Praise, praise and more praise!!! For DD1 who is nearly 4 yo - I keep commands simple and to the point and I explain why I don't like her behavior for example, Sara stop hitting your sister, it is not nice to hit people (I try to look her in the eyes because commands from a distance don't work) and when I see her playing nicely with her sister I say:Sara you are playing so nicely with your sister good girl.

For DD2 who is 20 months I use words and action. For example she has started drawing on funiture and when I see this happening I say No Loren, draw on paper only not the walls. I then walk her over to paper and tell her to draw on paper only. I am also trying to get her to keep her hat on. So before we go out I say to her: Loren "Hat on" and every time she goes to take off her hat replace the hat and say "hat on". When she does keep the hat on I cheer and clap. If she chucks a tanty I remove her from play, wait till the worst of it is over and then replace the hat with the same command and cheering, then we return to play. This has worked so well in the last couple of days.