They stole 'our' name!

[catherinemoses]

Friends of our have just had a baby and they have named it the name we have chosen (and not shared!) for if we have a boy.
We have no other boy names, and we have had this name for AGES!!!!
Do you think it is still ok to use it?
They are not our best friends but they are good friends. They do live on the other side of the country and we hardly ever see them.
I'm leaning towards it doesn't really matter, but at the same time I don't want all of our mutual friends thinking we are copying!
ARGH! What a pain!

[Rach75]

i would comment how much you love the name and it is you number one choice, for bubs and how you hop ethey wont be weirded out if you go ahead and use it

it might be different in you lived in the same street same town saw each other all the time etc

[~clover~]

You don't have any back ups?

[DaintreeDream]

I agree with Rach.

You poor thing, all 3 of DH and my siblings have just had a baby this year and I was so worried that they would use one of our names, lucky for us they have totally different taste, so it seems.

I say go ahead and use it, just pre-warn them maybe that it is the name you have had chosen for a long time, but once again as Rach said, if they are in a different state it isn't like you are going for coffee all the time where it may get confusing etc.

Good Luck .

[catherinemoses]

Thanks girls.

Yeah I think the distance is a big plus. I'm more worried about looking like a copycat/ not being able to come up with our own name!

No we don't have any back ups! We decided on it very early and have just stuck with it.

Maybe we will have a little girl and I will heva been worried for nothing?!

Thanks again

[~Trish~]

Oh my goodness Cate, look at your ticker ! I can't believe you're nearly ready to pop!

Ooh, that has always been a fear of mine that a friend would chose a name that we had picked out. I reckon though that because they live so far away that you can get away with it. You can always explain to them and to anyone else who mentions it that you have had this name picked out for a very long time and can't imagine naming bub anything else. I'm sure people would understand

[Just Me]

Thanks girls.

Yeah I think the distance is a big plus. I'm more worried about looking like a copycat/ not being able to come up with our own name!

No we don't have any back ups! We decided on it very early and have just stuck with it.

Maybe we will have a little girl and I will heva been worried for nothing?!

Thanks again

I have a friend who had a baby about 2 months after me and named him the same as I named my DS. She didn't tell me until after the baby was born which name they had picked and honestly, I really don't care. I complimented her on her taste in baby names and left it at that . . . I never even considered that she named her baby that because she was copying either.

She felt a bit guilty about it and recently talked to me about it. I told her that honestly finding a boys name is hard and I wouldn't not use a name just because someone else has used it. They will know other people with their name in their lifetime and by the time they are a couple of weeks old, that name belongs to them just as much as to anyone else. It doesn't matter.

I say go ahead and use the name that you have chosen. It is really not that bad having friends with the same baby name as you. Everyone gets used to it quickly and it all just becomes part of life.

[luna moth]

TBH I think it depends how common it is - if it is really unusual, like Zeladian or something, then, yeah, it's going to look a little funny. But if it's something more sedate, like Oliver, then it's far less of an issue.

[Salsa]

I agree, just get in straight away and say something like "omg - what great taste, thats what we are naming this little one if he is a boy too!"

I had a friend who tried to change the name slightly of their newborn to my ds who was 3 mths older. I think she was a bit embarrassed but I didnt care about it, after all its not like I am the only person in the history of the world to call my child that, even though its not a common name.
They were welcome to use it and I wish they hadnt tried to pretend that they werent using the same name. Better to be upfront I think.

[star child]

Personally i would choose another name.
that would really anoy me.... esp if you had explained that you really wanted to use that name!
Hopefully you will find a better one

[ladybird11]

I hear what you're saying! This is a touchy subject for me too lol! Not that anyone has taken our name for DS as yet. (They better not as I've just ordered stickers and iron labels with his name on them lol)!

But I loved so many names, to be told by family / friends etc that "oh, that's so and so's son's name" - e.g. my brothers boss' son, or a colleague from works son etc - none of which we socialise with either by the way! But we still felt odd using those certain names - so we chose another. I'm not sure but I think it's because I like being unique - rather than just copying...

I think whatever feels comfortable for you - but yeah, I'd give them a heads up that you love the name and have planned to use that name for ages

[widdly]

How annoying for you!

When we had just started trying for our bub we were planing on giving our son my maiden name as a first name, but my Uncle used the name for his son 16 months before our DS was born, so we thought of another name and used my maiden name as the middle name instead,

Last year our good friends had their second boy, they admited to us after he was born that they were planning on stealing our girls name if he was a girl. I wasn't ofended though, the way i see it first in best dressed.

If you still love the name you should use it any way, however I wouldnt use it, cause it would be annoying having kids with the same name, maybe you could use the name as sa middle name instead

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

I'd be saying "love the name - we've picked that for a boy too! Great minds and all that" too. If you rarely see them it's not an issue. Both me and a girl from my TTC group announced our pregnancies at the same time, we gave our sons the same two first names! Without consulting each other or knowing. She just has fab taste.

[Winter]

TBH I think it depends how common it is - if it is really unusual, like Zeladian or something, then, yeah, it's going to look a little funny. .

Have you just uncovered the name of Arimeh's baking bundle?

[Curly]

I'd be saying "love the name - we've picked that for a boy too! Great minds and all that" too. If you rarely see them it's not an issue.

Exactly! You love the name, use it. And give them the heads up so you don't feel like they think you are copying...speak up asap.

My stepbrother and his wife named gave their DD the same name as our DD...they are only 3 months apart. We'd both come up with the name completely independently and we never see them...we don't really care. If their DD had been born first I don't think we would have changed our minds because we'd been set on the name for years...DS was going to be named this if he had been a girl.

It probably makes life a bit confusing for my Mum and stepdad though!

[~Trish~]

Curly - My stepbrother and his wife named their DS2 the same name as our DS1! They always liked the name so they chose to name him that even though we'd named our DS first. We don't mind, like you we rarely ever see them. It does get confusing when my mum and stepdad are talking about one of them though LOL!

[Karina]

Just use the name. No one owns the name. If you love it and it was what you were going to name bub, then just go ahead and use the name!

[Reborn]

It shouldnt be a problem. Could you maybe change the spelling??

My SIL was pg and picked Jack for a boys name even though we already had Jack our ds. She called me up and asked if it would be weird and I didnt mind. The way I figure it everyone makes their own name. And at least the last names will be different. (BTW SIL had a girl. So in the end there wasnt a problem anyway.)