I think the best way to cope would be to have several names picked out. Don't get your heart set on just one name. That way you always have something else. There are so many beautiful names - I have the problem of loving so many names that I can't pick just one. Dh had to pick DS's name from a list of about 20 that I liked.

If you do pick a name that has special meaning to you, such as being named after a much loved grandparent, then I would use it anyway.

Also, if anyone asks what names I have picked out, I tell them something that I like that DH doesn't that way if they "steal" it, no big loss.

I don't think people do it on purpose necessarily. I often hear a name then think "oh that's a lovely name" but in the baby name book, it had no appeal. It is rather rude if they know you have picked it then rub it in your face though - that shows they haven't forgotten it was yours. Not much you can do though.