"If you're going to light that up, go outside away from the baby. You know we're a no-smoking house these days."

Be blunt. If she's going to ignore your wishes to even change clothes just to get a cuddle you HAVE to be blunt.

FWIW, I don't mind a smoker around my child so long as they don't reek of smoke and they don't smoke anywhere near my child. My Grandma, whom I loved dearly, was a smoker. My sister is. But my sister isn't allowed near DS when smoking... if I told her that she'd be shocked I'd even consider that she would! I have friends who smoke and I don't have a full shower before cuddling DS after being near them.