Ness, the thing with parenting is that different things work for different people. Personally, that book didn't work for me at all, but I know of others who have followed it to the letter and swear by it. If you are following it and it's working for you, stick with it. Just be aware that if you are bfing, the routines in there are not really good for maintaining a good supply.

For me, I found that what worked was setting routines around the boys' cues. For example both my boys used to get really tired pretty soon after waking up in the morning. So they used to have a sleep within an hour, sometimes half an hour, after getting up for the day. That's what worked for them, so that was the starting point for our routines. This felt right for me. Also, gentle parenting felt right for me - it's what my instincts told me to do. But that's not for everyone.

I suggest doing what feels right for you, and not worrying about what anyone else thinks. Because whatever you do you will have critics. And I am sure that you are doing a pretty great job.

Oh and WRT to the dream feed - that too is an individual thing. Jack used to sleep through the night without it, so I didn't do it with him. Tom was having a dream feed until 12 months, and usually still waking once in the night (but he'd wake twice without the dream feed). So I think it's a trial and error thing. If it works for you, go for it, if not don't. GL, it will get easier to figure these things out, it's all experience!