spoke to sleep school today

[maggie]

Hi

I spoke to sleep school today, as i am considering going in the new yr, to try and get help with setlting techniques. DS is 12weeks, nights are stil great, day sleeps are just the yukky 40min naps!!! anyhow the nurse at sleep school told me on the phone that DS at 12weeks should be having 4 naps of 1.5hrs each,, how wonderful if this happened for us,, what would i do with all my free time.. how many of your baoes are having these sleeps - would love to know. ta

[nikbrad]

Mackenzie as a bub would ususally sleep about 45 mins to an hour over the course of the day maybe 4-5 times. I've heard that a lot of babies are like this. Hurray if you can get 1.5 hours out of them each time. Good luck with sleep school if this is what you end up doing.

[Liz]

Gosh if only all babies would sleep 'by the book'! LOL. Tallon was a napper through the day, and still is. He'll sleep about 40mins to an hr through the day. I didn't worry about it because he was always refreshed by that amount of sleep.

If your DS is still tired and cranky after the shorter sleeps then perhaps some settling techniques will help. Not sure I would be expecting a textbook baby tho

[maggie]

the nurse at sleep school was so definite to the point that 40min naps are not enough... i also think that this is better then nothing, and DS usually can have about 4 of these a day.. i think that they are yuk as i can get no rest in this time, but maybe this is just how DS is....thanks guys, so nice to know that so many of us have babies who love to nap....

[christy]

maggie I had those issue with Matilda, we went to sleep school as she didn't nap at all during the day & they wanted me to settle her to sleep & if she woke than to resettle her after 40 minutes, not talk not do anything but go in & pat her until she went back to sleep.

Matilda didn't read any books either & would just scream... for over an hour. And they would say "okay, now its been an hour we will let her up & try again later" So I found I would have days and days of "settling the baby". Seriously... all I did was feed, change & settle her and get 40 minute breaks here or there... hardly enough to recharge for the hour of screaming that could follow. I didn't last more than 2 days following their techniques and in the end they modified it to suit Matilda... she also woke every 2 hours at night for feeding & that worked out better but it was a slow process getting there...

[johT]

I day sleeps are just the yukky 40min naps!!! anyhow the nurse at sleep school told me on the phone that DS at 12weeks should be having 4 naps of 1.5hrs each,, how wonderful if this happened for us,, what would i do with all my free time..

what rot!:twisted:
mine only ever had 40 min naps during the day - they were fine with it and so was i!!! I think the nurse sounds like an utter troll:P lol
i think it sounds like an easy quick fix so you can have free time - but i definetly think the methods they use are dubious and damaging - have you seen the 'Controlled Crying, Controlled Comforting or Sleep Training' article here under belly belly's baby articles?? not sure if i can post link...?

also i agree with christy, you will spend your free time 'settling'....

[*Ali*]

I had this problem with Tori at that age and I was just about tearing my hair out. But now as she has gotten older she has started sleeping longer, she now has at least 3 naps a day of 1-2 hours. Maybe it is just a faze and your DS will grow out of it in time.

[maggie]

wow thankjs guys. i also told the nurse that DS refuses to go to bed before 9pm,, once 9pm comes he will go to sleep immed- really weird, she was very discgusted that i keep him up so late, i told her if he goes down during the witching hr/colic etc, he just screams, so i dont need any added stress,, but he will or maybe sometimes sleep in my arms durin this time...

[Melinda]

Jacob was initially a cat napper also - he would do around half an hour, about 6 times a day and wouldn't go down for the night until 9 pm either.

Jacob started waking around a dozen times a night at around 6.5 months and we tried various things to try and counteract this and ended up at a gentle sleeping school here in Hobart at 9 months of age. They were very good at helping me understand Jacob's tired signs that much better - I believe that we were missing some of them, and often misinterpreting some of his cries. I learnt a lot about Jacob's needs at the sleep school and they worked with me to find a method of settling that suited Jacob. It was their belief that if you left a baby to cry and didn't attend to them, that it just teaches them helplessness - that Mummy/Daddy isn't there when they need them. I was relieved by this as I didn't want to do CC and wanted to soothe him in an effective manner. Sure, it would take up to an hour to settle him, but it did work. He would relax and eventually drift off to sleep and gained some confidence in himself to put himself to sleep. So our experience was a positive one - and there weren't any set guidelines as to "how much" sleep he should be having - it was a matter of observing Jacob and what he needed, and once we'd found some things to help settle him, his sleep during the day and night altered and he was a much happier baby - he seemed to have more energy and was overcoming developmental milestones thick and fast, as though he was just waiting to get the energy to do them!

There isn't ever any magical cure for sleeping disturbances I'm afraid - we still have plenty of bad nights with Jacob and he is well over 2 years old now. But it really did help us identify the tired signs and in finding settling techniques that were effective for him.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do, but always follow your heart and your instincts. Mummy knows what's best. And remember that there is no miracle cure and that your DS's sleeping patterns will change over time.......

[Fi]

Jenna was a shocking napper during the day. The best sleeps she would have were in the sling.
When she started going down regularly for 2 naps a day (I guess about 5-6m??) all of a sudden things started to change, and we used to get one long sleep, one short sleep.
Then when we dropped to one sleep she turned into my marvellous 1.5-2.5hr napper during the day.
Nights are still challenging on occasion, but I do agree that there is nothing you can do but live with it. It sucks - but thats having kids I spose.

I hope the sleep school is able to help you some. It would be great for you to have some reassurance that you aren't doing things "wrong". But just remember - if you aren't comfortable wiht what they are telling you to do, bubs will pick up on it, adn their techniques wnt work anyway.

[Ambah]

Gosh Maggie, I really can't believe the gall of that nurse!! I wasn't putting Aidyn down until around 9pm when he was 12 weeks, this suited him fine, and it also suited me as I could get some sleep. Rather than putting him down at 6pm, and being woken up again by him just as I have fallen asleep!
I honestly believe every baby is different, and there is no norm that they should be doing, it really makes me upset that these nurses can try to make you feel like something is wrong, when the real truth is that its not uncommon at all for babies to have those short naps throughout the day.
If you do end up going in though, I hope it is helpful, but just remember that you are boss and you can do what feels right for you (and your DS).

[Soph]

Maggie - with DD I used to get sooooo stressed about how much she 'should' be eating and how much she 'should' be sleeping but as everyone says, each baby is different. Don't stress! Night sleep IMO is the most important anyway an dyou are very lucky there! My DS is 11 weeks - sleeps fab at night (usually right through from about 9pm to 7ish with maybe 1 or 2 feeds max). Days are ok, I just go with the flow and he naps when he naps but is content other times so I don't stress. You're doing a fab job, don't doubt yourself. I went to a sleep school with my DD (actually more for her feeding issues!) and left after 1 day!!!!!! (not saying they're not good - some just need to understand each baby is unique)

[chocolatecatty]

Is a nap a sleep? Or is a nap when they lie there bright eyed and bushy tailed?
Caty's just on 6 weeks and is up till 10.30 or 11pm each night, then she'll sleep till about 4am, have a feed, then is up again at 7.
I don't understand why the nurse was disgusted at your DS not going down until 9pm?
Anyway, Caty sleeps 1.5 to 2 hours a day out of every 3 (she generally feeds every 3 hours from 7am), although between her later arvo/early night feeds she's such a grumpy bum and takes ages to settle. Thank goodness for dummies.
Hmm, I feel quite guilty after these posts for having her sleep so much. She's only slept in her cot, in her room though, and I try to put her down awake...she might cry for a few minutes, but after seeing that Dunstan (or is it Duncan?) baby language thing it's a lot easier working out what's wrong.

[pelaja]

Hi, I have an 11 week old daughter and in the beginning I was reading every book and piece of material I could get on settling/sleeping. I was told cuddling her to sleep would teach her bad habits and that she "should" be having 3-4 sleeps during the day of 2-3 hours. In the end I just thought the only reason why I shouldn't be cuddling her to sleep is for my benefit not hers. It wou;d make my life easier. I thought about that and decided I had no right to make my life easier. I prayed for her and wanted her and now it's up to me to care and love her the way she needs. She's now 11 weeks old and I'm no longer stressed about what the books say. They don't know my baby. She doesn't always need a cuddle to go to sleep but when she does I cherish it as she's already growing up too fast. She still doesn't sleep much during the day unless I'm out at the shops but I'm ok with it.

[Boo Boo]

Yeah, what an old troll that nurse is - Rylee is a catnapper - can only go for 45 mins at a time and takes me forever to get her settled during the day - I am so fed up with reading books and people saying what babies SHOULD and SHOULDN'T be doing - I have stressed myself out to the max with trying to fit Rylee into what she SHOULD or SHOULDN"T be doing that in the end both of us end in tears so I now think to hell with it - babies are babies and all are different and will do different things and when you put it into perspective when they are this little they havn't been in the outside world that long and they need time to adjust....sorry if I sound grumpy - just a tad tired - but try and go with the flow and I am told things will get easier.....sorry this isn't much help but you aren't alone. Laurin

[maggie]

thanks guys.. so much pressure is put on the feed,play ,sleep rountine , its ridiculous.. and really a cat napper cant always fit into this plan...

[johT]

oooh dont get me started on that!! - we fed, slept,awake abit ,fed, slept, etc.. MUCH, much better imo

[Tobily]

DD was like that - she would eat, play for a 1/2hr, then sleep for 2 hours all day long until she was about 9 months I guess. It was BLISS and yep you have lots of spare time

I'm not going to be that lucky with DS though - he is generally a pretty good sleeper but during the day he does fight a bit. He's not having 4 naps. Probably 2 on a bad day and 3 on a good day.