DIY Deliveries: More Women Go It Alone (US)

[s361768]

I was under the impression that freebirth is unassisted if it is without the assistance of a medical practitoner (i.e. doctor, midwife), who carry medical equipment with them to provide medical attention if needed.

Freebirthing women trust in their body and own instincts while birthing not with medical people present telling them what to do and/or what their body is doing. This is my idea anyhow from reading I have done.

Don't get me wrong I am due in 3 weeks and am scared out of my brain, but can not overcome the severe anxieties of birthing in a hospital. I could not grit and bare a hospital again.

I am glad I have my doula and partner, I am concerned that I will not have a midwife present but can not keep dwelling on it because I can not possibly afford one. I just have to trust in my body that I can do this and that if something does happen I can transfer to a hospital.

On the issue of irresponsibility though, I guess it doesn't make sense to me to be calling freebirthers irresponsible when homebirth with midwife carries the same dangers/risks (and is considered by doctors to be just as CRAZY). I know of someone who had a homebirth with an experienced midwife present and it went horribly wrong for the baby. So a midewife being present (no matter how knowledgable they are) is not a 100% insurance policy against the dangers that could happen (in rare instances).

[paradise lost]

Hi s361768,

I'm sorry you had such a terrible experience in hospital. The most striking thing about your post to me is when you say:

It is lovely that you can afford a midwife to come to your home and assist you in birthing your baby. I can not afford this luxury at the present. However I will not being backed into a corner. I do not want to have this baby in a hospital.

That was my point entirely - birth, normal healthy birth in the setting you choose (home) should NOT BE a luxury! I am in the UK and my homebirth was NHS provided, though if i could have afforded a private MW i'd have gotten one to avoid having to jump through the NHS hopps when i was so vulnerable. It is moot to talk about women "choosing" unassisted birth when their options are unassisted birth or major unecessary surgery! What kind of a choice is that?! It's like saying "Do you want to run this marathon with no shoes or no legs?"!

I don't think Cricket is saying it is irresponsible to birth at home, just that the option of unassisted birth isn't as safe as MW-attended homebirth. Given your set of experiences and options i too would be doing what you are doing. I am frightened to birth without medical back up but i am FAR more frightened of abdominal surgery.

:hugs: to you, i hope everything goes beautifully for you all.

Bx

[kirsty_lee]

I remember when i first fell pregnant i wanted to do a home birth/water birth but then i read all these really scary stories which quickly changed my mind just seems like a really big risk and i would hate for anything to go wrong

[paradise lost]

i read all these really scary stories

I read a lot of scary studies. That was why i went for homebirth. Statistically it's the safest thing to do, that is the mortality rates are the same as for hospital birth but with intervention rates being a lot lower.

Bx

[kirsty_lee]

"but can not overcome the severe anxieties of birthing in a hospital. I could not grit and bare a hospital again."

Haha this was one of the reasons why i wanted a home birth.. i reckon i would feel so much more comfortable giving birth in the comfort of my own home, i absolutely hate hospitals, no matter how nice the staff are i just prefer my own space especially when im sick or in pain...

[s361768]

I am very envious of women who have great hospital births and I wonder how they managed it, it makes me feel somewhat inadequate like I did something to bring on the experiences I had birthing my first 2 sons in hospital.

but it has been a real eye opener for me, I know I am not the only one who have had these experiences in hospital and it has opened a new window of learning opportunity for me in regards to pregnancy, labour and birth. So my first birth which was highly intervened with (almost losing my first son because they overdose us with pethidine) and my CS (internal bleed after op) and horrible scar were not for naught.

I have learnt more about my body and how a pregnant, labouring and birthing woman should be treated....and this is to be nutured and respected during this wonderful and miraculous time in her life.

[paradise lost]

There are no 100% guarantees with birth, it's true.

It is statistically safer to have a midwife there mainly because of the midwives training and equipment. There are scenarios which can be easily dealt with at home with no fuss (Post partum bleed, nuchal cord, slow to start bubs) provided there is someone there with the knowledge of what to do and the experience to do it, and the equipment they need to do so (in the expamples above sinctocin intermuscular injection (though a bite of the raw placenta can be a good alternative), untangling the cord/clamping and cutting before the body is born if it is preventing descent, bulb syringe for suctioning nose and throat and oxygen). The majority of births will not NEED that eqipment/help, but it is safer to have it there if it is needed.

I too know of as homebirth which went tragically wrong only a few weeks ago, but there is no real reason (beyond the natural tendency to think "if only" when something goes wrong) to think it would have been better in hospital and i know dozens of births which went well at home and would have been less positive in hospital - my own DD was shocked by the speed of labour and aspirated a little mec. Apgars were 9, 7, 10. The midwives suctioned her mouth and nose, put her naked on my naked belly and gave her a bit of oxygen from a tube i just held near her face. If we'd been in hospital she'd have spent her first night in SCBU having 2-hourly p rick tests for glucose etc. because of her rocky start. As it was she spent her first night wrapped against my chest feeding on and off and perfectly fine.

If it is any comfort, whatever birth you decide, whatever parenting decisions you make in fact, you will always find SOMEONE who thinks you're crazy and irresponsible.

Bx

[paradise lost]

I have learnt more about my body and how a pregnant, labouring and birthing woman should be treated....and this is to be nutured and respected during this wonderful and miraculous time in her life.

AMEN to that!

Bx

[s361768]

Yes I agree that the presence of a midwife is ideal, I know that with my next pregnancy and birth (planned this time) I will make sure I endevour to have one.

This bub is no. 4 and will be another little boy so my parnter and I are just hanging out for that little girl. So perhaps we will get another shot at it.

By the way my 3rd labour went ok at home with a doula but I was scared and when I started getting the urge to push I wanted to go to hospital...my poor doula in the back seat of my car with me while we are driving to hospital and I am trying to keep him in (This was my VBAC).

I think I can do it at home at least I won't have hosp midwife tugging on my cord to get placenta out even after short period of time. It took 18 min for me to birth placenta!!!

Kirsty Lee are you having a homebirth with this little bub?

Hoobley thank you for making me feel good about my decision, I know it is not the most ideal. But the horrors of hospital birth.... Wish there were more options out there for women in regards to their health care. Womens health care is not what it should be!!!

And no one say don't complain...western women get the best health care in the world lalala. It has a long way to go.

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

HAHAHA at good care. I too feel VERY jealous of women who get out of hospital unscathed and feel inadequate - very inadequate - whenever I hear ANY birth story. Even if it all went wrong, in other stories I can see how it is not the mother's fault it went wrong, in mine I just blame myself. Western medicine is good for many thing, but birthing ain't one of those things!

Freebirth is alone. Assisted birth is not alone, no midwife. "Homebirth" as it is known medically is at home with a midwife who wants you in a hospital because then they can rest more and nip out for lunch/coffee (as my midwife did when I was pushing). Hospital birth is drugs and surgery, or giving birth too fast to avoid it.

[s361768]

why did your midwife take off for coffee break while you were pushing? That is terrible

and yes I am amazed to at what the wonders of modern science has done for western medicine but health care is political and women do not benefit as much as what they think in this country. Womens health is very defragmented. It is controlled and think about what info and health choices we have access to...why and why not?

birth control options and inequites re. this for women of diff social class. (there was a male birth control drug but was taken off market because it caused lose of libido, boo hoo think about how birth control effects womens health) Treatment in settings and access to appropriate councelling in case of unplanned/unwanted pregnancy. Also the way women are made to feel about their bodies in todays society is not GOOD,

I could go on...but I wont However this has a lot to do with womens reproductive lives. Women need to make more demands for appropriate health services and quality of care but the bad treatment doesn't just apply to pregnancy labour and birth

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

Lunch break. And it wasn't just pushing, this was after she had pushed me into having a drip and an epidural so I needed help to be on my knees and help with how to push, which I was doing perfectly (according to her) before she wouldn't let me continue without drugs. Yes, she said that I wasn't allowed to not have drugs. She was away for maybe an hour, I was left with my albeit fantastic student and a midwife I had never met before! No wonder I didn't want to go on really.

ETA she had 2 coffee breaks between 8am and 12.30pm (which was lunch), but I was fine with that as I didn't want a midwife around! Once I was in theatre she didn't have a break (1.30-4.30ish), so had to dash off and leave DH and me alone (with no baby and no answers) in recovery for over an hour.

[s361768]

that sounds absolutely horrible I am so sorry you had to go through that

[suse]

Although I would loved to have homebirthed, freebirth is not something that I would personally be comfortable in doing, but in my case, it is moot as I will not be able to birth vaginally if I do have another kid - very narrow pelvis. This wasn't discovered until I was 30 hours into labour (or thereabouts), and had been pushing one very stuck baby for 3 1/2 hours, so in my case I would have ended up in hospital for a c/s anyway, regardless of where I started the birth.

Birth, no matter which form it takes, is not risk free. This is the case whether taking place in a medical setting or at home (assisted or otherwise). There is the risk of (sometimes unnecessary) intervention in a medical environment that may lead to further complications. There is the risk that complications that arise in a home- or free-birth setting may not be able to be resolved as quickly as they would be in a medical facility. No matter what we do or where we are, there is the risk that something might go wrong. This is not being fatalistic, this is the unfortunate reality. It is up to each of us to perform our own risk analysis and make our own decision.

We have the right to give birth in whatever way we feel most comfortable with, to have the risks minimised as far as possible, and to birth in a supportive, safe environment. Whatever and wherever that is.

I would imagine that women who choose to freebirth do not make their decision lightly and are aware of the potential risks - they just feel that the alternative is riskier.

I admire the bravery of those who do choose to freebirth, but I'm aware that others may consider my decision to birth in hospital equally brave.

[Rouge]

Whilst its not something I agree with I can understand it. I do worry though that it can be dangerous sometimes. In some states (not sure if its victoria) if you intentionally have a freebirth it can be a criminal offence especially if there is a problem with bubs. For me I could never live with myself if something went badly as a result of my decision, when I knew it may have been prevented by extra care (not always the case but sometimes yes). I think homebirths are great (I would have loved one!), but I'm not 100% on freebirthing. It just makes me believe stronger that midwives should not be a luxury, they should be available to all women who want a home birth, in the same way we can walk in off the street and give birth in a public hospital.

[sushee]

I don't think that having a hospital birth automatically signs you up for birth full of drugs and surgery, and TBH, I think it's statements like that which causes there to be a divide between women as to the different sorts of births they have. It is unnecessary IMO to talk one choice up at the expense of another choice. I understand some of you have had hospital experiences that were just terrible, but I have had a very positive birth experience in hospital (no intevention, midwife barely there, birth beautiful) as well as intervention that was very much needed and in fact requested by me (ROM, Induction as baby was in distress). I think empowerment is about being informed and making your own choices, and yes that choice can and does include hospital.

I support homebirth and in ideal circumstances, would love to have had one, but chose to birth in a hospital for a variety of reasons. I think you can be of both camps sometimes.

Freebirthing to me (completely unassisted) scares me with it's potential for something to go wrong. Without incident, I imagine it would be an incredibly life-affirming event, but to have not even one person there to watch your back and to come to your aid if you need it is probably something I myself would never be comfortable with.

[Trillian]

I often wonder that if sometimes the vehement cries of "I will NOT give birth in a hospital ever again" are often just 'cutting off your nose to spite your face'. It takes an extraordinary person who can truly abandon everyone around them and give birth alone, knowledgable in the possible consquences (which can happen in any birth in any setting) and not reach a point where they chicken out so to speak and request help, or even to go to hospital. Do you feel that you would be able to deal with a surprise breech baby, or a baby with its cord around its neck - how do you propose to deal with those problems if they arrise? I wouldn't have had a hope of being able to reach down there to get the cord from around my son's neck if I had gone it alone with my last birth, and even if I managed that, how would I have gotten his shoulders out, that had gotten stuck, and then after all of that, would I have had the strength to be able to rescusitate him when he needed it? It's all well and good to say that you (being the generalised *you*) are going to freebirth, or even an assisted birth with only a DH or other support person there, but Doula's aren't necessarily medically trained. What are *you* going to do to train yourself to deal with these and many other problems? The women who freebirth aren't stupid or crazy, often they are midwives themselves, but either way they learn what they need to be able to do it as safely as they can. And if the worse does happen, how do you deal with that? there is no one to blame except one person; no obs with hands (to borrow a phrase Ryn), no mean spirited midwives, no dodgy hospital systems and 'regulations' can you deal with that?

By no means am I advocating for hospital births, but there are so many options available to us if our first (or subsequent) experiences were not what we wanted - get a new Dr, change hospitals, use a birth centre, homebirth, or even freebirth, but do so with the knowledge and expertise that you have learned, don't do yourself a disservice by not learning the tools you need. You can give birth on your terms in any setting.

[s361768]

Sheree,

It sounds like you are advocating hospital births...with all these horrible things that could occur in childbirth for mother and baby.

I think you said that you had trouble birthing your baby and I am sorry for your experience. I believe not all women have these complications while birthing, just the same as not all women go through the nightmare that many go through in the public hospital system, I know women that have had great births in the hospital.

However Sheree, I don't think that I am cutting my nose off to spite my face!!!
If it is not a public hospital birth then what is it, a birth centre that you have to sign up for at the hosp but will never possibly get into (experienced it), a midwife through the hospital system (again) that will come to your home for visits (I haven't heard back from the hospital regarding that...it's been almost 7 months...gee I only have 3 weeks to go). Hmmm changing hospital, been there. So I have birthed in 2 Brisbane hospitals within good proximity to me. Should I travel down the Bruce Highway or Logan Motorway while in labour to birth just in the vain hope that the next hospital an hour away won't treat my body and baby like it means nothing to them.

Birthing with a Doula and my partner in a medically unassisted birth, I understand this and have said before, I can not afford the LUXURY of a midwife, but won't go to hospital (unless I have to) because of my experiences. And by no means am I being vehemant when I say this. I am upset that I don't have many options. Hospital would be great if I could trust them to support me during my labour and birth, the way I want to be supported.

I am rather quite mentally tired thinking about whether I should or I shouldn't go to the hospital because of the back and forth "what ifs" and "do I truly need the hospital to birth my baby, other women do and they come through it unscathed and at least the baby is healthy and alive and that is the main thing"

It doesn't help when other women, who may not have been faced with similar experiences, say so blindly that you are being irresponsible or that you are cutting your nose of to spite your face because of a choice not to birth in a hospital setting and even unassisted.

Women should be supporting other womens birthing choices because the medical model doesn't support a women in making her own choices, rather they are made for her.