toilet training gone backwards

[~clover~]

DD2 will be 3 on Thursday. And is in nappies full time. Around christmas she made up her own mind & decided she was ready to go toilet & was doing great....Til DS came home from hospital. A week later I got sick of it & put a nappy on her. From then its pretty much been up to her. She mostly wants the nappy. A few times she's wanted undies & I've let her, But she will wet herself everytime, no matter how geed up she is about going to the toilet.
I say things like Now don't wee on Dora will you, but she does. I don't really think its an attention thing coz of the way it happens. She just forgets. She'll do it watching TV. Or playing. I know the timing says attention seeking, but it just doesn't seem like it.

Its been nearly 3 months now. Any suggestions??

[Snoopea]

bjrose,
I know just how you feel, my son was 3 in April and he just won't use the toilet, it results in all out war. I had him trained at easter, but he'd occasionally wet, we went over to melbourne so I put him in pull-ups biggest mistake i've ever made, now he's in pull ups full time, I can normally get him to do a wee with bribery but I feel like I'm .
I've been told that he'll come around so I'm hoping in the next few months he will (i don't want 2 in nappies)

Just keep persisting, we'll get there eventually, I've started making a fuss over wet jocks and full pull-ups, it seems to be helping, also I ask my son where it sould go and freely let him come in when I'm on the toilet, I hope this helps even if it's that your not alone!

Best of luck with your toilet battle!
Snoopea

[Willow]

Been there, done that. DD wasn't toilet trained until she was about 4 months off turning 3. Ironically, she was the opposite, as soon as DS came home, she 'got it'. I wonder if it was her way of getting some positive attention when so much of our time was focused on DS, but for whatever reason, she just did it.

This was our third attempt though. We tried twice before but she just wasn't ready, so Im a big believer in the old 'they'll do it when they're ready' - which is not always necessarily when we want them to!

Try not to stress about it, depsite what people say, there are lots and LOTS of 3 year olds that aren't toilet trained!

Just keep doing what you're doing if you want to persist, but there's nothing wrong with taking a break and trying again later.

[MantaRay]

Actually, going backwards is really common with TT. Bringing a new baby home is a really common cause of this, as is any routine change etc. And sometimes there is no obvious reason. We have patches with DS where he will dirty his pants for a few days in a row, then he'll be fine again. He occassionally wets but this is rarer and is obvious defiance - he will stand there and do it in front of his carer at kindy.

My personal approach is that I do not put a nappy on him. If I did that I think we'd set him back more (but I don't have a nb at home so it's a different situation). I try not to fuss about it, mostly I don't comment and then praise him when he does use the toilet. Mostly that seems to do the trick but it might take a couple of days.

GL, I am sure we will all get there sooner rather than later. Then it's round 2 with the next child!!

[aussienic]

Only suggestion I have is do you take her to the toilet every 15-30 minutes??

[Phteven]

it's annoying but she'll get there in the end.
If you think that it's because she forgets then you can ask her every now and then but not too often because it can just seem like nagging. My DS usually grabs hold of his crotch when he needs a pee but is distracted so if I see it I'll step in and remind him. If your daughter signals in any way that she needs the loo then try to remind her.

[Leemar]

OMG I am having the same problems getting my boys to poo on the toilet. They will only do it in a pull up or nappy. They are ok with weeing on the toilet but pooing is the problem.....

[MantaRay]

That's a common problem Leemar. My personal theory on it is that sitting is not a natural position to be in when pooing, so it takes them time to learn it. Squatting is much more natural actually, and you often see kids in nappies squatting to poo. Some people find using a potty helps. Either way, they do get there eventually, so hang in there.

[Phteven]

Yasin holds his poo until he has a nappy on every night. If I sit him on the loo before his night nappy goes on it makes no differance.

[~clover~]

Well that's one thing I'm happy about. She will poo in the toilet still. Every time. I'll leave her for a bit longer, coz she is the type to just say one day that she's ready & thats the end of it. I'm not too stressed.
Thanx heaps everyone. I knew it was normal, but I thought for her age it's a bit much.
Thanx again.