Does it take 3 hours of feeding to get her to sleep?

I think getting a clingy baby to self settle is unrealistic. Sure some babies will do it, but that doesn't mean your dd can or should. Can you find a way to spend time with Dh while getting her to sleep? What if he came and lay down with you on the big bed and you breastfed while have some whispered chats with Dh? Or can she just stay up longer with Dh to play with her so you can go for a walk/have a shower/read a book to yourself each night?
Couple time is important but it doesn't have to be every evening. What about scheduling a date night?

I know you asked about sleep, but in my experience relying on a baby and sleep to achieve other things is just a recipe for frustration. I much prefer to plan around it itms?