i spose we all beat ourselves up are we great parents i know ive spent some nights after hes gone to bed just an utter mess crying to my partner when we go to bed and he says he hates it when im lke that cause theres nothing he can do but let me cry as its sort of my way of releasing all the frustration of the day

atm im having a hard time in public i take him to the shops and i cant relax on high alert is he touching stuff is he going to behave is he going to spitt at ppl today can i get past the yogurt isle without a mess

we allso live on a 11 acre property i have dead bolts on the outside of all my doors sounds extreme but murray can escape and be down our 2 km drive way in less then a minute