Its such a tough one. My girls are at a private school now - kindy and pre-primary, and it is a struggle for us to pay two sets of fees on a single income but the private school is a kazillion times better than the local public primary schools. We moved to thsi area a couple of years ago and it was something we factored into our decision - had we stayed in our old house the girls would have gone to the local public school. I will be home with our new baby for a few years (we have agreed that is the right thing for our family), so things are going to be very tight. When DD3 starts kindy there is no way I won't be having to work - just to keep the fees up for the three of them.

I do think we have all become more materialistic and perhaps unreasonable in our views of what we "need" to have a good life. Time at home with your family when you're not shattered from work is a different issue though. Is it possible to send them to the public school to begin with, and then the Steiner school later? In your position, if you think the public school is still good then I would be inclined to try that out first. If you have issues, or when your kids are older, then you can reassess.