Have you ever sat down with him and told him how you felt? When I first realised we'd be on a single income I got all upset about being financially dependent. I told DH the thought of being controlled by someone else over money gave me the heeby jeebies. It really upset me.

So we have a joint account for day to day transactions. He has his account and I have mine. When I'm not earning, he transfers money to my account. We also have a budget, though we're not great at keeping to it.

If you think he wouldn't want to be controlling, then tell him you don't want to be controlled by money, with your hand out like a child requesting an allowance. He may not realise that's how you feel or what he's doing is placing you in such a painful situation. If he disagrees or doesn't value how you feel, then that's a whole other ballgame.

I think society values the $ productive hours (ie a paid job) a lot more than the non-$ productive hours (all the rest) that goes into running a house/family. But it all counts. If you worked out how many hours you work at home and multiply that by the minimum wage ($14.50 I think), then you can get an idea of a base value in $ productive terms. If you looked at actual nanny/housekeeper rates, it would be a whole lot more, taking into account overtime, leave, superannuation etc. Less Tax on that and it should be an interesting calculation.