Where to go Sleep School? I need help i've had enough!!!

[FabFiona]

If you ring lots and cry it can help you get bumped up the list.

[AnyDream]

If you ring lots and cry it can help you get bumped up the list.

Not necessarily true. Children who are not eating/feeding well get priority over sleep issues, no matter what your level of mental deterioration. If there might be even the slightest feeding/weight gain issue make sure you emphasize it as it will get you thru the door sooner.

because sleep deprivation is such a hard place to be in.

[*Danni*]

I was thinking the same! If it's any consolation to you, my son who is a month older sleeps worse than that. He has 1x 60-90 min sleep a day and wakes about every 2.5-3 hours overnight.

Ahaha I think I'm winning my son wakes up every 1.5-2.5 hours all night long!! Ahhh it's soooo exhausting.

op I hope you find a solution you're happy with. And don't forget to come on here and share some tips hehe. My gosh it's hard!!!


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[MamaPan]

how are you going EJ?

[*EJ*]

I will be back ladies, i'm in the middle of making a birthday cake for DS1. Got do do it while i have two in bed

[*EJ*]

I called the O'Connell Family Centre and they have sent out paper work to fill in, once i've sent it back and then go on a waiting list to get an interview phonecall.

Tweedle called me and we had a good chat but she was saying how i was quite a ways from where they are. Not sure if i was talking to the Geelong one or the Melbourne one. She was saying i'd be better off going to QEC. So anyway we had a chat and she spoke about what i should do and obviously it'd be the same thing as they'd do if i was there.

I can't remember what she called the method now but it only ever involves leaving the room for 10-20 seconds at a time which i dont' really do anyway. Not sure if this helps the situation but i prefer to stay in there and try to settle her to sleep that way. Just reasuring her the whole time. After speaking to you guys we were having what i'd call good nights where she'd wake every 4ish hours without any going back to sleep issues (this is when i get all confused about what i want to do because it's easy and it works) but then two nights ago she wanted to do 2 hours and i decided No. So i stayed with her, yes she cried, i picked her up when she was upset and put her back in her cot once she was getting sleepy again. Took some time but she was starting to fall asleep. Eventually DH walked in to see if i needed any help and i took it as my chance to say it's your turn and walked out. He said he just spoke to her, didn't have to pick her up and she fell asleep. She then woke at 6am for the day. Last night she woke about 10ish and i fed her, she then woke again ant 1ish and we tried the settling again. Didn't take as long, she still cracked it a bit but it was ok. She woke again at 3ish i think which took less time to settle again. I go in to her and do my bit then i get DH, with DH she really knows that she won't be getting a feed.

I understand that even this would not be the preferred methods for some but for me i needed to take this approach. We are about to go on holidays so i realise my timing isn't great because to ensure we don't wake the whole caravan park up i may not be able to stick with this but that's ok i'll deal with that. I just need to feel like i'm doing something to help the both of us. She still wakes up in the morning her happy little self and gives me those big beautiful hugs. She still loves me

Goodness Danni, how are you managing that? I went through a stage of DD doing that Oct-Nov last year, i feel your pain. I'm here to chat if you need me

Sleep school was always my last resort but i just knew i needed to do something. I'll try this for now and after our holiday we'll see how we settle back in and take it from there i think.

Thanks so much for all your support i really appreicate it

[onthefly]

Glad to hear your DH is helping out
EJ, don't worry about what anyone else things or would or wouldn't do, ok? She's your baby and you know her and what she needs. Noone else does.

I will say one thing though () - don't be afraid to be flexible sometimes. If you're having a really rotten time and it's not working, just go back to feeding (or whatever will help), you can always pick this up again the next night.

Hope it's a great holiday!

[*EJ*]

Glad to hear your DH is helping out I will say one thing though () - don't be afraid to be flexible sometimes. If you're having a really rotten time and it's not working, just go back to feeding (or whatever will help), you can always pick this up again the next night.

Yes that is true MadB, obviously there will be nights where she might have a true complaint of some kind and not just wanting hugs and a feed because that's all she's known. Just to move towards a bit more sleep during the night will be good enough for me.

Thanks looking forward to getting away, just do not want think about packing... Really need to do that though

[FabFiona]

You could pack while you are awake at night with DD!

I too hope you have a good break. I've been where you are and made it out the other side so I know what you are going through.

[*EJ*]

Thanks FabFiona, can't wait to come out on the other side

[willow5]

*EJ* how's it going? Hope you're getting a bit more sleep.

[*EJ*]

Thanks for checking on us williow5. We're doing ok. As expected whilst on our holiday i just had to do what works which was always what i planned to do. On the first night we got there (after a 9 hour drive which she handled so well) she slept 7 hours!!! Add that to the list and i may almost be able to count the times this has happened on one hand

Since we've been home i got back into trying to make my changes within a few days. We have all ended up a little blocked up in the nose but for the most part we're doing really well. The feed times and sleep times are still seperate execpt for if she wakes between 4-6am. It's varying the amount she wakes and how well she settles but i'm doing what i feel comfortable with and trying to avoid going to sleep school.

Tonight my girl pretty much told me she wanted to be placed in her cot by arching her back and leaning towards it, there wasn't a sound out of her once she was lying down. I just want sleep time to be a happy place for her.

Thanks so much for all your help. Hope things are well with your little man

[willow5]

That's great sounds like things are on the improve. Glad you're dong what you're comfortable with, anything else would probably be a recipe for disaster anyway. Hope you keep getting those 7 hour sleeps!

[*EJ*]

Just want to update again.

Since getting home i got right back into no feeding to sleep and doing my best to get DD to resettle during the night without a feed. We seem to be getting somewhere which is great. Two nights ago we had 8 hours sleep!! I woke up at one stage with the 'oh should i check her??' feeling but i must have fallen back to sleep before i could do so. She woke at 5:30am had a feed and went back to bed for another hour. I'm happy with that.

The next night was a little up and down. If she takes a few times to resettle during the one waking i generally give her a feed as i figure she must really want one or something else may be bothering her that a feed can fix.

Last night was 7 hours. and then a couple of wakings before we got up for the day.

Thanks so much for your support ladies. I'm thinking i may be able to get buy without sleep school now, what we're moving towards i am much happier with. She still wakes and occasionally i still feed her but i'm fine with that. It's a big improvement on where we were late last year.

It's amazing what a decent nights sleep can do, things are so calm in our house at the moment and that's with all the walks to and from kinder and trips to mini maestros and fitting sleeps in. Hmmmm... Now it's time to start convincing DH to add one more precious little member to our family Don't know what hope i've got but i'm going to give it a try

[RhiChiChi]

So glad to hear all is going fairly well. Sounds like it was just a matter of time and possibly some maturation of your DD part?

[willow5]

Sounds like a you're doing really well. Oh yeah some sleep makes a humongous difference!

[*EJ*]

Another update girls...

We were doing really good and i was (and still am) happy with where we are now compared to a few months ago but we're a bit stuch again now and i've been back on the phone to the sleep schools. The problem became getting DD to sleep day and night, lots of rocking in our arms, lots of her fighting to get out of my arms but then screaming when i put her in the cot. She is starting to wake frequently again but i manage to resettle until about 4am but after that she insists on a feed (cheeky think some how knows the time) and will wake up every hour after that where i just keep feeding her to sleep to let me get one more hour of sleep. So last week i'd had enough again.

I called QEC and i completed the paper work from the o'connell family centre. I heard from both of them today.

QEC was really quite short and simple, let her scream for 5 mins at a time and pretty much said do you want to try it at home or come here to do it? I know something needs to be done so i very reluctantly said put my name down just so as i don't have to go through the waiting process again. Pretty much deep down knowing that i'd never go there though. My expereince with DD screaming is she is very very stubborn and don't know that it will be as simple as that for her. Wasn't very impressed with them at all.

The lady from the o'connell family centre was much more interested in DD and us (our family) and what my concerns/challenges with her were. She has offered me a residential stay next week which i have taken. It's going to be a bit to organise with the boys but i'll make it happen. All along i have been so hesitant to do this but i feel good about this now, i'm hoping that with a little more than just one day we can take things a little gentle and take some time to really look at a few issues we have combined to make some changes for the better... i know i have to do something.

I'll let you know how we go

[Tilda]

OMG this sounds exactly like what I'm going through with DD2 at the moment. Like exactly - frequent waking, 4am bad spot, even the fighting if I pick her up, screaming if I put her down. I hope the residential stay helps!! Tell me the secret if it does!!