Sleep school is sleep training, and success seems to depend on the relative stubborness of the child versus your determination (or capacity to follow through the techniques).
I only know a few people who used sleep school (tresillian) and general reports were it is pretty traumatic and with varying results (one girl I know has 'failed' sleep school three times at almost 2).
Would you consider cosleeping with both kids? You might start getting longer stretches.
I was so sleep deprived by 8 months I weeped over anything. I tried sleep training early on, but you have to consistent and strong and tbh often the desperation for sleep would make me 'give in'. My dd is a particularly stubborn child though and we clash over many things. The moment I gave in and put her in my bed I started feeling human again and more like the mother I wanted to be.
I know sleep school sounds like a magic bullet, but ime there is no one solution to sleep issues. You need more support to help deal with your toddler and maybe sleeps in the day. That and cosleeping will get you through the next few months, but obviously it brings it's own challenges.
Hth. I am worried about the new bub being as wakeful as dd, because I really struggled there for a while.
I did Tresillian here in NSW and despite arguments from pro and against I was so exhausted I gave it a go. Yep V cried a bit yep I felt a bit bad and yep Im informed either way.... Yep she is a waaaay better sleeper and a happier baby and everyone has commented it has spilled into so many areas of her life that she is such a pleasure now and pleasures in life. This has not just stopped me going crazy but it has improved both of out quality of life. Hope this helps Id be happy to chat about our experience to you Good luck.
oh dear, that sounds like torture. I have one non sleeper and it must be so so hard to have two of them.
I went to the day program at the O'Connell centre (this is a public one, it is in camberwell or around that area) when my boy was around 10 months. To be honest I hated it and didn't find it particularly helpful. Actually it was kind of helpful because it convinced me I would just stick with co sleeping. BUT i know a couple of people who did the five day program there and they found it very helpful. For the day program you mostly just work with one staff member and the woman I had was not great, but during the longer program you would get to work with a number of people I guess and I think some of the staff are really nice and supportive (the woman I spoke to on the phone seemed like this). They say they don't use controlled crying but I think their methods probably result in a fair bit of crying, depending on your particular kids I guess.
There is a long waiting list but I think if you are desperate it might be possible to get in more quickly - when you ring they take your name and it can take a while for someone to call back but then they do a phone interview and I think if they felt that you were really struggling they would try to get you sooner.
to you. I haven't done sleep school, but I can see the desperation which would lead you to want to try it. I was getting about 1-2 hours sleep straight and some nights only a total of around 4... well, that was more often than not. I would sit on my bed with Elijah BFing in the middle of the night just crying cos I really wanted to sleep and not sit there and hold him I don't know what changed but he just stopped one night and slept for about 5/6 hours straight... oh bliss. He still wakes at night sometimes but not like he used to, so like I said, I can see why you'd want to try that. Elijah still sleeps next to me, in his cot. When he wakes up I find his hand and hold it and stroke the back of it with my thumb, this seems to help him, he seems to need to know he's no alone. Early morning if he wakes, he hops into bed with me and has BF and most times will roll over and go back to sleep in bed with me. Like I said, I don't know what changed, I didn't do anything but I was ready to move out by myself!! and I hope things change for you.
Up until a month ago I was nursing DD all through her dap naps as she just would not sleep in her cot through the day since she was 3 months old. I was so exhausted from nursing an 8+ kg baby for up to 2 hours per nap that I think I have caused damage to muscles as I still keep losing feeling in my fingers. We have DD booked into the Koo Wee Rup Sleep school in september, it was a long wait list BUT the woman gave me some really good advice to try in the meantime. For us DD was a good night sleeper, partly due to the fact that we still wrapped her tight, I know I know its bad I know everyone tells me she shouldn't still be wrapped but she needs it to sleep. So the woman told me to wrap her the same for her day sleeps as we do for her night sleep. I also manage (sometimes) to slip the dummy in, in place of my nipple. Doesn't always work DD HATES the dummy but sometimes i can get it in without much protest and she happily comfort sucks back to sleep then I can pop her down. I am not sure if you use a dummy but maybe if you wait until bubby is relatively sleepy and just comfort sucking you can swap boob for dummy? I also still rock for a little bit afterwards before very very gently popping her in bed. Anyway just an idea.
Best of luck x x
BhoysGirl
I don't know about sleep schools, sorry, but I'm just wondering if perhaps DS2 is going through the 4-month sleep regression thingo? Maybe it would be easier to wait that out - cosleep or whatever to get through - then tackle DS1?
We went through Mitcham and found it really helpful when DS was 8 mths old. From what I understand it is now a four night stay (it was 5 when I went) where you get to sleep the first 2 nights and then you settle the other two. If you need to they can let you stay longer. They use different plans depending on the age of the baby.
Depending on the age of the baby they either roomed in with you or had their own room which the nurses could watch via a tv screen what sleep behaviours they were engaging in so for example DS couldn't stay still and needed to learn how to stop to go to sleep. All the nurses were fantastic and it was wonderful having the support of someone else making suggestions of what you could try next no matter whether it was day or the middle of night. I don't feel like I was pushed into doing anything I wasn't happy with. I was concerned with leaving DS to cry as it wasn't the approach I wanted to take. I wouldn't say they use cry it out methods the way I understand cry it out to be. It was all about providing minimal intervention so the baby has a chance to learn how to go to sleep on their own. But each time you go in stepping up what you do so teaching them the skills to eventually do it on their own. A nurse will stand outside the door with you and help you decide what to do next. A range of techniques from verbal cues, music, patting, rocking, and wrapping are used. You do leave the room to give them the chance to go off to sleep on their own so there will be crying but the nurses were helpful in helping me hear the differences in cries and when to go back in vs when it sounded like they were just winding down.
I'd love to say when we left there everything was fixed but it wasn't. However we had some big improvements like getting an earlier bedtime from 10pm to 7pm, getting regular day sleeps going which meant I got some more breaks, stopping overnight feeding, getting into a good daily routine and he was a less cranky baby due to getting more sleep. It was also great to get some sleep behind me to give me the energy to continue on when we got home. I think there is also just a developmental component to sleeping as DS didn't start sleeping through regularly until 18mths. However the other gains were worth the sleep school stay. I know sleep school isn't for everyone but were really struggling as a family and this really helped us get out of the hole we were in.
Registered User
Good luck.
to you. I haven't done sleep school, but I can see the desperation which would lead you to want to try it. I was getting about 1-2 hours sleep straight and some nights only a total of around 4... well, that was more often than not. I would sit on my bed with Elijah BFing in the middle of the night just crying cos I really wanted to sleep and not sit there and hold him
I don't know what changed but he just stopped one night and slept for about 5/6 hours straight... oh bliss. He still wakes at night sometimes but not like he used to, so like I said, I can see why you'd want to try that. Elijah still sleeps next to me, in his cot. When he wakes up I find his hand and hold it and stroke the back of it with my thumb, this seems to help him, he seems to need to know he's no alone. Early morning if he wakes, he hops into bed with me and has BF and most times will roll over and go back to sleep in bed with me. Like I said, I don't know what changed, I didn't do anything but I was ready to move out by myself!!
Reply With Quote
Bookmarks