If she does end up picking the same name and you both have the same gender children... send her a congratulations message admiring her taste as that's the name you're going to use for your child if he's a boy!
You don't have to change it, but letting her know early on would be polite, I think, that your children will have the same first name.
given she doesn't knwo of your choice (and it's a cute name!) i'd say it's just a fluke and run with it. your bubba will have a different middle name and will be an individual anyway.
i agree with RH - let them know, if they use the name, what great taste they have in names - either that, or get DS to blab and tell them you're naming your bubba X and then see if they change lol
If she was a very close friend then I, personally, would change the name we'd picked (very begrudgingly - names are hard!) because I'd feel a bit funny about having the same names.
But go with how you feel, if you absolutely love the name and can't imagine another one for your bub, then go for it!
Hopefully you will both have different gender bubs and it won't be an issue
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