Lol, you've cracked me up! First with the frogs, then with the "he's not a man" comment (I agree, why on Earth would he turn down having his own man cave??).

As for the original question, my first choice would be to have everyone in the master bedroom. Second choice would be to move everyone down the back. Have you done like ZF did, and alert council/police? Would they be able to put up some kind of barrier?