We're going through a similar issue where DS has ben suffering from separation anxiety ever since DD was born 2 weeks ago...I think the fact that he woke up to find mum and dad gone (but his favourite uncle there when he woke up!) the morning of the birth really affected him.
Currently DH is sleeping on a trundle bed in DS' room but we're looking for solutions as well.
We've tried CIO but didn't work...once things settle down we might try one of the gentle withdrawal techniques - which I've seen on thesleepstore website.
I am too scared to try them in the same room - DS woke 4 times last night, I am worried they will just keep waking each other up and I will spend even longer with both of them screaming!
Mayaness, I am sure the impending baby has a lot to do with it. DS was a lot better but has been waking at least twice again lately. I have tried putting DD in our bed but once she is screaming she is really unreasonable and she just fought to get up again (I thought it was sure-fire since she co-slept until 18 months!). Believe me that shutting the door on her is really a very last resort thing. I hate it. I really, really hate it. I just have nothing else.
Treecyp, I hope you guys can get something sorted out soon xx. It is hard.
We have rearranged her room and have been spending time in there just hanging out on her bed reading books etc to hopefully make her happier to be in there.
I think if it is possible to try and put them in the same room. you're not going to loose anything by it. If it works you can turn the other room into the toy room. My sister had her 2 boys share and they are 22 mnths apart and the other bedroom was a toy room. They are still sharing at 9 and 11 and sometimes sleep in the same bed if they are scared (they have bunk beds)
Kelebek, I don't think the same room will work - DD often cries as she is going to sleep and now with the massive screaming fits when she wakes there is no way that DS could sleep through that. DS also wakes several times and has the odd tantrum and won't resettle which would just wake DD up (if she was actually asleep!).
I think we need some sort of professional help with regards to her sleep but I don't know where to go. I gave her phenergan for 5 nights to break the screaming cycle (advice from health nurse) but as soon as she was off it she is back to the same. I don't know what to do with her. DH got up at 2am to save a screaming fit, we thought maybe she would fall asleep in front of the telly but no, she stayed up for a couple of hours then had an overtired screaming meltdown for half an hour or so and finally went to sleep on the couch at about 5am.
DH has to work, he can't be getting up at 2am to deal with her every day. It also makes her a horrible kid to deal with during the day. I am not liking her much at the moment.
When I was pg dd got increasingly anxious about having me close. I had to take her out of occasional care, put her back in my bed and couldn't leave her with anyone. In fact the day I went into labour she screamed about going to the park with her dad!
Then as soon as the baby was here she was fine, and became even more independent. Kids sense these things, and are very sensitive to changes.
I found keeping her close helped her get over it sooner. I know how impossible that seems when you're just about to have a baby. I was in tears often with feelings of being torn between my needs to concentrate on baby and dd. But it's like all that ground work made for a really smooth transition once ds was here.
So even though it feels like a step backwards, could you sleep with her somehow or get dh to camp on the floor of her room from the start of the night, so when she wakes up she sees someone there?
I know cosleeping when pg isn't great, but could you just put her to bed in your bed?
I'm sure you've tried everything, but just wanted to offer support and let you know what worked for us.
Arcadia, it is now my only hope that she will settle down once the baby arrives because I just can't think of anything to do with her. Talked to DH about him camping in her room but neither of us think it will do any good because she won't have anything to do with him when she wakes. He has tried heaps of times to lay in bed with her but she won't allow it. Have tried putting her in our bed but she fought that as well.
HotI, I don't think that we can get Brauer stuff in NZ. Anything is worth a try at this point.
She won't even go in her bed for day naps now - same as at night time, she screams the second I try to leave the room.
We seriously can't be awake from 1-2am every single night with her! I just want some sleep!
i'm not sure if you have tried this, but what worked wonders for DD2s frequent wakeups was her sharing the room with DD1. there are still some wakeups and all that jazz, but somehow it has grounded her a bit ITMS. it could be worth a try....
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I just have nothing else.
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