this terrible time...here in WA I called SIDS, they really helped me get through some bleak and lonely times....a keepsake box was also helpful for me.

    i know there are no words to take away your pain and heartache but there are many ladies here who have been through late loss and gone on to have successful pg's.

    best of luck,

  2. #2
    Registered User

    Dec 2007
    Sydney
    262

    Tildy

    Take care of yourself and I look forward to getting to know you through the TTC thread.

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Jun 2008
    Brisbane
    19

    Tildy....I'm so sorry to hear what you & your hubby had to go through, I'm sorry that you've lost your little bub. I'm just stunned reading about what the medical team had put you through specially at the time where you needed a lot of support. I'm happy to read that you've taken this matter further with the medical board etc. I wish you all the luck for TTC again. Hope you have a little healthy bub in your arms soon

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Jul 2008
    Sweden
    148

    The happy ending...

    Benjamin Liam Ceangailte Paulsson was born at 18:14 on April 17 after a VERY easily induced labor. My water was broken at 10:30 am, at which point contractions immediately came at a rate of 4 every 10 minutes with very little pain relief in between. By 15:30 I was told that I was already 10 cm open and could clearly feel the pushing stage beginning. By 17:30 they said Benny's heart rate was showing distress and I was thereafter tortured by an extra midwife putting all her weight on the top of my stomach as I pushed -- which you can imagine I did with all my might after hearing "danger!" By 18:14 they snipped me a bit to get him out.

    They laid him there on the bed at my feet, and I just sat and hyper-ventilated, wide-eyed, staring in shock -- I was so focused on "God, let this end soon!" that I had totally forgotten why we were there and HOW it would end! We've been so focused on getting through the pregnancy successfully that every second since he came out has been surreal and a little hard to digest, haha! Even if the results of almost 3 hours of pushing are stitches, super hemmoroids, a catheter I get to schlep home with me, and amazing training pain from head to toe, I'm completely in awe-struck love.

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Oct 2006
    Adelaide, SA
    3,962

    I am so happy for you that you finally have your little man in your arms!
    Congratulations!!

  6. #6
    Registered User

    Jul 2008
    Balnarring, Vic
    1,900

    Congrats Tildy! So happy for you!

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Jul 2008
    Sweden
    148

    Thank you all for the comfort and hugs. I can see here that there are several of you who have had late losses but then had a baby fairly soon afterward, and I know there are a couple in the TTC thread who are about halfway through a pregnancy after a late loss. It makes me feel more hope, that it's not just bull**** the doctors are throwing at me when they say it was a "fluke" and that I should believe everything will go OK next time.

    -Tildy

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Jul 2008
    Balnarring, Vic
    1,900

    I am so sorry for your loss
    I had tears while reading your story.The treatment you received at the hospital is despicable.No one should ever have to go through something like that.
    I wish you all the best for the future.

  9. #9
    Registered User

    Jul 2008
    Sweden
    148

    Thanks, Laura. Now I'm in the 8th week of a new pregnancy and have already been to the emergency clinic a couple times. The treatment I received has been much better. The two nurses that met me last week introduced themselves and looked at me and talked to me, told me exactly why they were taking blood, came back to update me on how long I might have to wait... so different. I hope that nurse from last time has been moved to floor mopping duty or something!

  10. #10
    Registered User

    Oct 2004
    Back in Brisvegas :)
    2,048

    Tildy, congratulations on your new pregnancy! I hope & pray that in 8 months from now we'll be hearing about your beautiful new arrival who won't be able to totally erase the pain of losing your tiny angel, but can help you write a new future.

    I am absolutely HORRIFIED at your story that led up to the loss of your angel. So pleased to hear you are getting much better treatment this time around. Couldn't help but *LOL* at your suggestion that you hope the 1st horrible nurse is now mopping the floors!

  11. #11
    Registered User

    Jul 2008
    Balnarring, Vic
    1,900

    Congratulation Tildy.
    I am so happy to hear that the treatment you are receiving this time around is a lot better.
    I wish you so much luck for a H&H pregnancy.

  12. #12
    Mel17 Guest

    prayers for your baby

    I recently lost one of my twins at 14.5 weeks, much like yours...going to the bathroom. terrible trauma. Im so sorry for your loss and I will pray for you new pregnancy. I think the reality is you will be scared much of the time....I'm still pregnant with my "twin B" and everything scares me, especially using the toilet. I have so many fears, but lots of hope. I think one of the challanges if finding people who understand the fear...this is the first time I'm ever doing a "Chat" and really came here because I feel very lonely....So reading your post, I know I'm not alone and nor are you. Please keep us posted

  13. #13
    Registered User

    Jul 2005
    Sydney
    4,517

    im sitting here with my mouth wide open at what has happened to you and how you have been treated. I am so gobsmacked that nurses treated you like that and especially the nurse who flushed the toilet WTF....... im so sorry for your loss and i am praying your new little baby inside is kepts safe and well and you have a healthy/ complication free pregnancy and are very wel taken care of.
    Thank you for sharing your story and i hope it has helped you somewhat