Tania - we're not too good with identifying meltdowns yet - some we can see coming and can divert (usually if he's had a bad night's sleep we can expect lots of frayed nerves), but some things are so random. Obviously not to him LOL. This morning's toe smashing episode was because he was washing his hands after going to the toilet, got distracted from his routine and wanted to turn the light on and off. With wet hands. Then totally lost it when I tried to guide him back to washing his hands. Part of it was what I call routine divergence stress and part of it was because he was fixating on something which was then denied. In hindsight it's obvious, but who could have predicted that he'd a) divert from routine or b) find something new to fixate from at exactly that point in time, when he'd done exactly the same routine without incidence several times that morning. Other times it's just random frustration which is even harder to predict, he'll be playing happily with a toy or puzzle, it won't behave in the way he wants it to and bam, things are getting flung willy nilly. Usually too quickly to even attempt diversion. The only predictable factor in this is his general mood, often relating to sleep. If he's otherwise having a good day and has slept well, he can cope with more variance or frustration before he loses it, and is thus easier to distract and divert.

Thanks for the hugs guys - really needed it today. I know it will get better, and we've had some great improvement, but it's still really rough at the moment. Kinda feel like everything revolves around Euan and we're walking on eggshells waiting for the next bomb to drop. Mixing metaphors a bit there. Mrsmac - had to giggle at your dad's words of wisdom, it makes mum's comment much more understanding by comparison. What frustrates me is that she's so fantastic with Euan (they have an amazing bond), and would walk on hot coals for him, she's so supportive of how we raise him and what we do, and helps out so unconditionally, and is very keen to learn more about autism, but on the flip side, she'll say or do things that suggest that she really doesn't get it. At all. So I feel really churlish for getting occasionally frustrated, because she is so damn supportive, but... There's always a 'but'.