thread: Newborn falling asleep in arms

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Mar 2007
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    1,053

    Newborn falling asleep in arms

    Our DD is only 6 days old and as first time parents DP and I are in the deep end...
    I have been reading websites discussing sleeping. She has been awake since 8am this morning (its not 230pm) We have found to get her to sleep is for her to sleep in our arms and then transfer her to her basinette. If we were to just place her in the bassinette when sleepy, she will kick and move until her wrap comes off and she is fully awake.
    The websites I read say this is not a good method... Could it be the way we are wrapping her?

    Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

  2. #2
    Registered User

    Jul 2006
    Melbourne
    3,715

    Jen, congrats on your DD!

    Hun, she is still so tiny, she only knows being inside you where it's nice and warm She just wants to be near her mum. It's up to you how you do things, but don't stress yourself out, and feel like a failure if "what you're supposed to do" doesn't work. Go with the flow, and do what YOU feel is best for your DD, you and your DH.

    I can't help with more practical suggstions as my DS was prem, and slept all the time as a newborn. Don't worry I'm paying for it now LOL.

    I just re-read your post.......that's a long time for her to be awake. Is she settled?

  3. #3
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber & MPM

    Feb 2007
    Melbourne
    5,462

    First of all, congratulations on your little girl! At this early stage I really wouldn't stress yourself out about her falling asleep in your arms. She is still very little and new and needs help going to sleep in the outside world. The things you read can really stress you out so it might be worth not reading them right now lol!

    As she gets a little older it is great if you can teach her to fall asleep in her bed by herself, not everyone likes to do this though so only do it it that is what you want, not because you think you "should" do it. In the early days I would wrap my DS, give him a little cuddle, put him in the cot and put him on his side and pat him rythmically on his back. I also used a dummy. This helped calm him down and I could then walk away to let him fall asleep by himself. Sometimes I would have to go in a couple more times for more patting, but he would eventually go to sleep. You don't have to put bub on her side, you can just pat her tummy or shoulder.

    It is all a very big learning experience and you will find some things work better than others for your DD. Don't compare her to anyone elses baby because they are all different! Just enjoy her, give her lots of love and cuddles right now. They are only that little for so long. Trust your own instincts and you will do a great job

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Mar 2007
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    She was wanting feeding a lot this morning. After lunch we have had her settled in our arms a few times. She would drift off to sleep then wake herself up. The last couple of days she would be having a 4 or so hour sleep at this time. But not today.....

  5. #5
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber & MPM

    Feb 2007
    Melbourne
    5,462

    You will find that if your bub is overtired she will find it very hard to settle and go to sleep. A bub of your age can only handle very short wake times (up to 45 minutes max including feed time). Look for her tired signs (grizzling, jerky movements, yawning) and wrap her and put her to bed.

  6. #6
    Registered User

    Jul 2006
    Melbourne
    3,715

    Don't worry Jen, it changes every day at this age. Have you got a sling that you can use for a newborn? That way she can sleep for as long or as little as she needs, knowing you are there, but you have two hands free!

    BBL, litlle one is squirming........

    Ditto what Trish said!

  7. #7
    BellyBelly Member

    Feb 2007
    3,734

    I would say enjoy it!!! It is so precious to hold you baby while they sleep. And if you need your hands I like the idea of a ring sling for a newborn.
    Dont let the books etc stress you out, just do what feels right for you guys.
    I remember feeling EXACTLY the same way when Noah was just born (I still do now!).
    I am not a great example of the get them to put themselves to sleep though - I still feed and rock N to sleep - I figure he is just a young baby and there will be times in the future when I will WISH he would sleep in my arms... so I do it that way for now and I will deal with the consequences down the track LOL! There were a few wks there when N would fall asleep himself if I fed him til sleepy and then popped him in his cot but that stage only lasted a few weeks and now he prefers his rocking or feeding into deep sleep LOL!
    Enjoy this time,, it is sooooo precious!

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Jul 2006
    Brisbane
    3,205

    In the early days that is also the only way Oskar would sleep. I ended up buying a hug a bub which others will also say they did for the same reason as me... sanity...lol. He could sleep and I could do washing or dinner etc. After a few months he then liked to sleep on his tummy during the day and was in a hammock at night (but wouldn't have a bar of it in the day - weird). Then after about 5/6 months he would sleep on my bed during the day and then finally into his cot after about a month or so..lol. So, it's a process really and there are times still now when he cries as soon as I put him down.. so we just try again later

    I still feed him to sleep at times and yet other times he's happy to chat himself to sleep. I think that if you just go with the flow and that bubs knows you are there they will slowly get themselves into a self settling habit. She is still only little and does just want to snuggle for now.

  9. #9
    ♥ BellyBelly's Creator ♥
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    Feb 2003
    Melbourne, Victoria, Australia, Australia
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    I don't know about everyone else but there's nothing I love more than snuggling up in my partner's arms at night. So comforting, I feel protected and loved. Babies feel that too Can never give enough cuddles
    Kelly xx

    Creator of BellyBelly.com.au, doula, writer and mother of three amazing children
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  10. #10
    Registered User

    Jan 2006
    8,369

    The "Sposta"s who write these books don't have children. Just remember that. They don't know how fantastic it is just to stare at your own sleeping darling and feel them in your arms. They do their routine because they make money from it -- and aren't stuck doing it for months on end.

    Your child writes her own instruction book, find out how to read that and go with it! Far less upsetting all around.
    Last edited by Ca Plane Pour Moi; February 19th, 2008 at 06:41 PM.

  11. #11
    BellyBelly Member
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    Jan 2007
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    I agree with everyone else. Your Little one will work herself out over a period of time. We used to have to rock DS to sleep, but we miss it so much now. He has taught himself to go to sleep, without resorting to controlled drying methods etc

    The sling is an excellent idea! It was my saviour in the early days. I found that DS would even sleep in the sling on the floor, so I wasn't actually holding him. I would only do this Supervised. I had a shoulder sling and It was fab

    Also, try putting bubs in a bouncer, preferably one that has a massage option on it. They work a treat. Also one of those baby swings, although I never used one, I heard they work great.

    I agree with the other girls though, enjoy it! They grow so fast, adn then before you know it, they don't want to bein your arms so much, and you really do miss it.

    Congrats and good luck

  12. #12
    Registered User

    Mar 2007
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    Thanks for the replies.

    Today has been a bad day. She will not settle for more than half an hour and that is in either DP or I arms. She has not slept in her bassinette. She must be overtired now and we are trying very hard to put her down. But she seems to want to just suckle on me all of the time.

  13. #13
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber & MPM

    Feb 2007
    Melbourne
    5,462

    Jen. This stage is the hardest as you are trying to work each other out. I promise you it will get easier soon

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